Back Home
by SJKennedy
Summary: A young detective returns to Boston, desperate to piece together a case she believes holds the key to her family's past. A past/present/future Rizzles story.
1. Chapter 1

_Its been awhile since I've written fanfiction - so long that I can't get into my old account (Sammy41). But I was inspired to start over with a new R&I story. I think of it as a blend between This is Us and True Detective if that makes any sense. It jumps around quite a bit, way into the future and back to Jane and Maura's beginnings as a couple. While new characters will be introduced, this is a Rizzles fic at heart. Also I know this is a long start for a first chapter but there was a lot to establish. __All reviews are appreciated! __~ Sam_

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She was back in Boston. Boston in the middle of winter. So cold the newscasters called it a polar vortex, nearly begging people to stay inside as temperatures plummeted to 25 below zero. But it didn't deter her. In fact, she thought it a fitting homecoming.

Despite the arctic chill, sideways snow and icy streets that looked like glass, the Boston Police Department was abuzz with activity. Uniformed officers whisked about, bundled but still authoritative. Everyone knew their place. Everyone had somewhere to go. It was one of the many things she loved about the force.

She stomped the snow off her boots and pulled off her thick parka as she crossed the threshold. She expertly weaved her way through the busy men and women of BPD, only stopping once she reached the front desk.

"I'm here to see Captain Rizzoli," she announced.

The woman who was fixated on her computer suddenly flickered with recognition. She opened her mouth, then closed it, and then finally opened it again.

"Alexandra?" she said.

"AJ," she replied, though she regretted the correction. She should have been more grateful that the front desk cop didn't say something more regrettable. Something related to the clear nostalgia she was experiencing.

"Sixth floor," the woman clipped. She was older. Perhaps a street cop at one time, now riding out the last years to retirement. "He's expecting you."

"Thanks," AJ nodded.

The cops at the security barrier allowed her to pass through. Allowed her to pass the BPD café on her way to the elevator. AJ refused to look at the spot. She'd managed to make it this far without collapsing into painful memories. She wouldn't allow herself to break now.

On the lone elevator ride, she attempted to compose herself. She pulled in slow, deep breaths. She kept having to remind herself that this was what she wanted.

She wanted to come home.

The nameplate on the door was the second flutter to hit AJ's chest. She lingered longer than necessary to read the neat black ink against the silver plaque: _Captain Francesco Rizzoli Jr. _She knocked on the door before a lump had a chance to form in her throat. She would do this. She had to do it.

"Come in," he said.

AJ's appearance overtook him all at once. His mouth spread into a wide, nearly overjoyed grin. But his brown eyes, always soft and soulful, filled with a pain she was all too familiar with. Whatever sadness was there, however, was overshadowed by his quick movement from behind the desk. In an instant, Captain Rizzoli, held her in a tight bear hug.

"I didn't think you'd make it," he confessed.

"Of course, I did," AJ replied.

She found herself stiff and uneasy in his hold. It was the type of thing she wanted to avoid. One of the many, many good reasons to not come back to Boston. He seemed to sense that he was doing most of the hugging and gave a nervous laugh as they released.

"Take a seat, take a seat," he instructed.

AJ carefully settled into the chair across from his, watching as he anxiously fidgeted behind his large oak desk. He suddenly didn't seem like the man with a silver plaque on his door and one of the biggest offices at BPD. As much as she tried not to allow it, AJ no longer saw Captain Rizzoli but Frankie. The man who gave her piggy back rides and snuck her sweets when she was a young girl. She could see him at family gatherings, yelling and shouting with the rest of their massive clan. But it came with another glaring memory. It flashed across her mind just as quickly as the sweet recollections. His forlorn face in the rain, streaked with tears. They were all in black and he couldn't look at her. Couldn't look at them.

"You get here okay? This weather is brutal," he said.

"I still have my roots. I think my bones were made to stand the Boston cold," AJ joked.

His grin was back and a twinkle lit up his gaze.

"You're a Rizzoli, that's for sure," Frankie replied.

There it was. AJ Rizzoli. She tucked a loose piece of brown hair behind her ear where it'd come loose from her ponytail. She wanted to smile, to give some reaction to Frankie's family pride, but couldn't manage. She could see he was pondering the next question. The sour note that filled the air.

"How's your mother?" he asked.

"She's good," AJ replied quickly. She knew he'd ask. She knew someone at the station would ask. And she'd practiced her response over and over in the car. She'd say it quick. So quick that it might convince someone.

Frankie frowned but decided to move on. "And your brothers?"

"Which one?" she asked.

"Both."

"They're good too," she managed. "How's aunt Nina? And Chris and Lucy?"

"Also good," Frankie said, giving her a slight dip of his brow, clearly disapproving of her brief answers. "Your aunt Nina keeps bothering me about retiring. But I've told her I'm finally at the good part. Plus, with the kids gone, I think I'd drive her crazy at the house."

"That's not true," AJ told him.

"No, I suppose not," he chuckled. "But I keep telling her I'm young. Sixty is the new forty."

Despite all his charm and youthful buoyancy, AJ could see the marks of age on her uncle. His dark, Italian hair was somehow thinning near the front and gray set in at the temples. It made him look distinguished but certainly older. He also wasn't nearly as fit as his days as a detective or even as a sergeant and later lieutenant. He filled out his suit now with a small beer gut and less toned arms. And when he picked up her personnel file on his desk, he put on a pair of thick rimmed reading glasses.

"So, you're finally done with those Yankee bastards?" Frankie asked.

"You could say that," AJ replied.

"Well, NYPD is all well and good but it's time you come play for the real good guys," Frankie said.

"It's time I come home," she agreed.

The words nearly stopped in her constricted throat and her amber eyes met her uncle's for the first real time that January afternoon. She let him see the emotion. The simultaneous fear and gladness, sorrow and fulfillment, that came with her arrival in Boston. That came with walking the halls of BPD once more. The place that had somehow been a second home. Frankie tilted his head to the side in quiet understanding.

"You look just like Janie, you know? A spitting image," he muttered. AJ looked away. "I'm sorry, you must get that all the time. I know you want to be your own person. But seeing you here, in this station, all grown up...it's something."

AJ sat up straighter in her seat, wringing her hands together. She sniffled back any emotion, her olive skin going taut against her firm jaw.

"I don't want to be treated any differently here. Not because my uncle is the Captain or because she's my mother," AJ said seriously.

Frankie nodded, taking on a more professional countenance.

"You won't AJ. You're an exceptional detective in your own right. Your record out of New York is outstanding," he said. "In fact, I know you always had eyes on the FBI. You could jump straight there if you wanted."

"I want to be here," she told him. "I _need _to be here."

"This is about her, isn't it?" Frankie asked.

AJ swallowed hard. "Of course, it's about her."

**..30 years earlier..**

Jane Rizzoli was coming back home. Back to Boston. Back to Boston in the middle of summer.

It's not how she pictured her homecoming. In fact, each time she thought of what was driving her away from Quantico, she stepped on the gas a little harder. The anxiety swelled in her gut, causing her to clench the steering wheel with a white-knuckle grip. So hard, that the scars on her palms started to ache. Jane let it hurt. The throb kept her on edge. Something she was certain she needed to be now.

She'd been in Quantico for just over a year. And in all that time, she'd never returned to Boston. Not for Christmas. Not for Thanksgiving. Not even for TJ's fourth birthday. Angela took the decision deeply personal, and of the many things Jane wasn't looking forward to, seeing her mother was near the top of the list.

But the main reason Jane didn't want to return to Boston, was the same reason she was rushing back in the first place.

Dr. Maura Isles was in trouble. And like so many other times, it meant Jane was in trouble. It meant Jane would come running back. Not just to protect the woman she once called her best friend, but because that woman was home.

It took Jane several years and one trip around the world to come to the realization. And even then, it wasn't enough to keep them together. Not enough to bridge the gap that always seemed to exist between them. The poor timing, the fear of intimacy and concern that perhaps they'd lose something sweet in the gamble to find something real.

And Paris had been a gamble.

Jane knew that the second she bought the ticket. It was on her mind the entire flight next to her best friend. She wanted to blurt it out every second of every day since the realization hit her; she couldn't live without Maura by her side. And the thought of not telling her was more unbearable than losing her.

They spent the first few days of Paris in bliss. Jane had never been so far from home and Maura's passion for travel, history and art made her a perfect – and adorable – tour guide. She indulged Jane in all the must-see first-time Parisian stops. The Eiffel Tower, a tour of the Louvre, and the Arc de Triomphe. But it was the moments away from the crowds and all the lights, that Jane truly found peace.

Moments like when Maura shook her awake to watch the sunrise. That same morning when she took her by the hand and held it all the way until they reached a small hole in the wall café for coffee and pastries. They rode bikes in never ending fields. They swam late at night in the hotel pool. They passed hours talking over bottles of wine and laid on the couch with books and feet in each other's lap.

In all those moments, Jane thought of telling the truth. Every time she found Maura's jade eyes her heart screamed with the confession. And each time, Jane swallowed it down like burning liquor. Each day it hurt worse to not speak the truth. By the end of their first week in paradise, she knew she had to let it go.

The task demanded the shield of night and courage of wine. Looking back, she wondered if Maura sensed it was coming. Perhaps she needed the same excuse for freedom and honesty that Jane did.

They both overindulged that evening. They ate dinner underneath the stars, on the side of a small Paris street, surrounded by cigarette smoke, and small tables crammed close together. They laughed too loud and found reasons to touch hands across the table. When a small band started playing, Jane used it as an excuse to scoot in close and whisper hoarse jokes in Maura's ear. Anything to make the woman smile.

The doctor leaned into the detective when they left the restaurant. Jane was drunk but alert enough to get them back to their suite. Alert enough to reconcile the heavy feeling in her chest. It hurt so bad that night, she swore she couldn't breathe.

"I think I drank too much," Maura said in a whisper when they entered their room. "In fact, I may be inebriated."

Jane flipped on the lights with a smile, watching as the doctor kicked off her heels in the sitting room. Only the former medical examiner of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts could manage to make her slurred words and drunken explanation sound scientific. Jane left briefly to get her friend a glass of much needed water, but by the time she returned, Maura was gone.

"Maur?"

"I'm in here," she called gently.

That night Jane hesitated. She'd never hesitated to enter her friend's bedroom before. Not in Boston. And not before that night in Paris. Suddenly she was cautious and shy, maybe even a touch embarrassed. Her cheeks warmed like a nervous teenager's as she approached.

"How are you feeling?" Jane asked. Her voice was extra hoarse from drinking. She carefully set the glass of water on the nightstand where a small lamp glowed. It was the only source of light in the room.

Maura lingered in front of her dresser, barely illuminated. She was staring in the mirror, holding her wavy, strawberry blonde locks above her neck with one hand. Jane would remember the silky, cream dress she wore that night. The way it hugged around every curve and dipped low on her back, revealing smooth, tempting skin.

"Can you help me with my necklace?" she asked.

"That wine really got to you, Dr. Isles," Jane chuckled.

Laughter was the only thing that could keep the detective distracted from her racing heart. She refused to look at Maura in the mirror as she came up behind her friend, worried that the woman would see she was blushing. Jane's fingers trembled as she reached for the clasp of the necklace.

"You haven't taken to sulking, have you?" Maura asked suddenly.

Jane's nose wrinkled in confusion. "What?"

"They don't have your cheap beer here," she smiled. "I mean, I suppose they do for the tourists but I do appreciate you indulging me."

Jane shook her head, put at ease by Maura's voice. She was about to remove the necklace, her fingers still wrapped on the clasp, grazing the nape of the doctor's neck. But she waited. Something in her froze and she couldn't get herself to move again. Not without letting go of what tormented her.

"Jane? Are you all right?" Maura asked. "I-I didn't mean anything by…"

The doctor spun around before Jane finished removing her necklace, finding herself just a few inches away from the taller woman. She stumbled slightly, still uneasy on her feet from the wine and Jane gently steadied her. Maura noticed her brown eyes were darker than normal. They looked almost black in the dim light. They didn't blink. They just stayed stuck on Maura's face.

"Jane? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Nothing's wrong," Jane said. She kept her scarred hand around Maura's bicep. The woman was unbearably stunning and the detective decided right then that she would never let go. "I have to tell you something."

Maura's heart sank and a frown pulled down on her plump lips. The sound of Jane's voice, her intensity and withdrawn nature filled her with apprehension. Perhaps that's why she'd over done it on the wine. She'd noticed Jane acting differently for days. She worried she'd done something wrong, or even worse; her friend had picked up on how she truly felt and was no longer comfortable staying in Paris.

"Jane…" Maura repeated. It was all she could say. Nothing else would suffice. She was afraid to ask, afraid to say anything more.

"I don't want to mess this up," Jane said. She didn't intend to blurt it out or jump into the middle of her confession but at least she'd started.

"You're not messing anything up," Maura replied.

"We've been through so much together. And you mean everything to me," Jane told her. Her voice cracked. She was still holding onto Maura's arm. They were still inches apart. And suddenly the heat between them became noticeable. It made breathing hard but intoxicating all at the same time. Jane could smell the doctor's sweet comfort as she stared down at her.

"You mean everything to me too, Jane."

"No," she cut her off, shaking her head. She didn't need reassurances. She needed her confession. "Maura, when you said you were leaving for Paris, I could hardly stand it. And I know I decided to go to Quantico, but I can't imagine life without you. And when I realized that, I followed you here – how crazy is that? Isn't that strange? Isn't that-that…"

"You love me," Maura cut off her rambling. In an instant she was sober and commanding. The same genius of a woman who instilled fear in the most brilliant scientists and brutal detectives. Jane nearly faltered but Maura grabbed her free hand with her own. "You love me, Jane. And I love you. And it's always been this way."

Jane carefully took her other hand from Maura's arm and wrapped it around the soft hand that was clenching on her own. A lump built in her throat.

"It's more than I love you, Maura," she whispered.

The doctor didn't say it, but Jane could hear it in her head. That sultry, soft voice that sent her over the edge, whispering _I know, Jane. _But there were no more words. Just feeling or the lack thereof. Jane's toes were numb, her stomach was light and warmth spread from her groin to her fingertips.

But in all the weakness she still had control. Enough wherewithal to nearly lunge into Maura. The detective didn't need to reach far. She must have moved her face hardly an inch forward when Maura's warm lips pressed against her own.

The simple touch sent Jane to near ecstasy. It was better than any first kiss, better than anything else she'd ever felt. And in an instant, she wanted more. She wanted everything. Her lips stayed hooked to Maura's as though it were a final life line. They parted only briefly for air and then they were linked back together again. Maura was just as enthralled. Her hands reached first, clinging to Jane's strong back. The detective brought a hand to the side of the woman's face and Maura gave a gentle moan.

When they released again they were panting for breath. They stared at each other in awe, desire, and terror. But the feeling was more intense. It was too strong to be ignored now that they'd officially crossed the line. Now that they had a small taste of how good it could possible feel. Despite her weak knees and desperation for another touch of Maura, Jane restrained herself.

"Are you all right?" she asked

Maura's response was neither poised, thought-out, or scientific as almost all other actions and reactions in her life were. She simply moved forward, her eyes only on Jane's lips, her hands rushing forward to take the detective's firm jaw into her grasp. This time she slipped her tongue into the woman's mouth, desperate for a taste of what she'd spent years imagining. Jane mirrored the movement, exploring Maura's mouth and lips with the same repressed vigor.

It was hard to know who led them to the bed but suddenly they were there. The next time Jane came up for another breath she was hovering above Maura on the thick comforter, their abdomens pressed together, her thigh pressed between her legs as she straddled the doctor. The detective's senses overwhelmed, her body coursing with heat and anticipation.

She kissed Maura everywhere she could. Her cheeks, her neck, her forehead, and lips. She filled her hands with the woman, her scarred palms wrapping around the doctor's breast, then her stomach, and suddenly without thinking, Jane grabbed the top of her thigh. All the while Maura panted and sucked on Jane's lips, pulled at her shirt and ran nails across her shoulders. She was just as blind and absorbed as the detective. But before the woman's hand could reach the spot of most erotic tension, Maura swiftly grabbed it away.

"Wait," the doctor said. She could barely breathe. Her face was hot and it took everything in her to stop her body from writhing underneath Jane. "Wait, just wait."

"I'm sorry," Jane stammered. Whatever passion fueled her quickly drained. Maura could see the fear flash across the detective's eyes. "I didn't mean to…"

Before the Jane could pull away, Maura grabbed her cheeks into her hands, keeping her in place.

"Everything's okay," she soothed. It was amazing that the simple phrase from Maura's lips could set Jane's world back on track. The doctor tucked a hanging piece of Jane's dark hair behind her ear. She traced her finger down her sharp jaw. "I just don't think we should do this right now. Not like this. Not yet."

"You don't want to."

"Of course, I want to," Maura laughed softly. "In fact, it's rather excruciating to stop. But I don't want you to wake up regretting something."

Jane bit on her lower lip and gave a slow nod. She slowly rolled off her friend, doing her best to ignore the sinking feelings that suddenly hit her. The harshness of reality that came with pulling out of their near lovemaking. Moments before Jane knew she couldn't live without Maura. Now she was afraid she wouldn't possibly be able to stand a life without another kiss, now that she knew how sweet it was.

"I can go to my room…"

"No," Maura said quickly. She grabbed Jane's hand, keeping her on the bed. "Stay with me. Don't leave me."

The words nearly broke Jane's heart. While Maura had played it cool, she could suddenly see the fear in her eyes. Jane scooted closer, resting her head on the mattress just a few inches away from Maura. Tears were forming in the doctor's gaze.

"What's wrong?" Jane asked.

"I just-I just," Maura's stammers caused a sharp pain in the detective's stomach. She suddenly felt like an awful person for creating such a precarious situation. But she avoided apologies. She didn't deserve Maura's forgiveness for ruining their friendship. "I just. I think I'm a little overwhelmed."

"I know, I shouldn't have -"

"I'm just overwhelmed by what I feel for you, Jane. And by how badly I've always wanted this. By how it feels to be with you. To really be with you; it scares me," Maura explained. A tear fell and Jane wiped it away, doing her best to ignore the lump in her own throat. "I love you so much that it terrifies me. Terrifies me to the point that I've been paralyzed for the last five years and I don't think I realized it until this moment."

"I understand," Jane whispered. It was all she could say. Fortunately her dark eyes conveyed more than her words could. Maura brought a hand forward and traced her fingers down Jane's lips.

"I want this," she told her. "I've always wanted this."

And suddenly the right words found her. Suddenly Jane understood. While she'd kept her head in the sand about her true feelings for Maura, the doctor had been wrestling with hers for years. And while not completely socially inept, Maura had been abandoned more than once. Surely coming so close to what she truly wanted was bittersweet.

"There's plenty of time," Jane said gently.

She kissed Maura with the slow, tenderness that their first embraces lacked. She could feel every inch of her lips and the warmth of her mouth in sweet purity. A softness that Maura deserved. When they pulled away, all was right again. The tears had dried and the doctor beamed lovingly at the detective as she had so many other times.

"Will you hold me tonight?" Maura sked.

"Every night you'll let me," she whispered.

Jane slammed on the brakes outside of the precinct. The sun was going down on Boston but it was still unbearably hot. She could see steam rise from the streets and kids riding bikes with bare feet. It was one of those miserable, humid summer days that left you drenched in sweat. Jane's shirt was already sticking to her back despite her car's air conditioning and she could feel the frizz build in her thick hair.

She slammed the door shut with a huff, carrying only the large plastic evidence bag with her. Her dark eyes were hidden behind a pair of sunglasses and she wore a pair of cropped navy chinos with her white button-down shirt. The sleeves were rolled past her elbows and the buttons loosened as low as they could go without being inappropriate. She'd neglected socks with her clean white sneakers. While no longer a detective with BPD, Jane wasn't about to show up in gym shorts and a t-shirt.

The air conditioning hit her full blast as she came through the front doors of the station. A pair of officers in short sleeved uniforms walked by but clearly recognized Jane, both tipping their hat in her direction. She nodded back, not remembering the faces but well-aware of her own reputation.

"Shelly?" Jane said when she reached the front desk. "They have you working as a reception?"

Before the young woman could answer, her bright eyes lit up at Jane. "Detective Rizzoli," she stammered. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm uh…consulting on a case," Jane replied. "What are you doing?"

"Desk duty mostly these days. It's not the most thrilling but it's safer than being out on patrol, now that Tom and I are expecting," Shelly explained. "I don't know if I ever want to be back out there now that I'm about to have kids. But I know I don't want to leave the force either."

Jane gave a sympathetic nod. "Of course."

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to go on about me. How long are you in town? Have you seen your mother, she just left the café."

"Thank God," Jane murmured. "I'm not sure how long I'll be here. But I need to see Sergeant Korsak…"

"Janie!"

She stiffened at the voice. For a moment she stayed still, staring at Shelly as though none of it were happening. But in a quick second her brother was at her side, nearly lifting her off the ground with a massive bear hug.

"Frankie, cool it," Jane chuckled. She gave him a squeeze back and rolled her eyes. "It's been a few months, gees."

"It's been fourteen months," Frankie replied.

"Well, I wasn't lost at war," she rolled her eyes.

The Rizzoli siblings gave Shelly a brief goodbye and slowly made their way towards the elevators. Frankie was the only person Jane had told about Paris. He was the only one she really kept in contact with aside from the weekly, painful calls she shared with her mother. She hadn't meant to cut him out in the process of her own pain but was glad that he'd welcomed her back with open arms. He always did.

"You drive straight here?" Frankie asked.

"Yes," Jane replied as the elevator doors opened. She shook her head as they stepped on together. "It's so damn hot, I don't know how you can stand that suit."

She playfully pulled at his tie and Frankie grinned. "Well, I'm no longer a floating detective but an official member of the homicide unit. I have to look the part."

"Nah, I just don't see it. The tie isn't convincing enough."

"You watch; one day you'll be calling me Captain Rizzoli," Frankie winked.

"Right," she chuckled. As the banter settled, they both stared ahead on the ride up, faces turning somber. "So, you have any leads?"

"None yet," he answered.

"How is she?"

Frankie frowned. "Hard to tell these days."

The doors slid open and in an instant, despite her lack of badge or a gun, Jane suddenly felt like the detective she once was. She clenched the evidence bag at her side a little tighter, ignoring the sharp sting that hit her hands. The detectives in the bullpen smiled and said their brief hellos but Jane hardly stopped for chit chat. They could tell she wasn't there for small talk. In fact, word had probably circulated to those that weren't even on the case.

"Welcome home," Vince Korsak greeted when she reached his desk. He kept the hug short and set a pair of knowing eyes on her face. "I'm glad you're back. Though I wish it wasn't under these circumstances."

"Me too," Jane muttered. "Frankie says you don't have any leads."

"No. But we do have one of Boston's finest detectives back with us," Korsak said.

"I'm not here to work the case," she replied. "Just to deliver this."

Jane held up the clear evidence bag and set it down on Korsak's desk. Through the plastic, the three of them looked at the large photo. It was a shot of Maura, taken with a large lens camera from a distance away. She was walking out of the police precinct. Blood was streaked across the front. Despite analyzing for the last 24 hours, it still made the hair on Jane's neck stand on end.

"They sent this to you in Quantico?"

"To my apartment," Jane nodded.

"We'll run prints and try to analyze the blood sample," Frankie said.

"Did they send her something similar?" Jane asked.

Korsak and Frankie exchanged looks. "It was much worse."

"What do you mean?" she asked. Her stomach was in knots. She discreetly leaned onto the desk to steady her trembling knees. It was one thing to threaten her, another to threaten the woman she still loved, but a completely other thing to terrorize Maura directly.

"Jane…"

"What is it?" she barked.

"They sent her a lock of hair," Korsak sighed.

Jane's face wrinkled in confusion. "What?"

"It was a lock of her hair," Korsak finished. "No prints, no blood…"

"Where is she?"

"Jane, do you think that's the best idea right now?" Frankie asked.

"Frankie, where the hell is she?"

"The morgue," Korsak replied.

Frankie gave a disgruntled sigh as his sister took off down the hall. Once out of sight from the bullpen, Jane nearly sprinted back toward the elevators. She smashed the button over and over until the light finally flashed above the door. The former detective bit on her nail as she hit the floor for the morgue.

She hadn't seen Maura for fourteen months. Fourteen aching months in which she'd stewed in her own depression and teetered on the edge of sanity. Fourteen months of staring at her cellphone, contemplating the call. Wishing to see that Maura had reached out first. Thinking on so many nights of just jumping in the car and driving straight to Boston. Instead, she willed herself to move on. She willed herself to believe that she didn't need the doctor. That they weren't meant to be and healing from the past was the only thing left to do. Now as the elevator doors opened to the morgue, Jane was more convinced than ever that she would never be able to let go of Maura Isles.

Jane hurried her way through the double doors of the sterile autopsy room, huffing for air as she searched the empty space. Her heart sank. The doctor was nowhere to be seen.

"Jane?"

Maura suddenly appeared out of her office. She was wearing a pair of black scrubs and her honey blonde hair was tied into a pony tail. She looked exhausted and her eyes were forlorn. To Jane, she was still beautiful, but clearly haunted.

The two women stayed motionless in their places, watching each other from across the vast, silent morgue. The space where they'd once shared so many cases. The morbid space where they'd fallen in love. And now, it was just empty.

"You came back home," Maura said.

Jane gave a careful nod. "I'm back home."


	2. Chapter 2

Jane woke up first. Maura was in her arms, her head resting on her chest, one leg tucked on top of the Jane's thigh. The detective breathed in the woman's soothing scent and studied her peaceful, sleeping face. They'd spent the night together many times before, even in the same bed, but never like this. This was something Jane only longed for in the restless evening hours. But with Maura lying against her, there was no restlessness or bad dreams.

She pressed a kiss to the doctor's forehead and watched as sunlight slowly crept into the hotel bedroom. She was so content she nearly fell back asleep when Maura stirred beneath her.

"You're awake," Maura whispered. She slowly raised her head off Jane's chest so she could look at her but kept an arm draped across the detective's stomach.

"Awake before you, believe it or not," Jane smiled. Her voice crackled out of her throat with sleep.

"I love your voice in the morning," Maura said unexpectedly.

Jane's eyes glistened with surprise. "You do?"

The doctor blushed but nodded.

"I suppose just your voice in general. Though it is extra rough and sexy when you first wake up," Maura replied. "Actually, most people's voices are deeper in the morning due to mucus build up on the vocal chords overnight. And if you sleep with your mouth open the so-called raspiness is augmented.."

"You could have stopped at sexy, Dr. Isles," Jane smirked.

Maura smiled back. The two fell into a comfortable but loaded silence. The new day meant they had to reconcile with what had happened the night before. The confessions, the kisses, and the ripe sexual tension that was already rebuilding as they faced each other on the bed. Their bodies were warm and close beneath the comforter. Jane found herself preoccupied with Maura's lips. Despite morning breath and messy hair, all she longed to do was drench herself in the doctor again.

"How did you sleep?" Jane asked. She nervously cleared her throat.

"You don't have to worry," Maura said.

The detective was taken back by the doctor's sudden confidence.

"I meant everything I said last night," Maura told her. "And I'm glad about what happened between us. But if you're not…"

Jane put her lips against Maura's before anything more could be said. They moved quicker than the night before. In an instant their arms were back around each other, their mouths moving across each other's in an easy rhythm. It was less desperate than he night before. The passion was just as intoxicating but they were less sheepish. They moved with purpose, hips clashing together, hands exploring curves and skin without hesitation.

"I want this," Jane whispered when they pulled away. "And I want you. I want all of you."

**..14 months later..**

They were back in the homicide bullpen. All four of them. Korsak, Frankie, Jane, and Maura. Just like the old days. The detective unconsciously rubbed her hands together, doing her best to will the ache out of her scars. Most of her focus however was consumed by not looking at Maura.

Their interaction in the morgue had been painful. They could hardly say more than a few sentences to each other. Not because they didn't want to but because their problems seemed insurmountable. Because they couldn't simply say the magic words to make it better. Too much time had passed. They only managed to make small talk. They avoided eye contact. They kept their distance. And then once confirming the other was "okay", Jane suggested they go upstairs to work on the case.

"We believe the threats were delivered around the same time," Korsak said. "The photograph that Jane received through USPS arrived a few days after the lock of hair was dropped off at the precinct for Maura."

"They dropped it off here?" Jane asked.

Maura gave a timid nod that Jane didn't see. Korsak sensed the tension and frowned, continuing to bridge the gap between them.

"Manila envelope with her name. No traceable DNA. Just the hair," he explained.

"How do you know it's Maura's?"

"I ran a DNA test," the medical examiner spoke up. Jane permitted herself to look over at Maura who greeted her with a somber glare. "It was a disturbing result to put it mildly."

Whatever resentment Jane held toward her was quickly replaced by sympathy. The image of Maura realizing that someone had sent her such an intimate threat made Jane's stomach sink. It also sent her into a protective fury that made her blind.

"How did they get the hair?"

"We think someone broke in and cut it while she was sleeping," Frankie explained. "It's the only thing that makes sense."

"Any signs of forced entry?" Jane asked.

Korsak shook his head. "No. We swept the entire house as soon as Maura confirmed the DNA on the hair," he said.

Jane glanced over at Maura, attempting to muster as much professionalism as possible. But she could feel her body tense before she even spoke. "Was there anyone at the house during the last year who would've had access to cut your hair while you were sleeping?" she asked.

The idea of someone being in Maura's house, potentially in her bed, filled Jane with new anger. She couldn't help but glare. She couldn't help but feel her jaw clench. Maura scowled back.

"Are you asking if someone spent the night?" the doctor asked.

"Yes."

"With me?"

"It's a simple question, Maura."

"I don't like what you're implying. That's personal…"

"We're trying to narrow down a suspect for God's sake," Jane nearly shouted. "I don't care who you sleep with!"

Maura's lower lip trembled discretely but she stayed composed by hurling back as much fury at the detective.

"There is no one Jane. There _was _no one. Is that what you want to hear?" Maura asked.

"Is it the truth?" the detective asked.

The doctor shook her head, swallowing back tears as she bolted up from her seat in the homicide bullpen.

"You're unbelievable," she said. Maura grabbed the plastic evidence bag with her photo, smeared in blood. "I'll be in the lab. I'm going to see if we can get a DNA match on this."

Korsak and Frankie stayed silent, staring at the floor, both clearly distressed but unable to settle the tension.

"Jane…"

"Vince, please," Jane cut him off. She gave a slow exhale, attempting to regain her composure. Attempting to remain unaffected by her exchange with Maura. Doing her best to pretend that it hadn't happened and that it didn't matter to her. "What's the plan here?"

Frankie rubbed the back of his neck and sat on the edge of his desk.

"We need to go back through your old cases. Anyone who would want to target you."

"Target me? They made the threat against Maura," she said.

"Right but they sent the photo to you. It indicates they're using her to get to you. Whoever this is knows that she's…" Korsak paused. "Knows that she's someone important to you."

Jane ignored what he was clearly alluding to and slowly got up from her seat at Frankie's desk.

"I'll get started now then," Jane said. "Let's go down to records, you guys can help me bring up my old case files."

While the detectives exchanged concerned looks, they knew better than to deny Jane Rizzoli. She may not have been an official detective on the force any longer, but she was still one of the country's strongest investigators. Its why she was training the FBI's finest. It's why despite the personal nature of the case, they knew she was probably the only one to close it.

They started with six boxes. They each carried two up from the basement, dropping them with a thump onto an empty desk in the bullpen. A uniformed clerk downstairs said he'd dig up the other boxes and roll them up on a cart later.

It was eight o'clock in the evening as the three of them began opening files, pouring through all the old cases. Frankie ordered Chinese and Korsak passed Jane a coffee with extra cream and sugar.

"Thanks," she said, glancing up from the file in front of her.

"A morbid walk down memory lane, huh?" Korsak asked. The sergeant slowly sat down in his office chair, leaning back. "Kind of strange seeing it all here. I never really thought of everything we've done until it was wheeled out in these boxes."

Jane nodded. "A lot of cases," she sighed. "We've been through a lot. All of us."

Frankie gave a grim nod, unconsciously picking up the action figure on his desk. A gentle reminder of Barry Frost. Jane wished he was there to help them. He would have known how to calm everyone down and bring the together. He would have known how to smooth things out between her and Maura. Frost always knew

"You ever miss it?" Korsak asked her.

"I wish could lie – but I miss it every day," Jane said. "Half the time I don't even know what I'm doing in Quantico. Teaching all these bright-eyed, book smart, entitled kids. They have no idea what's coming to them. What they'll see and feel when it finally happens…"

She trailed off, quickly becoming bitter at the reminder. The FBI Academy wasn't a bad place to be. In fact, it was a dream job for someone with her background and experience. Her students idolized her. And while she found many of them cocky and ignorant, they also respected her. But teaching them about investigative techniques was nothing compared to closing cases. Within the first month, she realized she'd never again feel the satisfaction of bringing justice to victims. She'd never feel the rush, the pain or struggle that came from the grisliest investigations.

Jane was born to be a detective and without it, it was as though she'd lost part of herself. Almost as painful as losing Maura, who she found to be another crucial part of her being. Sitting in the bullpen again was the closest she'd felt to herself in a year. And while she and Maura were hardly on speaking terms, seeing the medical examiner even in anger, was better than not seeing her at all.

"There's always a place for you here, Jane," Korsak told her. "You can always come back home."

Jane busied herself by pulling another thick file out of the box next to her. Dr. Charles Hoyt's name flashed across the pages. She slowly shuffled through photos of his murders, the weapons, and autopsy notes. All the memories of the man who'd tormented her for years. The ultimate cat and mouse game that still lost her nights of rest and caused her pain long after his death. The scars on her hands tingled.

She thought of Maura. That night in the hospital when Hoyt tried to kill her. It was worse than the moments in the basement during their first encounter. Worse than when Jane thought he may kill her. Worse than when he threw the scalpels through her palms. Watching him threaten Maura sent Jane over the edge. She knew then that she loved the doctor. That she would never let anything happen to her. And despite all that had transpired, even though Maura had broken her heart, Jane wasn't about to let anything happen to her again.

**..14 months earlier..**

They were naked, twisted in the sheets, hardly able to catch their breaths. They didn't look at each other right away, stares stuck on the ceiling above. Not because they were embarrassed or didn't want to, but simply for a moment to understand the true awe of their love-making. Jane had never been with a woman, but being with Maura came more naturally than sleeping with anyone else. There was no fear or hesitation; simply well-reciprocated, natural passion. It was like they'd been together their entire lives.

"That was…" Maura paused, pulling in another large gulp of air. "That was..."

"Really good," Jane chuckled.

"Incredible," Maura corrected.

The two women rested on their sides so they could face each other. Jane's eyes roamed back over Maura's porcelain skin, examining every freckle and curve that she hadn't given attention to in their sexual frenzy. Her body still twitched from the sheer power of her climax, sending tingles from her toes to her brain.

The doctor reached out, tracing a few gentle fingers over Jane's tan skin. The Parisian sun was making her Italian complexion look even darker. She watched as Maura's nimble hands ran over her shoulder, then her forearm, and finally down to her strong abdomen. Maura lingered a few fingers over the knotted scar near Jane's belly-button. She gave a small frown.

"You scared me so badly that day," Maura confessed. It felt like a decade ago but her green eyes still filled with agony. "I really thought I was going to lose you."

"I didn't mean to scare you," Jane replied.

"I know," Maura said, looking up at the detective's sympathetic face. "I suppose, its hard being in love with the hero sometimes."

"I'm not a hero," Jane rolled her eyes. "And in love? Since when?"

"I think that day," Maura replied. "When we met I was always attracted to you. I was always excited to see you, desperate to hear your voice or just be near you, more so than anyone else before. But I never connected the dots until you nearly died. I must have spent three days straight in that hospital hallway and screamed at half a dozen surgeons and residents at Mass General."

Jane laughed, suddenly imagining Maura bossing around the medical staff. She was the sweetest person Jane knew, but had the ability to be cold and aloof when necessary.

"Barry had to convince me to go home and eat more than once," Maura recalled. "I think maybe he knew."

"I think he knew I loved you too," Jane sighed. "When Hoyt came back, I didn't know where to turn except you. You were the only place that felt safe. I just wanted…I just wanted to wrap myself up in you."

"You make me feel safe too," the doctor said.

They kissed, slowly and assuredly, allowing their sweaty limbs to interlace and re-tangle themselves beneath the sheets. When they pulled away, they pressed their foreheads together, breathing lightly across the other person's cheeks.

"All that time and you never said anything," Jane muttered.

"You didn't either," she replied.

Jane pulled in another breath of Maura's sweet smell and a discreet shiver rolled down her shoulders.

"I didn't want to ruin what we had. I didn't want to ruin our friendship or scare you off," Jane confessed. Maura pressed a kiss to her firm jaw and snuggled in closer. Jane rolled onto her back, keeping a firm hold around Maura's waist as the doctor nuzzled her face beneath the former detective's neck. "What happens now Maur?"

The doctor smiled with her usual gentle confidence.

"How about breakfast?"

**..14 months later..**

"How you doing?"

Frankie's voice broke through Jane's memories. She was deep into another case file, probably her twentieth of the night. The legal pad next to her was messy with notes that only she could make sense of. She scoured for anything that raised red flags. Disgruntled family members, criminals recently released from jail, known associates and anyone who made violent threats against herself, Maura or the BPD.

"Fine," Jane told her brother. "I guess I never really thought of how many people might want to hurt me…or Maura. I mean, not until I sat down and wrote it all out like this."

He shook his head as he gathered up the empty Chinese food containers around the room. Korsak had finally called it quits, going home to Kiki. Frankie only lingered for his sister.

"We've been at it for awhile now," he said. "I think maybe we pick this up again tomorrow."

"Has it been that long?" Jane murmured. She glanced up at the clock. It was just after midnight. "You can go home, Frankie. I didn't mean to keep you."

"Well, I can't really leave you here since you're not an official member of BPD," Frankie smirked.

Jane rolled her eyes. "You're kidding."

"No," he said. "You know there are rules. And you're the one who turned in your badge…"

"Don't punish me for that," Jane grumbled. "I punish myself enough every day."

Frankie grabbed his blazer off his chair and jingled his car keys. "Come on. You can stay with Nina and I…"

"I'm not going to do that," Jane said.

"Oh, are you going to stay with Ma?" Frankie raised an eyebrow. Jane went rigid in her seat, her brown gaze widening. "You didn't tell her you're here."

"No," she mumbled. "I'm not ready to see her Frankie."

"She's going to kill you," he warned, folding his arms across his chest.

"You don't understand," Jane said. "Everything has been different since Paris. Ma and I aren't on the same page anymore. And I'm not about to walk into that conversation."

"She's old fashioned. She's different. We've talked a little and I think she's coming around. It was just a shock is all…"

"I'm just not ready, Frankie," she snapped. "Plus, she's still staying at Maura's guest house. Don't you think that's weird? They live a hundred yards from each other like it's nothing! My own mother…I'm not going over there."

"No one asked you to go over there, Janie," Frankie sighed. "Just stay with me and Nina. She'd love to see you. I want you two to bond anyway. She's going to be your sister-in-law in a few months."

"What about Maura?" Jane asked. She didn't want to, but it was still all she could think about. And the doctor's safety certainly came before Jane's feelings.

"What about her?"

"Does she have a protective detail? She needs to be under round the clock protection…"

"It hasn't really been necessary."

"What the hell do you mean?" Jane shouted. "There's a psycho out there, who snipped off a lock of her hair and has been her house…"

"She has two officers assigned to her, but she hasn't left the station," Frankie explained. "She's been sleeping in her office since the threat."

Jane's mouth opened in surprise. No words came, just a sharp inhale.

"I know it's…complicated between you both. But maybe now's the time to give her a break," Frankie said.

Jane got up from her seat, closing the case file on her desk. She grabbed her notepad and a box she had yet to analyze.

"Where are you going?" Frankie asked.

"I'll meet you at your place," Jane told him.

She could hear him sigh behind her but continued on her stubborn route. It was the second time she was going down to the morgue that evening. The second time she was running back to Maura Isles, in spite of everything in her that said not to. It felt like all the other times before Paris. The days of wondering down to the basement, just to be close to the doctor.

Jane waited outside Maura's office because she couldn't bring herself to knock. The light was on and knew that the doctor was most definitely not asleep. Not just because her life was in danger but because after years of working together, Jane knew Maura tended to fidget and grow restless during a big case. Just as Jane often did. It made her long for nights at the Dirty Robber or a bottle of wine at the doctor's house. The nights when they'd soothe each other's anxieties without so much as a single word. Being near each other was simply enough.

Jane finally brought herself to gently wrap on the door with the toe of her sneaker. She could hear a light rustling on the other side and the suddenly she was face to face with Maura. The medical examiner blinked in surprise, keeping a hand on the door as she looked Jane up and down.

"You're still here," Jane said, her voice coming out in its usual gravelly sound.

"So are you," Maura muttered.

"Can I come in?" Jane asked.

Maura simply widened the door and stepped aside. Jane carefully entered and placed the box of case files on the small coffee table near the couch.

"What are those?"

"Just a small fraction of the cases I had here in Boston," Jane said. She stayed on her feet, watching as Maura took a few steps closer. She still wore her black scrubs. Her hair was sagging in its ponytail. She looked nothing like the put together medical examiner that Jane once knew. "We've been going through all of them, trying to find a lead on who may want to settle a score with me."

"By threatening my life," Maura clipped. "I really don't like being collateral for your enemies."

"I don't like it either," Jane said. The statement hit her deeply. She hated putting the people she loved in danger with her career. Now a year out of the force and it still seemed she couldn't escape it. It's why in the darkest times of her loneliness, she felt she didn't deserve to be with anyone at all. She gave Maura a remorseful look. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For what I said upstairs," she answered. "I shouldn't have treated you that way. I suppose I'm just still..."

Jane stopped, unable to continue. She didn't want to cause Maura more pain.

"I know you're still hurt," Maura said. "I know Paris didn't end like either of us wanted."

"You never told me you came back to Boston," Jane told her. "Frankie had to tell me."

"You never called," Maura countered.

"You made yourself pretty clear that day," Jane replied. "I didn't think there was anything else to say."

Maura paced away, hands in the pockets of her scrubs as she leaned against her large desk. Her eyes were filled with sorrow as they met Jane's but she kept a stiff upper lip.

"What are you doing down here?" Maura asked.

"Frankie told me you've been sleeping in your office," she replied. "I'm worried about you."

"Well you don't need to worry…"

"Well I do, Maur," Jane said. "And whatever happened…whatever happened doesn't matter right now. It can't. I'm not going to leave you alone."

This seemed to strike a chord. Jane hadn't intended to address one of the medical examiner's soft spots but she knew as soon as the words left her mouth that what she said simultaneously hurt and assured Maura.

"You really don't need to do this," Maura told her.

"Do what?"

"Pretend you care. You have no obligation to be here," the doctor answered.

Jane narrowed her brow in anger. "You think I would pretend to care about you? I've never stopped caring about you. Don't forget that you're the one who broke my heart Maura," she replied.

"You don't think I know that?" Maura snapped. "I feel horrible about it every day."

"Then why didn't you call? Why didn't you try to make it right?"

"Because I was scared! I _am _scared," the doctor confessed. Maura pressed a hand to her forehead, hiding her distressed face from Jane's imploring eyes. "I'm sorry, Jane. I truly am. The last year has been…extremely difficult And I didn't know how to talk to you again. I just assume you hate me – as you should – and facing that rejection seemed much worse than never speaking to you again."

Jane glared, keeping her strong arms folded tightly across her chest. "Sounds pretty selfish."

"It is," Maura said, staring at the floor. "But I won't take anymore of your time or kindness. You should go."

"I'm not leaving you," Jane said again. "We can be angry at each other, but you still mean a whole hell of a lot to me. And I can't stand to see you like this."

The doctor did her best to maintain a strong front. It was difficult because in reality, Jane had done nothing wrong. But like so many times before, her presence stirred up so much emotion in Maura, that she cold hardly stand it. It was the same combination of love and anxiety that had caused her to back out of things in Paris. The same fear of abandonment that had plagued all of her relationships before. But ending those has never hurt near as badly as letting go of Jane.

"What are we supposed to do?" Maura asked.

Jane shrugged. What she wanted to do was squeeze Maura into a hug and never let her go. She wanted to kiss her again and taste what she'd been missing for fourteen months. But she retrained herself. She had to protect herself, the same way the doctor was determined to.

"You could help me go over these old cases," Jane suggested.

It was an olive branch. Another beginning – so similar to all the other beginnings. A dive back into their work as a team. The same place they started. Maura choked back the urge to cry and nodded her head, taking a few timid steps toward the cardboard box on the table. Jane sat on one side of the couch and Maura on the other. Together they reopened the cases that had shaped their start and would soon remake their future.


	3. Chapter 3

Maura woke up first. She was jarred initially, not expecting to find herself curled up on the cushions of her office couch, even though that's where she'd been sleeping for the last three nights. Her hazel eyes adjusted to take in a mess of papers and files on her coffee table. And then finally, as she lifted her stiff neck and turned, she realized Jane was sleeping next to her. The former detective was seated, her head limp against the top of the couch cushion, mouth ajar as she slept in the uncomfortable position. One of her long arms was still draped over Maura's back and the pillow where the doctor's head rested was against her left thigh. The doctor cringed and quickly laid back down, realizing she'd fallen asleep on Jane's lap.

It wasn't how she'd envisioned their reunion. Of course, over the last year, Maura was also convinced a reunion would never commence.

As Maura laid back against Jane's leg, staring up at the ceiling, her stomach tightened against the onslaught of memories. The last days of their time in Paris. Everything about their beginning had been sweet. Kissing Jane, holding Jane, loving Jane, was the easiest, most thrilling thing that Maura could remember. It's what she'd longed for in years of friendship. It's what she'd never had the courage to do until Jane caressed her that night.

The week that followed their first kiss was simple bliss. They continued all their normal activities. Restaurants, sight-seeing, whispers as they overlooked the city and plenty of laughter. But it was coupled with a new sweetness. Holding hands, the unrestricted kiss, and the meaningful glances – glances that were always there but could mean something now. They held each other every night, they eagerly exchanged _"I love yous"_, and moved from that first morning of lovemaking into long passionate afternoons and nights. They couldn't get enough of one another. They'd leaped from a first kiss to a full-blown relationship. Like two people who'd been dating for years. They developed it overnight.

And Maura had to stop it.

The pace, the fervor, and the closeness slapped the doctor with abrupt reality. One day she woke up in pure anxiety. Her heart wanted Jane. But her head, the rationality that had ripped her from every other relationship and intimacy, screamed at her to back away. They couldn't possibly make it work. It wasn't right. It wasn't normal. And Maura was convinced that ending it was the only thing to do.

A knock on her office door interrupted Maura's thoughts. She bolted to a sitting position and Jane gave a groan. The brunette snapped her mouth shut and looked around in surprise.

"Dr. Isles?" a nervous voice called on the other side.

"Coming," Maura managed. She cleared her throat and tucked her hair behind her ears. Her pony tail was gone but she still wore her scrubs. She was disgusted with herself and decided today would have to be the day she went home for fresh clothes.

Jane meanwhile stood and stretched, giving the doctor a heavy look. It conveyed everything they had yet to say to each other. Her dark eyes suggested that it would be a conversation to be had later. Maura gave her an understanding glance in return before going to the door.

"What do you need?" she asked the young man waiting in the hallway. He was BPD's newest lab technician. He'd only been on the job for two weeks and in her distraction and overall aloofness, Maura hadn't bothered to learn his name. In fact, since her break up with Jane and return to work, the medical examiner was far from the cheerful and friendly woman that so many used to know. Instead she was cold and mechanical – much like the person she was before meeting Jane.

"The blood results are in for the photo…"

Maura snatched it out of the man's hand before he could finish speaking.

"Jesus, Maura," Jane muttered.

The medical examiner looked over her shoulder at the sound of the scrappy voice. It still sent shivers down her spine.

"Who are you?" Jane asked the lab technician.

"Noah," he answered. "I'm new."

"Nice to meet you," she nodded. "I'm Jane…"

"Rizzoli, yes," Noah stammered. "Sorry, it's just…your reputation precedes you."

Maura felt herself lighten slightly as she listened to the exchange. Leave it to Jane to remind her how to be human. She quickly slid out the papers from the folder, her eyes flickering over the blood results. A warm mass moved behind her and she could feel Jane just inches above her shoulder, peering down at the same paper. She was fortunately too entrenched in the results to attribute her increasing heart rate to Jane's closeness.

"It's a 100 percent match," Noah said timidly.

"Olivia Denton," Maura read aloud.

"Holy shit," Jane said.

"What is it?" Noah asked.

"You're sure this is right?" the former detective snapped.

"Well, yes, it was matched to a sample taken four years ago from a crime scene…"

"Fuck," Jane cursed. She ripped the paper out of Maura's hand and paced away, pinching her brow.

"Jane," Maura scolded. She glanced back at the technician. "Thank you, Noah. You can go."

The young man watched Jane and the medical examiner out of sheer curiosity but finally left as soon as Maura shut the door on him. Maura turned around to find Jane seated back on the couch, her head in her hands. She hadn't expected the detective to react so dramatically.

"Talk to me," Maura said.

Jane slowly looked up, her eyes wide and alert. She ran a scarred hand through her messy brown hair.

"What does this mean? Does this mean she's alive?" Jane asked. "All this time?"

No longer consumed by her own insecurities and the weight of their relationship woes, Maura suddenly realized the implications of the results. She understood why Jane was in a state of despair. The medical examiner carefully came forward, taking a seat on the couch close to Jane, no longer concerned about the distance or what it meant.

"The blood on that photograph _was_ recent…based on the drying pattern and the fact that we were able to lift DNA so easily," Maura said carefully. Jane looked at her in a rare display of helplessness. "Of course, we can't confirm if she's alive at this moment. But I would say four days ago or whenever this photograph was sent, she was alive."

Maura hated the way her statement made Jane's shoulders slump. The detective appeared utterly defeated as she shook her head.

"In some ways, this could be considered a good thing. If she's alive…"

"We stopped looking for her. _I _stopped looking for her," Jane whispered. "Her parents held a funeral. We put a man behind bars because of my investigation."

The medical examiner didn't hesitate to put a comforting hand on Jane's back. She was spiraling into deep distress as the realizations continue to hit her. Olivia Denton's case affected Jane deeply four years ago. Especially since she couldn't bring the girl home. But the idea that she'd served false justice, appeared to shake her very perceptions of her work. Maura could see it across the woman's face and her heart ached with sympathy.

"We'll get to the bottom of this Jane," she encouraged. "There's still time to make it right."

She could feel Jane relax ever so slightly against her hand. She longed to soothe her further. To wrap her arms around her and nestle her face into her neck. She longed to let her know that she had her and she wasn't letting go. Maura's heart was racing again as their gazes melted into one another's.

Before Maura could make a move, Jane cleared her throat and pulled away.

"We should get this up to Korsak and Frankie," she decided. She straightened her wrinkled shirt and avoided the doctor's eyes by looking at the results again.

"Of course," Maura agreed, though her thoughts were still wandering as she studied Jane. Remembering everything she'd missed about the woman. Even now as she moved just a few feet away, Maura already missed her smell and touch. Nothing mattered, nothing could outweigh the desire she had to pull Jane close to her. And since she couldn't, a dull, mean ache settled in her chest and stomach.

"I'm sorry for falling asleep down here," Jane muttered. Her brown eyes flickered up to meet Maura's. "I didn't mean to confuse things or…"

"It's okay, Jane," the doctor said with a discreet frown.

The former detective bit on her lower lip and nodded her head. Before allowing anymore time to pass between them, she briskly moved for the door.

"You coming?" Jane asked.

"I'll be up in a moment," Maura replied, watching as the door slammed shut.

**..14 months earlier..**

Jane knew there was something wrong at dinner.

The day had gone well enough. In fact, the entire week since that first kiss was near perfection. They hadn't left each other's sides. And they didn't want to. Any second apart was more torture than it had ever been before. For that they were constantly holding hands, sharing sweet whispers, and spending long hours in bed.

But something changed that day and Jane couldn't figure out what.

She'd gone for her usual run that morning, down the narrow city streets of Paris that were now familiar and starting to feel like home. She recognized the restaurant workers, rolling out their tables and vendors preparing their goods to attract tourists, cigarettes poking out of their mouths while they went about their work. They gave Jane nods of approval as she went on her way, shoes bouncing along the concrete. The sun was slowly rising above the horizon, leaving everything cool and quiet, except for the constant pounding of her quick steps.

Maura was in the hotel, working away on her book. Jane was always excited to get back to her. To find the doctor immersed in her writing, glasses on the bridge of her nose in the sitting room, with a cup of coffee and a pastry and papers scattered all over the coffee table. Her green eyes twinkled and her smile spread wide the moment Jane came through the door. She immediately kissed her and Maura wrapped loving hands around Jane's neck, ending the first long kiss with sweet, short pecks before they pulled away.

They went to Lac Daumesnil for a picnic. They loved the city and the energy but it was nice to be in nature. It was one of the things they both missed about home. Maura packed cheese and meats and a bottle of her favorite wine. They took books and a blanket and after a brief boat ride on the lake, they cuddled up on the shore. They held hands, they kissed, and listened to the ripples of the water.

By the time they returned to the hotel that afternoon, they could hardly keep their hands off each other. In an instant, they were in bed – the same bed they'd been sharing for the last week. They moved easier with each other. They knew the other person's body. They knew where to touch. In so many ways, they were one. Maura climaxed first, her chest damp in the heat, her body trembling for several seconds against Jane as she clung to the detective's strong arms. The doctor's moans and pleasure brought Jane to such an edge that it hardly took any time for her to achieve orgasm under Maura's tender, nimble fingers. Soon they were asleep in each other's arms, the doctor pulling Jane's head of thick hair onto her stomach, holding her as if the woman were her personal sleeping comfort.

But something changed at dinner.

Maura was quiet and distant. She hardly made eye contact. She fiddled, stammered, and it felt as though the last week had never happened. It put knots in Jane's stomach. They didn't stay for dessert or drinks. And when they retired to the room, the silence continued.

"I thought I'd find you out here…"

Jane stepped onto the balcony with bare feet, enjoying the gentle but warm breeze that moved across the city. Maura looked up from her laptop. She'd been writing since they'd finished their meal, leaving Jane to pack her things. She was set to return to Quantico in two days. Maura stared at the detective but couldn't bring herself to speak. Jane leaned against the railing, the lights of the city glowing behind her. The Eiffel Tower's silhouette was visible from their room, but crickets chirped on the grass beneath; a calming juxtaposition.

"What's going on?"

"What do you mean?" Maura asked.

Jane had to keep herself from rolling her eyes. She folded her arms across her chest, a subconscious indicator that she was now on the defensive.

"You were quiet at dinner. You've hardly said three sentences to me. Did I do something to upset you?"

"No," Maura said quickly. "You haven't done anything wrong."

"Then what's with the silent treatment?" she asked.

Maura frowned, her eyes pulling back in subtle hurt. She slowly shut her laptop. The wind blew her hair in a way that made Jane's breath stop in her throat. She was stunning. But the detective also knew, something awful was coming.

"What happens now?" Maura asked gently.

"Well, when I asked that, you said breakfast," Jane smirked. She was desperate to lighten the mood. Desperate to take away that foreboding look on Maura's face.

"You leave for Quantico in two days," the doctor whispered.

Jane's brow furrowed. "That was always the plan. I have a job waiting for me…"

"And then what?"

"I-I-I guess I don't really know. I just thought we'd figure something out."

"Figure something out? Jane, that isn't very realistic."

"What?"

"When you go to teach and the FBI Academy, what happens to us?"

"What do you mean, what happens? I figured eventually you'd leave Paris. You haven't even told me what your plans are. You could do anything you want. You could write anywhere you want. Hell, you could teach at the Academy," Jane said. "Come with me. We could have a life there and start over and…"

"I don't want to go to Quantico, Jane."

"Then I'll go back to Boston. I already miss being a detective, anyway," she decided easily.

"No," Maura said frantically. She shook her head, standing up from her seat.

"What? Why?"

"I won't have you change your life for me like that."

"It's not your choice, Maura," Jane replied, her voice scrapping out harsher than she intended. "And I'm doing it as much for me as I am for you. I love you and I want to keep being with you."

"And then what?" the doctor shot back. "Are you going to tell your family? Your mother? What will they say? You've known all this time about your feelings for me and you never told them…"

"Because I didn't think there was a chance we'd even be together," Jane stammered.

"And now that we are?"

"I don't know. Eventually I'll have to talk to Ma…"

"Eventually? It will destroy her and her Catholic sensibilities…"

"Okay, okay, that's for me to deal with," Jane cut her off. Her brown eyes were wide now at Maura's clear aggravation. She wasn't expecting this from the doctor. She knew that Maura was upset but now Jane felt she was stuck in front of a broken dam. Every insecurity, every anxiety was on the forefront. The detective had dealt with a small fraction of it before but never like this. "Maura…"

"This isn't right," Maura cut her off. "We jumped into this without thinking and it's just going to hurt both of us."

"Where is this coming from?" Jane asked. She stepped forward, placing her scarred hands on Maura's shoulders. She did her best to exude patience but in reality she was growing more fraught with each passing moment. "We don't need to complicate things. You love me and I love you and we'll figure things out."

"I don't want to just figure things out! Things don't work like that!" Maura nearly shouted. She pulled away, starting a quick pace on the balcony. "What are we supposed to do? Just go back to our lives in Boston and be together?"

Jane paused momentarily but then nodded vigorously with an eager disposition. "Yes!" she yelled. "Yes, that's exactly what we're supposed to do. And it might be hard or scary at first but we have each other. And we've never let the other person down."

"But it's never been like this!" Maura countered. "We've never let each other down when we were just friends but what about now? It's only been a week Jane…"

"It's been five years!" Jane barked. She'd managed to remain patient throughout most of Maura's breakdown but now she was just as heated and desperate. She could feel they were on the edge of the end and she wasn't about to go down without a fight. "You said it yourself. We've been in love with each other for five years. And I'm not leaving you Maura. I don't want to leave you."

"You can't promise that. Things will be different after this, Jane. We're safe here in Paris. We've been in our own little world, with no one to judge us or to force us to face reality!"

"I can face reality," she said back. "I can do this, Maura. I'm ready. Are you?"

For the first time since their fight started, Maura stopped pacing. Her cheeks were red with emotion and she looked so lost that Jane had to fight everything in her being to not take the woman into her arms.

"I don't know," Maura whispered.

The response hit Jane like a roundhouse kick to the chest. Of all the gunshot wounds, broken bones, cuts and bruises, it struck her with the most pain. She could hardly breathe. Perhaps she'd been naïve during the last week. Naïve to think it could work between them.

"Why are you doing this?" Jane asked. She didn't mean to accuse the doctor, but she seemed to be purposely sabotaging them.

Tears built in Maura's eyes. Her throat constricted with oncoming sobs. She didn't want to end it. She didn't want to say goodbye. But she had a stronger desire to not get hurt. And no matter how much she trusted Jane, no matter how much she loved her, she couldn't convince herself that it wouldn't implode like everything else.

"I love you Jane, but I can't do this," Maura nearly whimpered. She pushed past the tears in her throat and pulled in a slow breath. "I think it's best if we just leave this here. Just leave this in Paris."

Now Jane was the one in tears. They came up quickly and uncontrollably. They spilled down her sharp cheeks without a sound. She sniffled and wiped a few away.

"That's it? What was this?"

"I don't know," Maura swallowed hard. A plump tear fell and she shook her head. "I'm sorry, Jane. I really am."

"You didn't even try…"

"Because it would only end like this," Maura cried. "We jumped into things without thinking of the consequences."

"No, no, no," Jane cut her off. She was fierce now, even with the tears. Her jaw was tight and her dark eyes certain. "You don't get to say that. We didn't jump into things – it's always been like this. You're ending it because you're scared."

Maura stayed still, her gaze somehow capturing a combination of sadness and hate.

"You love me, Maura," Jane continued. "You love me and I love you. That's all that matters. That's more than most people have. Tell me that it doesn't mean something. Don't give up on this."

Jane knew it was over when Maura didn't respond right away. The stars hung high against the dark sky. The city was quiet behind them. But suddenly as the world cracked open beneath them, Paris was no longer their sanctuary but just another place. Another horrible place.

"I can't," Maura whispered.

The doctor left the balcony and another gust of wind followed her out. They didn't share a bed that night. And Jane caught the next flight out of Paris.

**..14 months later..**

Maura followed the laughter out of the elevator. It brought her joy and dread. She suddenly felt like she was at boarding school again, left out of some joke. And as the social anxiety built, she became more convinced that it was a joke about her.

The gang was gathered again in the homicide bullpen and despite the seriousness of the case and threats, they were smiling. Frankie and Korsak wore fresh clothes and Nina was there, beaming with an engagement ring on her finger. And there in the middle of all of them was Jane, still looking ravishing though she wore the same outfit from the night before.

"Good morning, Dr. Isles," Nina spotted her first. "I figured you could use some coffee."

"Thank you, Nina," Maura managed, taking the warm cup from the woman. The upbeat tone of the conversation seemed to dwindle with the doctor's arrival and she decided to stay close to Nina. She sipped on the black coffee – something she usually tried to avoid, but was desperate for distraction.

"Jane told us the news," Korsak sighed in her direction. "We're all still having a hard time wrapping our heads around it. Olivia Denton alive…"

"She's not necessarily alive," Maura said. The eyes of the room seemed to die on her face and she quickly regretted speaking up. She cleared her throat. "I mean to say the results of course cannot prove that she's alive or dead. Just that it was her blood on the photograph."

"Of course," Frankie spoke up, coming to her rescue. Even once he learned of the break-up, Frankie was surprisingly supportive of Maura. In fact, it was as though nothing changed. He treated her with as much kindness as he had before. "We're calling in Olivia's parents and all the players from the original case. And we'll have to interview Grant Swindell."

Jane had been silent and still since Maura's arrival. But she bowed her head at the mention of Grant Swindell. He was the man she hunted for months and put behind bars for Olivia's supposed death. He was a known sexual predator and they'd found Olivia's blood, clothes and backpack at his house. But with confirmation of the girl's livelihood – at least that she'd been alive since Grant's arrest – represented a job incomplete for Jane Rizzoli. Or even worse, a wrongful arrest.

"In other words, we're officially reopening my case," Jane sighed.

"It happens," Korsak said. "It doesn't mean you did bad work."

"We'll see," Jane raised her eyebrows. She took a sip on the coffee that Nina brought her. "All we know is someone is out there. Someone who has been near Olivia. And someone who wants to hurt, Maura."

Her brown eyes flickered in the medical examiner's direction and she couldn't bring herself to look away. Maura gave her a sympathetic smile. The urge to comfort Jane struck her again, much like it had in the morgue just moments ago.

"You two should go home for a bit. Get a shower, clean clothes," Frankie raised his eyebrows.

"Screw you," Jane scoffed.

"Olivia's parents are flying in separately. They won't be here for a few hours. And we're not going to interview Grant without you," Korsak assured. He looked to Maura. "And I'm worried about you…"

"I'm fine, Korsak," Maura said unconvincingly. "But I probably could freshen up."

"Take your protective detail with you," Jane ordered.

Maura nearly glared at her demand but also understood its caring roots.

"You going to Ma's?" Frankie asked his sister.

Jane stayed silent and Nina quickly cut in.

"I already made you a key to our apartment. And the futon is all made up for you," Nina said quickly. She was obviously eager to please from the coffee to the jingling key she now offered her future sister-in-law. Despite her urge to convey disdain, Jane understood the gesture – she also wasn't about to get on Frankie's bad side. He seemed to be the only one who had her back.

"Thank you, Nina," Jane managed as she took the key. "I'll be back in an hour."

"Take your time," Korsak instructed. "Both of you…"

Jane gave him a discreet glare before leaving the bullpen. Maura slowly followed behind, not speaking a word until they got in the elevator.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

The former detective punched the button for the lobby and gave a disgruntled sigh.

"I don't like this," Jane muttered.

"You know this isn't your fault."

"I don't feel like that right now," she snapped. The elevator doors slid open and they strode out together. Two officers immediately began following Maura in the lobby. They didn't say a word, they simply trailed her. Jane was annoyed but also grateful. She wasn't in a place to protect Maura but she'd be damned if anything happened to her. She glanced to the doctor before they reached the door. "You'll meet me back here?"

The question filled the medical examiner with some hope. Jane's voice resounded with familiar kindness and loyalty, as if to suggest they were in it together. Just like before Paris. Maura gave a slow nod.

"Of course," she whispered.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli."

The voice cut across the entire BPD lobby. Officers who had nothing to do with the impending family drama stopped in their tracks. Angela Rizzoli stood rigidly outside the station café, staring down her daughter in disappointment. There was no escape for the former detective.

"Fuck," she muttered.

**..30 years later..**

"Have you seen mom?"

AJ Rizzoli resented the question and immediately felt her face fall into a scowl. It was bad enough she was sitting in a hospital cafeteria, picking at a flavorless salad, but now her aggravation grew. She stabbed a tomato with her plastic fork.

"I haven't yet," she confessed. "I've only been here a few hours. I came straight here from the precinct. For some stupid reason…"

The man sitting across from her flashed a wide, dimpled grin. He was wearing light blue hospital scrubs and a stethoscope hung around his neck. A few pens were tucked into the pocket of his top and a hospital ID badge was clipped to the front. His photo and name were printed across the plastic: _Dr. James Rizzoli._

"How was uncle Frankie?" he asked her.

"He was good," she shrugged. "It'd been a long time since I'd seen him."

"I'm sure he's glad you're back home," James replied. "And I know mom will be too. If you ever tell her…"

"I'll tell her, okay? I'm going to the house after this," AJ assured. "I can't say it will go well or that she'll be happy. She's so damn stubborn. I don't think she's even talked to uncle Frankie since…"

AJ stopped, unable to bring herself to say the words. It'd been ten years, but the pain was still fresh. James' large brown eyes filled with knowing sympathy.

"It's hard for her, Allie," he said. He was the only one who could get away with calling his sister by that nickname. They were best friends. They'd lived their lives together for as long as they could remember.

"Easy for you to say," she winked, attempting to restore some humor to the atmosphere. "You're her favorite."

"I'm not her favorite!"

"And you're just like her," AJ continued. "I swear, I'm the one who was adopted, not you."

"Well, if I wasn't black and you didn't look like mom's spitting image, I might entertain the idea," James chuckled. They both laughed, quickly falling into old habits. AJ and James had kept in contact when she joined the NYPD. He even came to visit when his residency program allowed. Being close to her brother again was a large part of AJ's decision to come to Boston.

"So it's all settled then?" he asked. "They're going to let you be a detective?"

"Finished the last of the paperwork today. I'll get my gun and badge and a partner on Monday," AJ nodded.

James turned serious for the first time since she'd arrived at Mass General.

"Does uncle Frankie know the real reason you're at BPD?" he asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Don't play dumb with me," James grunted. "I'm basically your twin. And I know when you're lying. And I know what you're going to do now that you're here."

AJ Rizzoli stayed still as stone and quiet. It was a countenance that was easily recognized in her mother, Jane. Her pointy jaw went firm but she never took her gaze away from her brother's. It was as if she were daring him to proceed.

"Don't open the Denton case," James said calmly. "You saw what it did to them. It nearly destroyed them both. Mom isn't going to want you to do this."

"I have to James," AJ told him. "I have to finish it. For them, for us. And I'm not going to let anyone stop me."

* * *

_Thanks for sticking with me through another long installment! The good news is we're all caught up from Paris. There will still be some time jumping between the "present day" and the grown up Rizzoli children. Also I promise, this is a Rizzles story. It's a little painful now but we've turned something of a corner. Sometimes it has to get worse to get better. All reviews are appreciated! Also I have to say, I always picture Missy Peregrym (Rookie Blue, FBI) as AJ Rizzoli. Thanks for reading :)_


	4. Chapter 4

Olivia Denton went missing the day after Thanksgiving. Jane remembered because Angela had been exasperated when her daughter ran out on what was supposed to be a family holiday weekend. Frankie looked at her with envy, offering to join the case, when the detective slipped out, Maura by her side. There was no body and no reason for the medical examiner to go but like so many other times, she instinctually joined Jane's side.

The Dentons were a nice couple with two other kids. The wife, Linda, was hysterical and her husband Kurt lived in a state of denial those first twelve hours. Olivia was their youngest child. She was ten years old. She'd asked to go visit her best friend who lived down the street – a walk she'd made nearly a hundred times since she was in kindergarten. It was a small, blue collar, Boston neighborhood. Everyone knew everyone's business. In fact, that afternoon, the entire Denton family was on the lawn despite the freezing temperatures with a collection of neighbors for an annual holiday game of touch football. Linda even watched Olivia on her walk until she rounded the corner out of sight. She should have reached her friend Madison's house just a few minutes later. But Olivia never showed.

When Jane and Maura arrived at the neighborhood before sunset, uniformed cops were already canvasing the neighborhood. They went door to door, flashing a photo of Olivia provided by her mother. It was starting to snow but most neighbors were on their porches, watching the scene of patrol cars and gathering outside the Denton house. Jane was irritated by the mob tendencies of the close-knit community as they milled about and tried to help; they were contaminating a possible crime scene.

She spoke with Olivia's parents. Linda was in tears and Kurt did his best to stay stoic. He kept asserting that their daughter would show up. But a mother's instinct made Linda certain that someone had kidnapped the little girl. And within 24 hours, it was clear someone had indeed taken Olivia Denton.

When Korsak showed up they gathered more photos and clothes to pull DNA from. They notified the appropriate authorities and the media. Olivia Denton's sweet smile was plastered on every television and newspaper. About a hundred tips came in from around the Boston area. In most cases, the tips were nonsensical. Psychics and the normal round up of crazies called, insistent that they knew where Olivia was. But it was one tip in particular that helped turn the investigation on its head. Two people insisted they'd seen the little girl peering out from the back of a dark green Jeep. The same kind of car registered to Grant Swindell.

Within the first day during their search for Olivia, Jane and the team tracked down every known child predator in the area. Grant had been let out six months prior after serving time for child pornography. He lived four blocks away from the Denton's. He was skittish and quiet when they first interviewed him. Grant claimed to have been with friends for the holiday and not home when Olivia disappeared. Before they could confirm his alibi, the tip about his car came in. And when Jane and Korsak went to serve a search warrant, he was already packing a bag.

Grant fired a warning shot past the detective's ear that afternoon when they knocked on the door. He then barricaded himself, threatening to commit suicide in a five hour standoff before SWAT finally moved in. He cried hysterically all the way to the station and asserted his innocence through countless interrogations. Jane and everyone else at BPD was certain of his guilt. And when they dug up bloody clothes belonging to Olivia Denton in his attic, Grant was charged and convicted with kidnapping, murder, and attempted murder for the bullet he nearly put in Jane's head on the day of his arrest.

They never found Olivia's body but she was presumed dead. Grant never gave a location and constantly pleaded his innocence. After a year, the Dentons finally decided to find closure. They had a funeral for Olivia. Jane went to the service – Maura held her hand. Maura stayed up with her during those sleepless, guilty nights. Maura helped her to get past a case that never seemed to end.

And now it was back.

"When were you going to tell me you were back?"

Angela's scrappy voice pulled Jane from the thoughts of the case that couldn't stop clogging her mind. She was sitting with her mother at a corner table of the café, morning summer sun streaming through the cracked blinds. Officers were lining up for coffee and hustling through breakfast, but Angela's voice and face came through clear among all the colors and noise.

"I just got here Ma," Jane whispered. "I was going to tell you after I got settled."

"You're here for a case?" Angela asked.

Jane was taken back by her mother's calm demeanor. She expected tears or shouting but instead the matriarch stayed stoic. Jane gave a slow, guilty nod.

"So are you back to be a detective?"

"I'm just helping with this case. I'll go back to Quantico after it's finished," Jane replied.

"Oh," Angela said in clear disappointment.

Jane cleared her throat, though her voice cracked as she raised her eyebrows. "What? I thought you'd be relieved. You don't want me to be a detective anyway…"

"You know, that's the problem Jane. You've always assumed you know how I think and feel about your life," Angela snapped.

"You going to tell me I'm wrong?" Jane asked. "That things haven't been…"

Angela raised an eyebrow. "Haven't been what?" she asked. "Strained between us? That it's not clear to me you don't want to speak to me, let alone see me…"

"That's not true, Ma," Jane denied but she knew she was making an unconvincing argument. Again, she expected tears from the usually emotional Angela but her mother appeared angry instead. That was much worse.

"What did I do, Jane?"

"You know," she scoffed in response.

"When you told me about what happened in Paris…"

"You said you were worried something like that would happen," Jane growled. "That you had your fears all along about Maura and me…"

"And then you told me you didn't want to talk about it," Angela cut in.

"Can you blame me?" Jane nearly shouted. "It was just like everything else. Just like me choosing to be a cop, just like me not being married or giving you grandchildren or moving to Quantico…why would I want to talk about those things when all you express is disappointment?"

Angela's brow furrowed and her lip tightened against the threat of tears or an outburst. Her brown gaze went shiny but she remained strong.

"That's where you're wrong and where you've always been wrong, Janie. You could never be a disappointment," Angela whispered. She shook her head. "I feel like I don't know you anymore."

Jane lowered her head, doing her best to remain patient with her mother. She wanted to scream at her again but instead she kept her voice at an easy pitch. "Because I'm gay."

The tears fell now and Angela silently wiped them away. Jane waited for what she always feared. She braced herself for the condemnation she knew she'd receive for finally embracing who she was. But it didn't come. Instead Angela reached across the table, grabbing her daughter's hands.

"It's not because you're gay, Jane. I'm your mother. That could never change anything," Angela told her. "I don't recognize you because you're suddenly this shell of a person – of who you are."

Fresh pinpricks of emotion rose on Jane's skin. A lump quickly filled her throat and she bit on her lower lip.

"Since you were a little girl, you've always known what you wanted and gone after it. Whether its this crazy job or taking care of our family or being fiercely loyal to your friends – to Maura especially; you've always found a way to make things happen despite the worst odds," Angela went on, a tear streaming down her cheek. Her words were full of conviction and encouragement that Jane rarely saw. It made her want to cry right there in the café. "But suddenly you're not that person, Janie. I can see. I can feel it. And the daughter I raised, the daughter who accomplished more than I could have ever dreamt of or wanted, is gone. You've given up Jane and I don't understand it. You gave up on the thing you want the most."

"I didn't give up, Ma," Jane whispered. She was crying now, though she didn't even realize it until the tears fell onto the table. She squeezed her mother's hands. "Maura said she didn't want to do this…"

"And since when has that stopped you before? Since when has one 'no' meant anything to you?" Angela asked. Jane looked away and Angela gave a gentle chuckle. "Janie…."

"What?" she sniffled.

"I know how much Maura means to you. And when you told me about Paris, I said I was worried about something happening because I was worried you two would get hurt. I was worried you'd get scared. I love Maura like a daughter, and I know how happy she makes you. I don't want to see you miss out on something, Jane. Something I've always wanted for you…"

Angela was in full blown tears now, choking out her last few words. Jane, who was usually the first to cut off her mother or try to squash an overly emotional exchange, stayed quiet.

"I know you don't want to be in Quantico. I know that your heart is here, in this place…and I'm sorry it took me so long to understand that," Angela sniffled. "But more than that, I know that your heart is with Maura. Promise me you won't give up on what you really want. Not when you're on the edge of something. That woman loves you Janie, more than anyone else in the world – except of course…"

"Except of course for you," Jane chuckled, wiping away her tears with the back of her hand. Angela grinned back and gave an assuring nod.

"I hope you try," Angela whispered.

"I will, Ma."

**..30 years later..**

AJ Rizzoli grimaced when she pulled in front of the North Shore house. She lingered by her car, allowing the snow and ice to fall onto her puffy jacket and tangle with her brown hair. The home, the place she'd spent her entire childhood, hit her with the pain of nostalgia. It came so hard that she felt her knees go weak.

Even in the blizzard she could smell the ocean. The Atlantic churned restlessly one the other side of the house, crashing against sharp rocks and slithering up the cold sand. AJ and her brothers had spent long summer days playing on their own private beach. She could see her mothers watching them from the deck, reading or bringing out lunch. They would always be laughing, touching, kissing when they didn't think the kids were looking. When it was time to come in or one of them strayed too far, Jane would give a loud, distinguishable whistle, followed by her scrappy, loud yell. AJ could hear it now.

She gave a long sigh as she started up the walkway. It'd been cleared of snow and AJ prayed her mother hadn't done it herself. The house was not just situated on Boston's harbor but massive and demanded much upkeep. It looked like something out of a fairytale in the snow. It had a white front with matching pillars, navy shutters and a matching door, with red brick surrounding the base and walk. It was a house the Kennedy family would have lived in. Her mothers had lived in Beacon Hill at one time, but AJ and her siblings only knew the North Shore.

This was home.

Before she could reach the porch, AJ heard a few stray barks. Then suddenly there was movement at the door. She stopped in her tracks on the brick steps. The wind picked up with a powerful gust, sending snow slapping across her face. The dog appeared first. A golden labradoodle that quickly stuck his tongue out in a sign of eagerness upon seeing her. And then out of the shadows of the house, she heard her voice.

"Alexandra?"

Dr. Maura Isles-Rizzoli was 65 years old but appeared just as youthful and beautiful as AJ remembered. Even in the middle of a blizzard her mother stood in the foyer with composure and style. She wore a cashmere sweater and pressed slacks. Her golden hair was faded but rolled down her shoulders with its familiar glow. Crows feet and lines pulled at her eyes and cheeks and she kept a pair of glasses on a gold chain around her neck.

"Hey mom," AJ greeted finally.

The two lingered longer than necessary. AJ was too nervous to come forward. Maura meanwhile examined her daughter with heavy hazel eyes, clearly working through several different emotions. Relief and joy that her oldest child was home but lingering pain and resentment at her long absence.

"Come in," Maura beckoned. "I just put on tea."

AJ gave a slow shrug and carefully started up the steps. The doctor waited until the woman was in reach and despite their awkwardness, wrapped her in a hug. Maura was shorter than AJ, who took after Jane's height.

"I'm glad you're home," she said.

"Me too," AJ sighed. She allowed herself to relax in her mother's hold, comforted by the fact that perhaps it wouldn't be as bad as she anticipated.

Maura led them through the foyer with Rosalind – the dog – following close behind. It'd been four years, but the house was much the same. The hardwood floors and artwork. The beautiful furniture and colors that could only be Maura Isles. And photographs of the entire family adorned the walls. AJ lingered as she passed the massive fireplace, doing her best to avoid looking at the centerpiece on the mantle.

"When did you get in?" Maura asked from the kitchen.

"A few hours ago," AJ said, sitting down on a bar stool near at the kitchen island. She watched as Maura grabbed two mugs and removed the hot water from the stove.

Being in the house for just a few minutes brought her warmth. The fire was cackling and her mother was baking something. AJ flashed back again to memories of childhood. She could see Maura cooking at the stove, her brothers wrestling in the living room and Jane coming through the door, tossing her keys onto the island and swiftly grabbing Maura by the waist, placing a kiss on her lips. She'd yell at the boys and sit at the island next to AJ and help her with homework. The young girl would eagerly ask her if she caught the bad guys, to which Jane would always answer yes.

"I hope the drive from New York wasn't too bad," Maura said gently.

"It was fine," AJ replied.

The tension was unfortunate. It hadn't always been like this. AJ was Maura's only daughter and while she was a spitting image of Jane, she wielded the doctor's tender spirit. But now their connection was frayed. Maura finished making their tea and suddenly they were left staring into their mugs, attempting to avoid what made them so uneasy.

"So is it official?" Maura asked finally.

"What?"

"Your position at BPD," she replied. "I imagine with your record they'd be more than happy to bring you on board."

AJ stayed rooted in confusion and Maura raised an eyebrow.

"Jamie told me," the doctor winked.

AJ had to do everything to keep from rolling her eyes. She regretted ever telling James anything. He was so close to Maura that he couldn't keep anything secret. But for now she would stay cordial.

"I'll start as a detective in a few days," AJ replied.

"And I imagine you saw your uncle?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "He asked about you."

The two women fell into silence again. AJ stared into her mug, allowing the heat to radiate into her palms. She thought of Jane's hands. The scars she always asked about as a girl. The scars that her mothers refused to tell her about. She had to look it up on the internet when she grew older. It sent her down a rabbit hole of cases. AJ had long been inspired to be a cop before that, but she wasn't afraid to admit that the obsession took off from there. The same obsession that drove her through adulthood.

"I wish you felt like you could've told me about all this," Maura finally said. Her voice and eyes conveyed such hurt that it brought pain to AJ's chest She hated making her mother upset.

"I know how you feel about," AJ muttered. "I didn't want to disappoint you."

"You could never disappoint me, Alexandra," Maura replied softly. She was clearly irked by her daughter's comment.

"Well, you could have fooled me," she said. AJ hadn't meant to snap so quickly but the argument had been building for nearly a decade. And despite the comforts of home, nothing could keep the tension at bay.

"That's not fair…"

"You never want to talk about my work, or my cases," AJ cut her off.

"You know why…"

"You hardly said a word when I passed my detective's exam," AJ vented. "And don't get me started on my graduation…"

"You did the one thing we asked you not to do!" Maura finally broke in with emotion. "We begged you, we both pleaded from the time you were a little girl, to not join the force."

"And so you disown me because I disobeyed you?"

"I didn't disown you," Maura shook her head. She swallowed past a thick lump in her throat, folding her arms across her chest. "I love you so fiercely and so much, you could never possibly understand. I gave birth to you despite the worst odds. And your mother and I swore we'd do everything to protect you and your brothers…"

"And you did."

"Not enough," Maura whispered. Her eyes filled with tears but none fell. Instead her gaze fell past AJ's shoulder, settling onto the top of the fire place. AJ knew where her mother was looking and refused to move. "The job nearly destroyed this family. And I know you were too young to understand…"

"I was sixteen," AJ replied. "I knew enough. I always knew."

"Your mother and I never wanted you to know the pain that we went through. We wanted to shield you from that. It was the one thing Jane asked you and your brothers not to do. To not become a cop."

"Well she's not here anymore," AJ whispered.

Maura's eyes lingered on the intricate gold urn that sat on the mantle.

"I'm sorry my being a detective hurts you but that's not why I did it. It's in my blood as much as it was in hers and yours. And I'm good at it, mom. I'm good at it like she was," AJ replied. "I wish you could see that as something positive, instead of some curse I put upon myself."

The doctor was still struck silent, unable to respond. She wrestled with too much agony to speak. Anymore on the subject would bring her to tears, so instead she cleared her throat.

"James is coming over for dinner," Maura said. "Will you stay?"

AJ Rizzoli gave a slow nod. "Of course."

"I know we may not see eye to eye on things, Alexandra. But I hope you being in Boston can allow us to make up for lost time," she told her. "I made up your bedroom if you choose to stay here...I'm glad you're back home."

Maura gave her daughters arm a gentle squeeze and kissed her on the cheek before leaving the kitchen. She took slow steps down the long hall, passing a long line of gold framed black and white photos. Her wedding day with Jane. The birth of Alexandra. Their first family photo as a foursome with James in her arms and Alexandra on Jane's hip. A photo of the birth of their youngest son, Owen, just days old and surrounded by his curious siblings. And a final photo of the five of them, just months before Jane was gone. Maura's arms were wrapped around her wife, her smile wide as the rest of the Rizzoli clan clamored in for a photo on the beach. Right in their backyard. A time when things felt like home. As she reached the master bedroom, Maura twisted her wedding ring – the one she never took off.

And while she longed for the fullness that Jane once brought their lives, Maura was grateful to have another piece of her love back home.

* * *

_Thank you for all the reviews! And yes, I'm sorry, but Jane is gone 30 years into the future. I know that may lose some readers but I can assure you there is still plenty of Rizzles to go around in this story with the moving timeline. 30 years worth! Thanks for reading :)_


	5. Chapter 5

She arrived back at the precinct at noon. The sun was high in the sky, threatening another blistering hot day. Maura arrived feeling somewhat refreshed. The shower and a healthy lunch helped her to physically feel like her old self. But mentally – and certainly emotionally – she was still unraveled. Back at Beacon Hill she found herself longing to hide away from the budding troubles. And at the same time, she couldn't get through her routine fast enough to find her way back to Jane's side. Even the tense quiet and unspoken hurt was better than not seeing her at all.

The former detective didn't hear Maura arrive. She was hunched over a desk, intently studying the transcripts and evidence of the Denton case. Jane was wearing a navy polo with the FBI insignia stitched above her right breast. Maura momentarily admired the lines of concentration stretched across her face.

"Hey," Maura said gently.

Jane looked up immediately, all previous seriousness dropping from her countenance. The doctor's appearance turned her tender.

"Hey," she greeted.

Maura took a few steps closer, relieved that no one else was in the bullpen. Her heart raced but she kept going, not stopping until she was at the edge of the desk. She leaned her hip against the wood, allowing Jane to take in the full length of her tight pencil skirt and sleeveless green blouse.

"How are things going?" the doctor asked.

"Okay. Just trying to see where I may have mis-stepped the last time," Jane answered. Her gaze lingered on Maura's legs and she forced herself to look away before it became too obvious. "They're getting him ready to talk to us at the prison."

Maura nodded and the two fell into silence. It was as though they'd already run out of things to say even though they were both bottling up lost words. Finally, the doctor cleared her throat.

"I didn't say it before and I should have," Maura started. "But I'm glad you're back. I-I uh…I missed you very much."

"I missed you too," she said. They stared at each other for a beat and Jane pulled in a slow breath. "I should've called you."

Maura quickly shook her head. "No, I ended things and I should have called you," she said. "And I shouldn't have let you leave that next morning."

"I shouldn't have left to begin with."

"We both made mistakes," Maura whispered.

"Did I ruin things between us?" Jane asked. Her brown eyes filled with such sadness and purity that it reminded Maura of a lost child. Her heart broke for Jane. And the pounding of her own chest continued to grow stronger.

"Of course not," Maura told her.

On instinct her hand reached out to Jane. She thought of pulling it away as she realized what she was doing but instead she carefully traced a few fingers down the woman's sharp jaw. Jane let the touch linger, doing her best to not completely lose herself. She gently pulled Maura's hand away from her cheek and held it with both of her own. She rubbed circles across the soft, tender skin and was quickly reminded of the warmth and sensuality the hands once brought her. Without thinking, Jane placed a gentle kiss on Maura's knuckles.

"I've hated every minute away from you," Jane confessed.

She released Maura's hand from her grasp.

"No," the medical examiner said, catching Jane by surprise. She left her seat on the desk and stepped forward, placing herself in front of the former detective. Maura ran another hand across Jane, this time caressing the back of her head. "Don't let go."

In an instant Jane stood, simultaneously wrapping her long arms around Maura's waist and pulling the doctor against her. Maura was surprised but didn't miss a beat, quickly hugging her arms around Jane's shoulders. Tears filled her green eyes as she held the woman again. The smells and sensations overwhelmed her. She felt like sobbing and hiding in Jane for eternity. When they pulled back from the embrace, Jane's arms lingered around Maura's waist and her eyes were shiny. The doctor put her hands on each of Jane's cheeks, ignoring the fact that a tear rolled down her own face.

"Please forgive me," Maura swallowed past a lump in her throat to get out the words.

Jane gave a tender tilt of her head. "I never blamed you," she whispered.

It was nearly impossible to say who kissed who but in an instant, their lips were against each other's. Maura pressed into Jane with passionate tenacity, her hands tangling with the woman's dark hair. Jane pulled the doctor tighter, slipping her tongue into her mouth, nearly seeing colors at the sweet taste. They didn't break for air until a light gasp echoed behind them.

"Oh wow," Frankie stammered.

He was about to back out of the room, but the two women jumped apart, both wide eyed and shocked at his appearance.

"Jesus, Frankie," Jane hissed in anger.

"Oh God," he stammered. "I'm sorry, I-I didn't know, realize, that was, I'm sorry…"

Maura blushed and looked to the floor but she wasn't embarrassed – just saddened to have their kiss cut short. She already longed to throw herself back into Jane's arms but she was now fierce and defensive thanks to the interruption.

"Grant Swindell is ready at the prison. We should get down there," Frankie continued. He gave Maura a sympathetic glance.

Jane quickly grabbed the file folder from her desk, still glaring at her brother while she did so.

"I'll meet you in the car," she snapped at him.

Frankie gave a nod. "Yeah. Sorry again," he said.

As soon as he was gone, Jane allowed herself to refocus on Maura. She was still rattled with anger and pent up passion. The doctor however appeared forlorn.

"I uh," Jane stopped. "I guess, I have to go."

"Yeah," Maura nodded. "You should. And I have some work to get done downstairs."

Before the doctor could leave the room, Jane gently grabbed her wrist. She slowly pulled Maura back so that they were facing each other.

"I think we should have dinner tonight," she said. "I think, we should talk."

"Talking is…important," Maura nodded. She was disheveled and uneasy but was quickly soothed by Jane's gentle smirk. She hadn't seen the smile in nearly a year. A smile only reserved for her. A smile that Jane gave with every quirk and idiosyncrasy that Maura couldn't hide.

"Yeah, it's important," Jane winked with a scrappy voice. She glanced over her shoulder, making sure no one else was about to walk in, and then with careful tenderness, she kissed Maura. The touch was sweet and short and brought light back to the doctor's face. Maura wrapped her arms around Jane, taking in her smell and warmth with a tight hug. When they pulled away Maura managed a small smile.

"Be careful," she said.

"It's just an interrogation," Jane told her. She squeezed Maura's hand. "I'll call you when we're done."

"You better."

Frankie had the car running, air conditioning blowing at full blast, by the time Jane flung open the passenger door and slammed it shut. She didn't say a word as she snapped on her seatbelt and her brother knew to simply step on the gas. Jane pulled on sunglasses as they peeled out of the garage, embarking on a short thirty-minute drive to Suffolk Correctional Facility.

Jane stared out the window, suppressing every desire in her to text Maura or turn around and run back to the medial examiner. Kissing her again was everything Jane wanted. But at the same time, it filled her with new fear – a fear she hadn't felt before. Fear that Maura would again walk away.

"So, you two back together?" Frankie asked.

Jane sighed, resting her chin on her hand. She was too tired and wrapped in her own emotional turmoil to get angry at her brother. She kept her eyes out the window, watching the cityscape turn to fields and suburbs.

"I don't know," Jane said. "I don't know if it's the best thing right now."

Frankie's face flickered with surprise. He gripped the steering wheel a little tighter as he glanced back over at his sister.

"But you love Maura," he replied.

"Yeah, so?" Jane asked. She looked over at him with a grim quirk of her mouth. "It didn't really matter last time around."

"Maybe this is different," Frankie said. "You both deserve to be happy; to be with each other."

"Thanks, Frankie," Jane whispered. "But I think maybe, I should focus on Grant and Olivia and this godforsaken case."

Grant Swindell had lost significant weight since the last time Jane had last seen him. His cheeks were gaunt and his fierce blue eyes sunken into the sockets. He'd lost most of his hair and wrinkles outlined his long cheeks. He looked slight in his orange jumpsuit as the Rizzoli siblings met him at a metal table in the prison cafeteria. Grant's wrists were handcuffed to the table and an armed guard lingered nearby.

"Good afternoon, Grant," Jane greeted him.

It'd been three years since she last saw him. It'd been in a court room, during his sentencing. Jane had testified against him as had Maura. They sat together as the judge read out his verdict. Grant sobbed hysterically as he was taken away in handcuffs. Jane could never respect him to begin with, but the pathetic way he carried himself made her despise him. He was a coward who preyed on children – the worst kind of criminal.

"What do you want?" Grant asked. He was quiet and clearly skeptical of their presence. He looked back and forth between Jane and Frankie as though waiting for one of them to physically accost him.

"Just wanted to see how prison was treating you," Frankie said.

Grant twitched nervously in his seat. The metal cuffs scraped against the table.

"Did you figure it out?" Grant asked.

Jane's brow furrowed. "Figure what out?"

"That I'm innocent," Grant replied. His sapphire eyes widened with new confidence. "Is that why you're here?"

Jane and Frankie exchanged glances. Just because they'd reopened Olivia Denton's case didn't assure Grant's innocence. But his foresight and clear trust in his own theory caught the Rizzolis off-guard.

"There have been some developments," Frankie conceded. They'd already agreed to not tell Grant that Olivia was potentially alive. It would just stir up a nightmare with the prisoner's lawyers and the media, which was what they didn't need if the girl was still out there.

"You've shared a lot of theories before," Jane added. "We wanted to see if your story is still the same."

"Something happened," Grant said hopefully. A small smile lifted his lips. "You're re-opening the case?"

"We haven't done anything yet, Grant," she lied. "But who knows? Maybe that could change if you help us. Right Frankie?"

Frankie silently nodded his head, not breaking eye contact with Grant. The forty-one year old pedophile inched closer in his seat, as far as the chains would allow. He was still smiling, in fact now he was smug, dropping his skittish façade from earlier.

"You already know my story," Grant told them. "Just check the court transcripts. This is all so much bigger than what you think. The real people who took Olivia; they're still out there."

"And yet you won't give us any names," Jane rolled her eyes. "Hell of a theory you have there…"

"I like living – even if it is behind these prison walls," he snapped. "You don't understand how much power these people have."

"All you're giving us is more nonsense, Grant," Frankie grunted. He glanced to Jane, playing coy. "This is pointless. I think we should go…"

"Wait!" the prisoner shouted. "Wait – just tell me what you want to know. Something I can actually give you…I can still be of help."

"I doubt that," Jane muttered. She folded her arms on the metal table and cleared her throat. "Tell me about Maura Isles."

At first Grant seemed surprised by the question but after a moment of thinking it over, his face tightened with another smirk.

"Who?" he asked.

"You're going to act like you don't know?" Jane said unamused. She nodded to Frankie. "Let's go."

"Oh! You mean Dr. Isles, the medical examiner?" Grant cut in. He gave a nervous laugh. "Yeah, I remember her. She came here to interview me with you a few times. I'll be honest, I thought it was strange. Then I put two and two together."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, that she was with you. I mean, you made it obvious. The way she looked at you…the way you were ready to pounce on me if I breathed wrong around her. It's getting me hot and bothered right now thinking about it…." Grant smiled.

Frankie nearly leapt across the table, his brown eyes wild with fury.

"You watch your fucking mouth, dirtbag," the detective snapped.

"Don't worry, I keep it all up here for private use," Grant said, tapping the side of his head. He gave Jane a wink and raised his eyebrows.

Jane stayed unbelievably clam. Grant's insights disturbed her but she wasn't about to give anything away. Not when it meant Maura or potentially Olivia's life.

"Who else did you tell?" she asked.

"Tell about the butch detective screwing the medical examiner?"

"Jane…" Frankie muttered. He wanted to kill Grant and was confused by his sister's level head. Jane refused to look at him.

"Answer my question."

"I can't remember who I told. Not a lot to write home about here," Grant shrugged. "Why do you ask? HR issue?"

Jane stared at her hands. They were clasped together tightly, her knuckles going white at the tension. It was all she could do to keep from jumping across the table and strangling Grant right then and there. Her face was hot from rage and she could feel Frankie staring at her.

"Someone threatened her," she told Grant.

"To provoke you," he said.

Jane straightened up, suddenly fascinated by his statement.

"What do you know about it?"

"I know nothing," Grant said. "I'm stuck here in prison. What the hell am I going to do?"

"You told someone to use Maura against me."

Grant belted a deep and unexpected laugh. It echoed loudly across the empty cafeteria and caused Jane's chest to jump with surprise.

"What's so funny asshole?" Frankie asked. When Grant kept chuckling, the younger Rizzoli yanked on the chains of his handcuffs, pulling him closer to the table. Grant stopped laughing and hissed in pain. "I'll give you something to laugh about…"

"You're such idiots," Grant growled. Spit flew from his mouth with emphasis. "You still think I'm behind all this? Even when someone else is out there, poking holes in your case? I know that's why you're here."

"And what else do you know?" Jane asked. "All evidence still points to you."

"The evidence? If that wasn't the most obvious plant job…"

"You've seen too many fucking movies," Frankie snapped.

"Maybe I have. Or maybe you two are in denial," Grant said.

"This is going in circles," Jane growled.

"Lets just say, everyone had their part, detective," Grant told her. He glanced at her shirt. "Or is it Agent Rizzoli now?"

"Everyone had a part? How many people are we talking, Grant?" Jane asked.

"I couldn't tell you."

"Of course not," Frankie hissed.

"And what was your part?" Jane asked. "Kidnap Olivia and kill her? Sounds like a one-man mission."

"I was the fall man," Grant said.

"Bullshit."

"What then? You think I'm the one threatening your girl?" Grant snapped. "You know I'm not."

"Then who is?"

"It could be anyone. The list is long – grunts like me, all the way to businessmen, probably politicians…"

"All for one little girl?" Frankie asked.

"It's not about one little girl," Grant said. "There are probably dozens just like her still out there."

"You saying Olivia is alive?" Jane asked.

Grant raised an eyebrow.

"Isn't she?" he asked.

Jane watched him, her mouth in a straight, rigid line. But even though she refused to say a word, it was clear that Grant already knew the answer. His gaze was just as haunting as Hoyt's all those years ago.

"Sounds like you and your friends will know before we do," she finally said.

She rose from her seat and Frankie did the same. Grant cleared his throat before they could turn to leave.

"Be careful detective. This involves some of your own," he said. "I asked during the trial and no one believed me...Find out what cop discovered those bloody clothes in my attic. Those weren't there before my arrest. I think they hold your key."

"Any other conspiracy theories you want to share?" Frankie scowled.

"Good luck," Grant glared back.

The brother and sister team waited until the doors to the cafeteria were safely shut behind them before they looked at each other. Frankie rubbed the back of his neck.

"You believe any of that?" he asked.

Jane was busy pulling out her cellphone.

"All I know that he wasn't the one who threatened Maura. And he's too stupid to have someone else do it," she said gruffly.

"So?"

"So, he's right about one thing. Someone else is out there," Jane muttered. She finished dialing and pressed the phone to her ear.

"Who are you calling?"

"Maura," she mumbled. Frankie pushed the button for the elevator at the end of the hall, watching in concern as Jane frowned. "She didn't answer."

"She's probably busy…"

"We need to get back to the station. Now."

* * *

Maura was determined to stay distracted. She sat rigidly behind her desk, keeping an empty gaze trained on her computer monitor. Case files were neatly stacked next to her. They usually would take little time to complete, but she dragged through the work. Her mind lingered on Jane. The kissing had stirred sweet emotion in her. But it also bred new anxiety. She feared what was to come next. Perhaps Jane wouldn't want her at all anymore. Maybe that's what their dinner would be all about.

"Don't let it get the best of you. That's what happened last time," the doctor mumbled to herself. She then quickly shook her head. "And now, you're talking to yourself…"

A sudden knock on the door pulled her out of her thoughts. Maura nearly jumped out of her seat as she looked up.

"Hello?" she called out.

Her brow furrowed as she realized the two officers assigned to her security detail were no longer there. Instead a new uniformed officer stood at her office door, barely visible through the blinds.

"Dr. Isles? It's officer Keller," a man's voice replied.

Maura didn't know why but his presence filled her with uncertainty. She attributed it to the leftover nerves she was feeling from her exchange with Jane.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

"Homicide sent me down to pick up results on the Wexler case."

The doctor blushed, realizing the results were right on the top of her stack. She should have sent them up hours ago. Maura grabbed the papers off her desk and made her way for the door. Her heels clicked loudly across the linoleum. Officer Richard Keller waited patiently in the hallway.

"Tell them I'm sorry for the delay…"

Before she could finish, the officer pushed her back into the office and quickly shut the door.

"What are you-"

In an instant he looped a rough arm around her waist. Maura gave a high-pitched yelp but he slapped his hand over her open mouth. The doctor squirmed and jerked in his hold. She managed to slam an elbow into his ribcage, forcing his grip loose.

"Help!" she screamed.

The medical examiner attempted to reach the door, but officer Keller forcefully shoved her off balance and sent her tumbling to the ground. Maura's heart was racing and adrenaline coursed through her veins but she couldn't will her body to move fast enough. Keller clamored on top of her, holding her wrists down to the floor.

"Help! Someone!" Maura yelled louder.

"No one is going to hear you," Keller hissed. "I made sure of that."

He moved one hand to her throat, holding her in place on the floor. His other hand reached for his back pocket, pulling out a white cloth. Maura knew exactly what it was as it moved toward her. She jerked and tears sprang to her eyes but it was suddenly over her mouth and nose. The room spun and her eyelids became heavy. She fell under the power of chloroform. And officer Richard Keller carried her out of the precinct without delay.


	6. Chapter 6

The shoe was high-heeled and blue. A shade only Maura Isles could pull off. Jane gripped onto it, twirling it back and forth in her nimble fingers, holding on as if it was a last life line to the woman she loved.

"One of the guys on her security detail just came to. He confirms it was officer Keller that took her," Korsak announced.

Jane snapped her head up as he entered the room. She sat at Frankie's desk, her eyes drifting back and forth between Maura's shoe that'd been left behind during her abduction and Frost's action figure next to her brother's computer.

"Any luck with the security footage?" Korsak asked.

He directed the question to Frankie and Nina who were suctioned to another computer.

"No. Keller managed to shut them all off before going down to the morgue."

It hadn't taken them long to realize Richard Keller had taken Maura when they arrived back at the station. The doctor's security detail was passed out, after the corrupt cop used a taser on them. Frankie and Jane quickly followed Grant Swindell's advice – and sure enough the officer who discovered Olivia's clothes at the scene four years ago, was none other than Officer Keller.

"We're still trying to figure out what car he's driving," Nina said. "It's a lot of street cameras but we'll find them."

"We have calls into his family, girlfriend. We'll have more information soon," Frankie added.

Korsak placed a gentle hand on Jane's shoulder. It was unlike her to stay so quiet.

"You okay?" he asked.

"If anything happens to her..."

"Nothing is going to happen to her, Janie," Frankie cut in before Korsak could.

"This is my fault," Jane whispered.

"You know better than that," Korsak said.

She squeezed onto Maura's shoe tighter. Images flashed through her head. Maura's green eyes, glistening in the morning light, staring at her as she woke up in Paris. The doctor's wide grin as Jane entered the morgue. The way her hands lingered on the former detective for longer than necessary. And her lips – her lips during every kiss, specifically the most recent embrace, haunted Jane's thoughts. Her heart thundered with anxiety and fear. The idea of losing Maura brought her to the brink of panic.

"We need you on this," Korsak whispered to her. "You need to stay strong Jane. We won't find her without you."

Still, she couldn't move. It'd never hit her like this before. Jane typically jumped into cases, even the most dangerous and precarious, with both feet. It wasn't the first time that Maura's life was in danger. But it was the first time that she represented more to Jane than just her best friend or distant crush. Now Maura was hers and she was Maura's. The idea that it'd been swiped away, and Jane may never get it back, brought her to a terrified standstill.

"Jane…" Korsak tried again.

She stared down at the blue shoe in her hands. It reminded her of Cinderella's slipper.

Suddenly it wasn't the images of the past that hit Jane. Instead, something she hadn't seen before. It was a future. A future with Maura. A smile on a wedding day. A squirming baby. A big house that was all theirs. Vacations, holidays, parenthood, retirement, growing old together. It was what Angela had wanted for her daughter all along. The very line that Jane hadn't dared to cross. The life that was just out of reach. And now that she could see it so clearly, Jane was determined to secure it.

"Come on, kid," her mentor whispered.

"He's going to need money," Jane said. Frankie and Nina looked over in surprise. The gangly cop rose to her feet, looking rumpled but resolute in her jeans and FBI polo shirt. "Let's look back over his bank records. We'll see if there's any large deposits – see if we can trace the money. That will give us our lead. Especially if Keller is part of some larger play like Swindell claims."

"Follow the money," Korsak nodded in agreement.

Jane clenched her fists with restored confidence.

"She's been gone less than an hour. We won't let him get far with her."

* * *

She jerked awake to the sound of a backfire. She screamed and flailed, unsettled by the blindfold around her eyes and the tape over her mouth. Maura could hardly sit up with her hands tied behind her back and unsteady metal beneath her. Her heart was racing and she continued in hysterics, bouncing and thrashing as she tried to move.

"Shut up! Shut up!" an angry male voice growled from a short distance.

He startled her and suddenly the hazy memories surfaced. She remembered being in her office. A uniformed officer shoved his way inside and drugged her. It seemed like a bizarre nightmare, but Maura was certain it had happened. She did her best to get her breathing back under control, though not being able to see made it difficult for her to settle down.

_You have to stay calm. You have to stay calm or you'll die._

The doctor repeated the phrase in her head with the logic she was known for. She listened above her hammering heartbeat in her ears. She could hear traffic whooshing by. Tires moaned on concrete below. The cold metal wall she leaned against, moved unexpectedly, slamming her shoulder a few times.

She was in a car.

A van. A worker's van with an open backseat. She pulled in a slow breath. Her abductor was taking her somewhere.

_Your chances of being found reduce greatly if you're taken outside the radius of where you were abducted. _

Without thought, Maura started to flail again. She tried to get up to her feet, though that was irrational, and fell as the van hit a dip in the road.

"Stay down or I swear to God I'll kill you!" the man screamed at her.

Maura groaned as she rolled on the metal floor of the van. She'd landed on her hip during the fall. It now throbbed as she tried to sit herself back up. She needed to release her hands. That was her only chance. Maura attempted to pull her wrists apart but it only brought her pain. She grunted again, recognizing that her hands were held together by zip ties.

The van swerved, throwing her to the other side of the backseat. Tears sprang to her eyes in pain as she rolled onto her back. The unbearable feeling of helplessness hit her. She couldn't imagine how she could possibly find her way out.

_Jane. Please, Jane find me. Bring me home._

Maura envisioned the woman's striking face, comforted by the idea of seeing her again. The chance to wake up to her one more time. While thoughts of Jane brought her hope, they also hit her with intense longing. More scared tears fell, dampening the cloth tied around her head.

"Oh fuck," the driver shouted.

A familiar sound blared above the traffic. Sirens. The sirens of a patrol car. Maura wondered how long she'd been unconscious. It seemed they'd found her in remarkably quick time. She braced for the van to accelerate. She wasn't out of danger yet. In fact, this may have put her at even greater risk.

"If you say a fucking word, I will kill you, do you understand?" the driver barked.

To her surprise the van was slowing down. She could hear gravel crunch under the tires. The siren sounded closer to them and suddenly the van came to a stop.

"I swear to God, I'll kill you. I don't care if that means I die too," the man hissed. "You stay still and quiet, or you won't see Jane again. I promise you that."

Even if she'd been determined to disobey him before, Jane's name on her captor's lips brought Maura to a standstill. The breath hitched in her throat. He'd managed to use her worst fear against her.

_I have to see her again. I have to tell her. _

The goal came to her with stunning clarity. She needed to tell Jane she loved her, and Maura would do anything to survive. She settled quietly against the side of the van, only able to listen in her blindfolded state.

"Good afternoon officer," Keller greeted.

He sat in the driver's seat, hands clenched around the wheel. He hadn't planned to stop, but he had less chances of making it out of a car chase than talking his way past a patrol officer. His years on the force gave him crucial insight. Obviously if just one cop was tasking himself with pulling Keller over, then he really had no idea who he was or what he was up to.

"Sir, do you know how fast you were going?" the officer asked.

"I'm not sure officer," Keller replied.

His gun was stored safely in a plastic holster beneath the steering wheel. He kept his gray eyes ahead, prepared to grab the weapon in one swift motion if his captive or the officer decided to do anything rash.

"You were going 70 in a 55," the officer replied.

Keller had to stop himself from rolling his eyes. In the backseat, Maura shifted uneasily, doing her best to not make a sound. Her bare feet were curled beneath her. It was unbearably humid out and sweat poured out of her in excess, rolling down her cheeks and neck, staining her green blouse. And yet even in the extreme heat, she shivered.

"Another driver called you in; said you were driving erratically," the officer continued. "Have you been drinking?"

Keller vigorously shook his head.

"No, no sir. I'll do the test right now if you'd like. I'm sober for seven years," he lied.

The young officer squinted into Keller's face, sun glistening on his warm cheeks. Cars sped by as he stood near the van's open window. They were forty miles outside the city, on a wide country highway, surrounded by nothing but farmland. The officer must have surely gotten the alert about the Medical Examiner's kidnapping, but he appeared unsuspicious of Keller thus far.

"Can I see your license and registration?"

Keller gave a relieved smile and nodded.

"Of course," he replied.

He'd prepared a fake identity and now felt in the clear as he reached for his glovebox. Before he could hand over the documents, a shriek filled the van.

The decision to scream had been impulsive. Impulsive and fearless like the woman she so admired. Maura knew she was risking her life the moment she belted out the yell but she believed it as her only opportunity to fight for Jane. It drove her every action.

"Help! It's Maura Isles! I've been abducted! Help me!" Maura pleaded.

Everything that followed must have occurred in twenty seconds.

The patrolman looked to the backseat in confusion, his intrepid eyes bulging at a dilapidated Maura Isles tied up. Keller wasted not a second. He pulled the gun out, expertly switched off the safety, and pressed it to the officer's forehead without a second thought. Not worried of the passing cars, Keller shot the man before he even had a chance to look back. Blood sprayed out the back of the officer's head, hitting Keller's face and the interior of the car. The patrolman instantly dropped to the gravel. Two cars flew by and the occupants swiveled their heads around in shock.

When Maura heard the gunshot, she steadied for impact. The doctor was certain the bullet was for her and shrank in fear. Jane's face flashed across her mind, along with all the two were about to miss. Maura was certain in her last breath, that she wanted to marry the former detective.

But the pain never came.

Just as quickly as she realized the bullet wasn't for her, the van was moving again. The tires' screeched as the vehicle pulled back out onto the main road and her body rocked against the door frame.

"Help me! Help!" Maura screamed again, though the van was reaching full speed and no one could possibly hear her.

"We're fucked! This is your fault!" Keller shouted maniacally. "I'm not going down like this! We're going to figure this out – I'm not going down like this! I'll kill you! I swear to God I will!"

The gun backfired and Maura shrieked. She heard a bullet hit the metal of the van and cowered at the terrifying idea of it ricocheting and hitting her. The fear rushed so quickly again to her head that she thought she might pass out. Her heart and body were in such a heightened state that she found herself dizzy and tired. She could only manage to lay down on the floor of the van, praying that Jane found her soon.

* * *

In a matter of twenty minutes, they'd tracked down their strongest lead yet. A lead that Jane felt embarrassed for not establishing before. Of course, in the heat of the circumstances, it was something she would have to process later.

For the last three years, Everett Corporation, one of the city's wealthiest contracting companies and responsible for most of Boston's skyline, had been making monthly payments of twenty-five thousand dollars to Richard Keller. The corporation also paid tuition for two students at the same private school Keller's children attended.

"I found a link to Grant Swindell," Nina announced.

She pulled up a file on her computer as Korsak, Frankie and Jane huddled around. It was a copy of Grant Swindell's commissary deposits.

"Two thousand dollars a month to Suffolk Correctional. All made by Terrence Parker, chief investment officer at Everett Corps."

"I already made a call to his office. Secretary says he's out of town and that those payments to Keller were for security consultations," Jane said.

"Why would a secretary know that information?" Frankie asked, looking over at her from the opposite side of Nina.

"Because she was fed a line in case it ever came up," Korsak said between them.

Jane nodded in agreement.

"I'll do what I can to track him down," Frankie said.

"Meanwhile, lets get a list of properties in a fifty-mile radius that Everett Corporation or Terrence Parker own. Anything that could be used as an escape or hide out. Vehicles, private planes…"

"Cop in Halifax just got shot!"

A spunky uniformed officer with her hair tied in a bun and a thick Boston accent breathed heavily as she made the announcement. She'd barreled through the door, cutting off Jane in her urgency.

"What?" Korsak and Jane barked at her.

"A cop…he pulled over a van off the highway. Guy shot him," she explained. "Dispatcher says they heard a woman screaming on the other end. They swear she said her name was Maura Isles."

Jane grabbed her phone and the service weapon off the desk in front of her.

"What kind of car?" she asked.

"Black construction van," the officer breathed. "County, local police, everyone is all over it. Staties will be there soon…"

"What's the license plate number?" Jane cut her off.

"3-6-4, Whiskey Echo Charlie," the young woman said obediently.

"Nina, look up any properties connected to Everett or…"

"Already on it," Nina nodded, eagerly typing into her computer.

"Hey, Jane, hold on a second," Korsak cut in.

"What?" she snapped, securing the gun onto her waistband.

"You're not going at this alone. You don't know what this guy is capable of and we're an hour behind. Let's give this to County so they can track Maura down."

"No."

"Jane, it's in Maura's best interest…"

"I'm not letting anyone fuck this up. I will handle this," Jane growled.

"You're being ridiculous," Frankie snapped.

"Maura only has so much time!" Korsak put in.

"Nina, give me the addresses!" Jane yelled.

The analyst wavered, her finger hovering above the print icon. The young female officer at the door watched the scene in apprehension.

"Jane, you're emotional and you need to let the right people do their jobs. You're too close to this," Korsak whispered gently, raising an eyebrow at the end. "We all love her and want her back."

"Yeah? Not like me," she replied in a gravely tone. "Nina, I need those now."

The analyst quietly obeyed as the detectives squared off with each other. The papers loudly ejected from the printer and Frankie glared at his fiancée as she went to gather them.

"Don't do this Jane," he growled. "You're not even a detective anymore…"

"Oh screw you, Frankie! Both of you!" Jane barked.

She snatched the papers out of Nina's hand before the analyst realized what had happened. Jane looked to the young officer on her way to the door.

"Come with me," she told her. "What's your name?"

"Emily Owens," the officer said as she scampered after Jane.

"Okay. Your have a patrol car?"

"Yes," Emily stammered.

She'd heard of Jane Rizzoli and was in fact inspired to join the force by all the stories she'd read about the woman. Now she followed her in awe to the elevator, in no position to disobey, let alone respond to her idol.

"Alright, well, you're driving Officer Owens," Jane murmured.

**...30 years later...**

"Mom? I said how's Owen…"

Maura snapped out of her reverie, realizing that she'd been staring at her daughter across from her at the dining room table. AJ gazed back in concern, her long fingers clenched tightly around her fork. The young woman's looks sometimes struck Maura like a dirty trick. She looked so much like Jane it was as if the detective was back where she belonged.

"Mom are you okay?" James asked.

He'd been speaking to his mother for several minutes but she'd been unresponsive. James and AJ exchanged nervous glances. They'd unfortunately seen Maura like this before. Her eyes would go blank as she remembered one of the many horrors she'd seen over the years. When Jane was around, she'd tell the kids to go play or explain why mom need to take a day of quiet. As children, it'd scared them despite Jane's motherly assurances. But upon becoming older, along with their parents intensive requests to not join the police force, it was clear that something awful had happened. Something Maura or Jane would never be able to get over.

"I'm sorry," Maura finally said.

She pulled in a slow breath, nervously fidgeting with her cloth napkin. She gave her children a weak smile, attempting to prove she was okay. The three of them were seated at the massive mahogany table in the dining room. The lights were dim and a few candles flickered. Maura rarely used the space since the kids moved out. She'd gone a little overboard in her excitement, cooking a roast and various side dishes. The group was already through one bottle of her finest merlot.

"I was just thinking of work," she explained to them.

AJ frowned and looked down at her lap. James, the more patient of the siblings, grabbed onto Maura's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

Maura loved all her children fiercely and equally, but she'd always shared a special connection with her oldest son. James' adoption had been unexpected. Alexandra was just nine months old when Jane found him, days old, during a case. The detective planned to give the baby to child services after his blood relatives gave up their rights. But Maura knew he was theirs. The moment she held the boy in her arms, before even being certain that they could take him in as their own, she knew James was their son.

The instant bonding, coupled with her own adoption, endeared them to each other. When the young, black boy of two white mothers became confused, it was Maura who explained that they were family. And when the boy proved a prodigy, making him even more different than he already was at a private nearly all-white school, it was Maura who guided him through the obstacles of being a child genius. So, it was certainly no surprise that James Angelo Rizzoli, followed in the footsteps of his mother by going to medical school and becoming a doctor.

"How's work going?" James asked, deciding to change the subject. He didn't want to linger on Maura's quiet episode so attempted to keep conversation light. Especially since things were already tense between his mother and older sister.

"It's going well," Maura nodded. "I enjoy my students, though I find them harder and harder to connect with. I don't know what they're talking about most of the time."

"Is Owen still on probation?" AJ cut in.

The question caused Maura to falter.

"He has a meeting with the review board in a few weeks," she answered sadly.

The topic of the youngest Rizzoli always brought a frown to Maura's face and that made AJ and James resentful. Since childhood, Owen, had been a wild card and challenge for his mothers. Between drugs in high school to DUI's and now a suspension from his teaching fellowship at Boston College, he'd struggled to find his way. It didn't help that Jane died when he was just eleven.

"Where's he staying?" AJ asked.

"With that same student that got him in trouble to begin with," James grunted.

"Jesus. Mom, if he's asking you for money…"

"Oh don't get me started, she's always giving him money…"

"Both of you; James, Alexandra, please don't," Maura snapped.

"Owen can't keep taking advantage of you," AJ insisted both irritated and protective of her aging mother. "You're the reason he got that job to begin with and he threw away the opportunity…"

"He got it on his own merit."

"He's ungrateful," James murmured.

"I don't know why you lie for him," AJ agreed.

"Like you two lie to me?" Maura asked. She hadn't meant to call out the kids and hated nothing more than fighting with them but she felt cornered. "I know what you're doing, taking a job in Boston, Alexandra."

AJ slowly looked to James. She wore a deep burgundy turtle neck that made her brown eyes look even darker in the dim light. He shook his head.

"James didn't say anything," Maura told her. "I just know you."

"I didn't want you to find out."

"What is the point of digging around the Denton case?" she asked coldly.

"For starters, it got mom killed," AJ said.

"Alexandra…"

Maura hated hearing the sentence fall from her daughter's mouth. She felt a tremble start in her hand. She hid it under the table in her lap, away from James' observant gaze.

"Talking about this will just upset her," James muttered to his sister.

"Don't act like I'm not here, Jamie. I've handled that case and much more, longer than the two of you have been alive," Maura growled. "Do not reopen it, Alexandra."

"There are still so many holes."

"It's closed and it's done…"

"And it still haunts you! You still drift off to this terrible place and you've refused to tell any of us about it," AJ said.

"Allie, lay off," James scolded her.

Maura did her best to keep her breathing under control. Suddenly her hip and shoulder ached. The same pain of the van that day. The gunfire echoed in her ears. And then there were _his_ hands. Keller's hands tracing down her cheeks. Maura did her best to blink out of the flashback.

"I want to get whoever did this," AJ told her mother. "I want get anyone who had anything to do with mom's death. We all need it. We need closure. Maybe it would even help you, mom. Don't you want this finished?"

"It is finished for me," Maura said.

"Something horrible happened to you and ma. Why won't you talk to us about it? After all this time?"

"Because you don't need to know those things. And because it's over."

"It's not over for you," AJ whispered. "It still brings you all that pain. And there's more out there. I want to finish it; like mom would've wanted."

James looked nervously between his mother and sister. AJ waited confidently in her seat, staring past the fire at Maura. Her cheeks were rounder with age and children but she seemed more frail than ever before. Even behind the flawless make-up, comforting wrinkles, and curled hair tinted with gray, it was clear she suffered from deep, distant pain.

"I'll tell you," Maura said. She looked into AJ's eyes, again struck by the feeling that she was talking to Jane all over again. "Not tonight, I need time. But I'll tell you what happened. And maybe then you'll understand why I don't want you to do this."


	7. Chapter 7

Maura woke with a startle when the van stopped again. She didn't know how she managed to pass out but between the rough ride and exhausting herself with fear and screaming, she didn't think it was a far-off possibility. It was darker out. She couldn't see anything through her blindfold, though she heard Keller get out of the truck.

"Help! Someone help!" she yelled.

Her voice was scratchy and her throat hurt but she didn't stop shouting. Her body was covered in bruises and scratches from her ride in the van, but she managed to sit back up

"Help me! I've been abducted! Help!"

The van door slid open and before she could think of running, a hard fist smashed across her face. The force knocked her down onto her back. She whimpered against the splitting ache in her cheek.

"You stay quiet," Keller barked.

"Please, please don't hurt me," Maura cowered.

She couldn't help it. Instinct took over and while she was unable to see, she frantically scooted away from him. Keller snatched one of her bare ankles and dragged her back to him.

"No! No! Help me!" she cried.

"Stop it!" Keller growled, gripping her by both arms. His fingers dug into her soft skin. He squeezed her face into one of his hands, bringing her more pain as she attempted to slip out of his grip. "Stop! Shut up!"

He slapped her again and Maura tasted blood in her mouth. It rolled down her lip.

"Please, please, don't," she begged. "Please let me see. Please let me see. Take off my blindfold."

Keller's brow furrowed as he continued to wrestle her down, desperate to make her quiet.

"Please, I'm panicking, because I can't see," Maura breathed anxiously. She was telling the truth. The darkness made the ordeal even worse. She was struck with a panic attack so fierce that she couldn't be silent, even if it meant her life. "Help! Please!"

"Shhhh," Keller hissed.

He suddenly ripped the blindfold off her face. Maura's eyes were shocked to take in the setting sun through the trees. They were in the middle of the forest. As she blinked and adjusted her sight, Keller pressed his gun to her forehead.

"I took your blindfold off so that you would be quiet," Keller said. "Now are you going to be quiet?"

Maura gave a quick nod. She looked down at her skirt. It had ripped on one side of her leg. She was dirty and sweaty. Blood came from cuts that she couldn't find.

"Are you going to kill me?" she asked Keller.

The bald, middle-aged cop glared. His gray eyes tore angry holes into her. Unfortunately, they'd be eyes she could never forget.

"Not yet," Keller told her.

He quickly threw her over his shoulder. Maura pulled in a gasp, not daring to scream. She simply watched the dirt and vines of the forest move dizzily beneath her and listened to Keller's boots plow through the shrubbery.

* * *

Jane stared out the open passenger window across the yellow fields and allowed her scarred hand to hang amongst the wind. An orange, pink, and purple sunset reflected in her aviator sunglasses. The few loose pieces of brown hair that had slipped loose of her ponytail, were gently moved by the breeze. It was a desperate meditation for calm, because inside, Jane Rizzoli was screaming.

As Officer Emily Owens sped the car around bends and through the sparse traffic, Jane thought of all the terrible things that could be happening to Maura. She tensed and shuddered at each possibility, only comforted by her rage and determination to kill Keller with her own hands.

"We're about eight miles out from Halifax," Emily spoke up. "The scene should be just outside of town…"

"We're not going to the scene," Jane said coldly. She kept her gaze fixed on the horizon.

"Why not?" Emily snapped, allowing her thick Southie accent to spill out. She blushed in embarrassment. "I'm sorry, detective…."

"We're not going to the scene because Maura's not there and we've already lost time," she smirked. The energetic redhead in her navy uniform reminded Jane of herself several years before.

"So we're going to the nearest Everett Corp properties?" Emily asked. "Did Nina find somewhere belonging to Terrence Parker?"

"We're not going to the closest place. That's the first place all the uniforms will go anyway," Jane explained. "Keller would need to put distance between him and the police but away from the main road. Somewhere he could buy time without witnesses."

"Where's that?"

"Everett Corps owns twelve acres a county over. It would have been a safe detour for Keller," Jane said. "I say we start there."

"Should we call for backup? Tell anyone we're in route?" Officer Owens asked. She squeezed the steering wheel a little tighter in her anxiety. Jane shook her head.

"No. Besides, I'm sure Frankie and Korsak won't be far behind us," she said confidently.

Jane knew she was being unbearably stubborn. She knew she was taking a gamble and even putting her life at risk. Perhaps putting Maura in greater danger. But she also knew they were running out of time. She knew that if she didn't find Maura, she wouldn't be able to live with herself. Blind love drove her every action. She was desperate and for that she was also dangerous.

"I know it's not my business," Emily broke the quiet. She was sheepish but still harbored the old habits and bad manners of her old Boston neighborhood. "But you and the doctor…you guys are like…you know…"

The question caught Jane off guard. She looked over at the uniformed cop in slight astonishment, realizing that she'd never been asked the question so directly before. Her heart skipped a beat like an elated teenager's.

"Sorry, just station gossip -"

"Yeah, we're together," Jane cut in.

It felt new and right to say it to the stranger. In fact, it was the first time she'd said it to anyone. It filled her with a new pride. Maura was hers. They hadn't exactly sorted things out but that much was clear.

"You make a nice couple. Are you going to get married?" Emily asked in her burly Boston accent. It didn't fit her slight body and fair skin.

Jane gave a snort, surprised again at her boldness.

"I'm sorry," the officer apologized, clenching onto the steering wheel tighter. "My sisters say I talk too much and I have wedding brain."

"You're getting married?"

"Yeah," Emily smiled. "My fiancée, Andrew, and I met in kindergarten, can you believe that? We still live in the old neighborhood, but he says he's going to move us to the country like this and build us a house. He's a contractor. But I think I want to stay in Dorchester. It's memories, you know?"

"I know," Jane nodded, grateful for the distraction. "Congratulations."

"Thanks…holy shit," Emily cursed unexpectedly, her brown eyes widening at the scene ahead.

Jane quickly whipped her head around, taking in the commotion on the side of the road. A body bag was still present and surrounded by several law enforcement officials. Half a dozen cop cars were lined up along the road, along with the fallen officer's. Jane's gut tightened. She couldn't keep her thoughts from drifting to Maura. To the fear that the woman could be Keller's next victim.

"You want to stop?" Officer Owens asked.

"No. Keep going."

* * *

Keller tied Maura to a chair as soon as they were inside the cabin. It was sparsely furnished and clearly unused. Dust and mold collected on the ceiling and wood floors. A chill filled the space as the sun went down. There was no electricity, so Keller relied on a flashlight and a few mosquito repellent candles. The dim glow made Maura even more terrified than she already was. When she searched for an escape or possible weapon, all she found were shadows.

"We're not going to last long out here," she muttered.

Her captor was anxiously pacing the floor, his frantic footsteps betraying his true nerves.

"No one asked you," Keller grunted.

"Why did you take me?" Maura asked. "Just to get to Jane? For what? And what does it have to do with Olivia Denton?"

"It's none of your damn business," he barked.

The doctor wasn't sure why she was suddenly comfortable asking questions, but it seemed to be the only way to keep herself calm. Learning the reason behind her abduction certainly helped her frayed mind. She could also sense she was getting to Keller, who suddenly appeared to have no direction.

"Olivia is alive, isn't she?" Maura asked. "How else would you get that blood? And you knew where Jane was, where I am…"

"If you don't stop talking, I swear I'll kill you," Keller snapped. He stopped pacing and pulled the gun from his waistband.

"No, you won't. You need me now," the doctor realized. She shifted uneasily in the splintered chair, again trying to separate her tied wrists. "Where's Olivia?"

Keller suddenly came at her from the shadows. Maura flinched at his movement before he swung the gun across her face, making her see white. The blow brought tears to her eyes.

"For a genius, you're really stupid," Keller hissed.

He put the gun back in his waistband and pulled out his cell phone.

"Here's what we're going to do, Dr. Isles," he started agitatedly, "We're going to make a little film."

Maura looked down to the floor, avoiding the camera. Tears rolled down her cheeks as the helpless feelings came rushing back. As the darkness fell around them in the cabin, she was struck by the feeling that Jane would never find her. She would die before morning.

"I'll use you as double bait. Used to get Rizzoli….and bait for my bosses," Keller stammered. Sweat beaded his brow and made his bald head look shiny even in the shadows. "Look at me."

Maura kept her head down and Keller squeezed her chin back into his hand. He jerked up her face, forcing her green eyes to come face to face with him. The light on the front of the phone assaulted her gaze.

"Tell them what's happened to you Dr. Isles," Keller instructed, inching the camera a little closer to her.

The doctor bit down on her lower lip, keeping her mouth sealed shut. Keller became more aggressive.

"Speak!" he barked.

Maura shook her head, tears springing to her eyes. Her body trembled as he forcefully grabbed her shoulder, shaking her violently.

"You better start cooperating," Keller threatened. He leaned in close, trailing a finger down her chest. "Or we could be making a much different video…"

He took the same finger and traced it across Maura's lips. His face flickered with perverse longing coupled with hatred. Maura knew something much worse than the kidnapping or physical harm was about the happen.

"Do you think your butch Detective will still want you after I have my way with you?" Keller asked.

He kept the camera rolling as he aggressively leaned in, forcing his lips to hers. Maura instantly jerked away, spitting in his face, not just to offend him but get the ungodly taste of her mouth. The unwanted kiss left her terrified and vulnerable to what else he might do. Keller turned more enraged than before. He threw the phone across the room, causing Maura to yelp. He slapped a hand across the doctor's already bloody face, putting another scratch along her cheek.

Keller was about to grab her by the arms when the sound of tires cut through the quiet woods.

Both Maura and Keller went still as the noise became louder. It was most definitely a car. The engine hummed and headlights flashed, interrupting the shadows on the wall. Keller grabbed his gun but Maura could see his hand was trembling.

Her heart seized with hope.

_It was Jane. It had to be Jane._

Who else would manage to find her so quickly?

The car stopped and Keller moved to peak out the window, hiding behind the inner wall and carefully squinting across the dark forestry. Sure enough, a BPD patrol car was about sixty yards away, just before the start of the gravel driveway.

"Fuck," Keller hissed.

Outside, Officer Emily Owens looked to Jane Rizzoli in fear. At the start of her mission, she was enthusiastic and even elated to join the storied detective. But as they pulled up to the driveway and spotted the black work van, she was struck by apprehension.

"That's it. 3-6-4, Whiskey Echo Charlie," Jane read.

Light was barely visible in the windows of the cabin but she was certain they'd reach the spot. It was as if she could feel Maura closer to her.

"Call it in," Jane whispered.

Emily Owens' hands were shaking as she grabbed onto her radio.

"11-99, 11-99, requesting all nearest units – all nearest units – this is BPD Unit 65, we've located suspect vehicle, plates 3-6-4, Whiskey Echo Charlie," Owens could barely get out the words. Jane gave the young woman's shoulder an assuring squeeze. "Location is sixteen miles west off Highway 33…we're in forestland south of Halifax. Believe we've found Maura Isles."

"Units in route. Do not leave your vehicle Unit 65. Await back-up," the operator cackled back.

Another familiar voice broke through the radio.

"BPD Unit 32. This is Sergeant Vince Korsak, we are ten minutes from your location," Korsak informed. "Await back-up."

"Copy," Officer Owens stammered.

Despite the order, Jane was checking the clip of her gun. She zipped up her windbreaker and did her best to see across the dark woods. She was certain Maura was inside and she was also certain Keller had heard them approach. They had little time before the abductor made a move.

"Help!"

The scream echoed loudly from the cabin, causing Jane to bolt up. It was Maura. Her adrenaline surged so violently that she felt hot vomit at the back of her throat. She squeezed her gun.

"Help!" Maura yelled again.

Jane unlocked her door and pulled at the handle. Officer Owens pulled her back.

"They said to wait," Officer Owens said.

"I'm not letting him hurt her or get away with her," Jane growled. She knew the young officer was scared. "You wait for the back-up."

Officer Owens watched as Jane slithered out into the night, gun ready, eyes set on the cabin. Inside Keller was scrambling to unbind Maura's wrists, prepared to either run with her or use her as a human shield. He pressed the gun into her back.

"You'll do as I say," Keller warned. "Or you die."

"Keller, you in there?" Jane called from outside.

"Jane!" Maura screamed. Hearing the woman's voice and knowing that she'd indeed been found, filled Maura with hope. She lunged toward the windows and Keller pulled her back, putting the gun underneath her ear.

"Don't think about it Rizzoli!" Keller shouted. "I have a gun to her head! I'll kill her!"

Jane quickly put her hands in the air and came out from her hiding spot behind the black construction van. She came in full view of the cabin windows and made a long show of putting her gun back in the holster. She was about twenty yards from the front door.

"I'm unarmed and alone!" Jane called to him. "Just let Maura go!"

"You really think I'm going to trust you?" Keller barked. "Besides, the doctor is my only leverage now!"

"Let's have a talk Keller!" Jane said. She kept moving toward the front door at a steady pace. She wondered if Keller could even see her in the dark. "Let's talk about Olivia Denton!"

"No!"

"Let's talk about Everett Corporation!"

"If you take another step, I'll kill her!" he threatened.

This caused Jane to stop and Maura to tense in Keller's arms. He pressed the gun harder to her temple.

"Let me in, Keller," Jane said calmly. "Let's figure out a deal. Just me and you. Let's get you out of this before it gets worse."

"There's no way out," Keller muttered.

"Information is power," Jane continued. "And you have that. You don't have to do something irreversible."

Maura stared at the handle of the door, anticipating its movement. Keller faced the door as well, the doctor still in his grasp.

"I'm going to come in now," Jane said calmly.

Keller threw Maura onto the floor and pointed his gun at the door.

"Don't do it," Keller grunted.

"Jane, don't!" Maura cried out.

But the door swung open and without missing a beat, Jane put her hands in the air and backed up, keeping eye contact with Keller all the while. The disgruntled cop didn't pull the trigger. He simply aimed at the center of Jane's forehead.

"Let me take her, Keller," she said. "Let me take Maura and I'll let you run free."

Jane allowed herself a brief glance at the doctor. She was sweaty and bloody. Bruises were already forming along her face and her skirt was torn. It made Jane's heart hurt. She wanted nothing more than to scoop Maura into her arms and protect her from every possible pain. But she had to win this battle first.

"Just let her go," Jane said.

The doctor made an unconscious move, starting on a scared crawl toward Jane's feet. Before she was even halfway there, a bullet hit the wood floor next to her. The two women yelled in fear, Maura instantly going still and losing her breath.

"Don't move!" Keller barked.

He kept the gun pointed at Maura.

"I won't move, I won't move," Jane chanted. "You don't have to hurt her, Keller."

"You're right! I could just kill her and you and get out of here!" he barked, spit flying from his mouth. Jane eyed his gun, prepared to pounce when the right moment came. Maura sat looking between Jane and Keller in the dark cabin.

"Put the gun down," Jane advised.

"Don't take another step…"

"Put it down and run," she pleaded.

The series of events that unfolded next would always come back as a blur of color and noise. Thirty years later, the last thing Maura Isles would remember was the rattle of the cabin's back door. A rattle no one expected, not even Jane.

Keller instantly pulled the trigger at the sound of the door scrapping open. The bullet knocked Maura back, filling Jane with horror. Blood stained her right shoulder, spilling into a fast puddle as the doctor gasped.

In the same instant, Officer Emily Owens came bursting through the backdoor, barely visible in the shadows. Jane could see her gun was pointed at Keller. But Officer Owens was less experienced than the veteran cop. Keller pulled the trigger again, shooting Owens in the neck, just above her bullet proof vest. Red mist instantly gushed out of her wound but not before she fired three times in Keller's direction. Jane dove to the floor to get out of the line of fire. Keller hit the ground not long after. He was limp and his gaze was locked. He was dead.

It'd all happened so fast and among the three wounded bodies now in the room, Jane could only think of Maura. She scrambled on her knees to reach her and was relieved when she found the doctor's eyes were still open.

"Maura! Maura, you're okay. You're okay," Jane whispered.

"He shot me," Maura grunted.

Jane spotted the wound at her shoulder and quickly ripped off her jacket. Her hands shook uncontrollably as she wadded up the material and put pressure on the gaping hole. She was losing blood fast.

"You have to hang on, okay," Jane told her.

Maura's lips were growing more pale and her green eyes were beginning to turn glassy.

"You need to get help," she said.

"I'm not leaving you," Jane replied.

Maura grabbed onto one of Jane's hands, barely able to control her own movements. The room was beginning to spin as she fought to stay conscious.

"The radio. Go to the radio," she advised, looking toward Officer Owens.

Jane swallowed hard, terrified to leave Maura for even a second but scrambled to her legs. They were weak and she tripped next to Officer Owens. The young woman was still fighting to breathe, though her wound was clearly more severe than Maura's. Blood spilled down her throat and vest.

"Help me," Officer Owens wheezed to Jane. "Please. Help."

Jane clapped a hand over the young woman's wounded neck, her hands becoming drenched with blood.

"You shouldn't have followed me in like that," she said.

"Can't breathe…" Officer Owens gasped. "Help. Please help."

"Just hold on," Jane pleaded. Her heart was racing and her bloody fingers slipped on the radio as she pulled it up from Officer Owens' vest. "Officer down! Officer down! Unit 65 needs ambulance. We've located Dr. Isles – she's also wounded. Suspect is dead. Officer down!"

"Jane…"

Maura weakly called across the room, barely able to pull in air. The colors were fading around her and all she could do was call the woman she most longed to see.

"Please don't leave me," Officer Owens begged. She grabbed at Jane's arm and the former detective felt tears roll down her cheeks. Her brown eyes could hardly stand looking into Emily's.

"I'm sorry," Jane whispered. She squeezed the officer's hand. Another tear fell. "Help will be here soon."

Fighting the gut twisting strain of guilt, Jane clamored across the room and dropped to her knees at Maura's side. There was more blood than before. She had to kneel in a puddle of it in order to hold Maura's hand and put pressure on her shoulder.

"Jane," the doctor said. She looked up at the woman's face, a small smile managing to spread across her mouth. "You're here."

"Yes," Jane replied. "I'll always find you. I'll always take care of you."

Maura shook all over. Her teeth chattered as she continued to lose blood. She was getting sleepy again and did everything she could to focus on Jane's face.

"I love you," the doctor confessed.

"I love you too, Maura," Jane sniffled. Her partner's blood was on her shirt and hands and even her face. She glanced around the cabin. "Help is going to come soon. I just need you to hang on. Frankie and Korsak are on their way…"

"We wasted so much time," Maura whispered. Her teeth clanked together and she did everything she could to squeeze onto Jane's hand. "We wasted too much time. We should have always been…together. Now it's…it's going to be too late."

"It's not too late," Jane nearly growled. She forced the tears from her eyes and her brown gaze went serious. She leaned in as close as she could to Maura, pulling her hand up to her lips. "We have a whole life ahead of us. Me and you. Just hang on. Hang on and I promise…I promise we won't waste anymore time."

Maura shook her head.

"I'm scared Jane," she cried. "I'm going to die."

"You're not going to die," Jane exclaimed. She kissed Maura's hand. "You're going to make it. You're going to be fine."

"I love you," Maura whispered. "So much."

"Don't. Don't do that," she said. "Help! Someone get in here! Someone please fucking find us…"

"Promise me you'll be okay," Maura asked gently.

She wasn't getting enough oxygen. The room was spinning and she could hardly speak. The pain in her shoulder subsided as her body became numb.

"I'm not going to promise that," Jane snapped. "Because you're going to be fine. Just hang on."

The doctor's eyes fell shut and Jane felt panic set in. She began screaming Maura's name, shaking the woman to wake her but nothing worked. She put her ear to Maura's mouth, relieved to find that she was still breathing. She was about to try shaking her again when heavy footsteps came thundering into the cabin.

"Jane!" Frankie shouted.

"In here!" Jane screamed back. "All clear! We need help!"

Vince and Frankie paused momentarily at the door, shocked by the violent scene. The floor was covered in blood and two dead bodies were strung a short space apart. Jane hovered over Maura's limp form, covered in dark red blood. Frankie would have been sick if it weren't for his determination to help. Vince ran over to take a knee across from Jane.

"Where's she hit?" he asked.

"Shoulder. She just passed out," Jane said, her voice raspy and scared. "Someone check on Officer Owens."

"She's gone, Jane," Frankie muttered. He was already on a knee next to the officer, his finger pressed to the woman's neck.

"Fuck," Jane whimpered, unable to stop the sob from escaping. She kept it brief and turned her attention to Maura. "I don't know if she can make it, Korsak. If she can wait for an ambulance."

"She can't. It's not going to make it here, through this terrain in enough time," he whispered. "You're going to have to drive her to the nearest hospital."

Jane was already getting to her feet, putting an arm underneath Maura's knees and upper back. Korsak stepped in, helping to pick up Maura's other side.

"Frankie, we have to hurry," Jane demanded.

Maura's blood covered her forehead and she looked at her brother with unyielding determination. But the task at hand terrified Frankie. He could hardly fathom the extent of the shooting, let alone that Maura Isles was about to die.

"Jane, I don't know if…"

"You don't have a choice," Korsak barked.

They were already outside, headed to the SUV that Frankie and Korsak had arrived in. They put Maura in the backseat and Jane climbed in after.

"Nearest hospital is six miles north once you hit the main road. Don't stop," Korsak told Frankie.

The younger detective took the keys and stumbled to the driver's seat. Jane had Maura's head on her lap in the back, her hands busy keeping pressure on the gunshot wound. Frankie slammed the door shut, his knuckles going white as he gripped onto the steering wheel.

"Please, Frankie. Don't let her die on me," his sister whispered, her face visible in the rear view mirror.

Frankie swallowed past a pit of anxiety and swerved back onto the dark dirt road.


	8. Chapter 8

The Boston streets had thawed by the time Captain Frankie Rizzoli gave his niece a gun and badge for the homicide unit. It was no coincidence he'd given AJ the same identifying number as her mother – _Victor 825._ They'd both shared a somber pause in his office that day as AJ traced a thumb over the cool, shiny metal.

Her first few weeks on the job consisted of getting adjusted to her new workplace. The homicide unit didn't have a partner for her yet and AJ spent most of her time learning the ropes from other detectives. When she wasn't at the station she was at her mother's house on the North Shore.

AJ and Maura were getting along well enough. Maura was busy teaching pre-medical courses at Boston College, peer reviewing articles on several medical journals, teaching forensic seminars to law enforcement agencies, and volunteering at a low-income clinic as a general physician. Dr. Maura Isles-Rizzoli had always been busy, but since becoming a widow, she was sure to fill as many hours as she could with activities. Whenever AJ and her mother had the same hours off, they would share dinner, listen to music, or every once in a while, she could convince Maura to watch a Bruins hockey game. James made frequent visits, which also helped the tension.

But so far AJ hadn't built up the nerve to ask her mother about the Denton case. Part of her wanted to learn about it herself first. She always felt guilty for opening old wounds and bringing back terrible memories for her mother. She would wait until it was absolutely necessary to go down that path.

That's why instead she found herself huddled over a small metal table in the corner of the BPD records room, a cardboard box filled to the brim next to her. It was long past her shift and most of the other detectives had gone home for the evening. But AJ quietly stayed put, frantically reading each line of the Denton case files under a single lamp.

Her chocolate gaze lingered on one of the photographs related to her mother's kidnapping. A full close-up, color photo showed a bullet wound in Maura's shoulder. It was taken by evidence. Maura's face wasn't in the photo – just her stitches and porcelain skin – but AJ could recognize the mark anywhere. She'd seen the scar as a child and it always sparked curiosity. Her parents eventually told her Maura had been shot but didn't elaborate. Now seeing it in the flesh put an uneasy feeling in her stomach.

"Can't say I'm surprised to find you down here."

AJ jumped at the sound of her uncle's voice. Frankie appeared around the corner of one of the tall aisles of boxes.

"Didn't mean to scare you," he said.

"It's all right," AJ muttered.

She nervously shifted in her seat but made no attempt to hide the files in front of her. Frankie slowly eased in behind her, staring down at the evidence. Another photo was on the table. It was a dead female police officer. Her vest was gone and she'd been cleaned of the blood, revealing a wound at her neck.

"Denton case, huh?" Frankie asked. "Figured you'd dig this up eventually."

AJ slowly put down the photographs and adjusted the sleeve of her blazer. She wore a silk white blouse under her tweed jacket, along with pressed navy slacks. Like Jane she was stoic, tough and an officer of the law, but AJ also had Maura's fashion sense and striking femininity. It was a dangerous combination that often made her effective undercover.

"How much did they tell you about it?" Frankie asked.

"Not much. It was always a secret. They never wanted us to know about the bad times," AJ said. She grabbed the picture of the dead female officer again. "This is who Owen is named after, isn't it?"

Frankie gave a sad nod.

"Officer Emily Owens," he replied. "Jane – I mean, your ma – never forgave herself for that one."

AJ grimly picked at one of the papers.

"She blamed herself for Emily's death," she muttered.

"She told you?"

"No," AJ said. "I just know her."

Frankie found a nearby chair and carefully drug it over, taking a seat next to his niece.

"Emily helped save Maura that day," he muttered.

"What was it like?" AJ asked.

"Why are you looking into this case?" Frankie asked in return.

AJ leaned back in her chair, watching as her uncle fiddled with his gray tie. It made the salt and pepper mixed into his hair even more obvious. He raised an eyebrow at his niece.

"They never found Olivia Denton. I think she's still out there. And I think whatever web was weaved to keep it quiet needs to be broken," AJ confessed.

"Does Maura know you're doing this?"

"Yes."

"And what does she say?"

"She says not to do it," AJ shrugged. "But that shouldn't surprise you. Now will you tell me about that day?"

"What day?"

"The day mom was shot," AJ continued. "In the woods that night. You were there, weren't you?"

Frankie gave a slight frown, staring at the photos on the desk. His eyes lingered on the images of Maura's wounds. Of the bloody cabin and bodies. There was even a photo of the back of his SUV that night, covered in red.

"I didn't get there until it was over really," Frankie confessed. "I drove your mother to the hospital. An ambulance wasn't going to get there in time, and she was losing blood quickly. It was the scariest drive of my life."

"But you made it," AJ said.

"Yeah," Frankie murmured. He shook his head. "I thought Janie was going to lose it. I knew if we lost your mother, she'd never be able to live with herself."

…**30 years earlier…**

Jane ran to keep up with the gurney. Her hand was wrapped around Maura's, covered in the woman's blood. Frankie had sped as fast as he could to the hospital, even getting a police escort for the last two miles. All the while, Jane had screamed at him to go quicker and begged Maura to keep breathing.

By the time the doctors and nurses pulled the medical examiner from the backseat and put her on a gurney, she had come to. Her green eyes fluttered open as the white walls and lights blurred around her.

"Jane," she whimpered.

"I'm right here. I'm right here, Maura," Jane said. She squeezed in between one of the doctors and nearly elbowed a nurse out of the way to show Maura her face.

"Are we at the hospital?"

Her pale face twisted with pain and Jane used her other hand to push sweaty hair from Maura's forehead.

"Don't talk. The doctors are going to take care of you," Jane whispered.

"Keller?"

"He's dead. He's gone," Jane told her.

"We really need to take her into surgery," one of the doctors told Jane.

They were approaching a set of double doors where Jane wasn't allowed through, but she continued to run next to the fast-moving bed, not letting go of Maura's hand.

"Don't leave me…"

"You're going to be okay, honey, I promise," Jane said, doing her best to stay strong. Still tears welled in her eyes as the gurney stopped.

"Say goodbye here," the surgeon advised. "We need to take her _now_."

"I love you, Maura. I'm going to be there when you wake up okay? You hang on," Jane whispered hoarsely. She kissed her lips and forehead.

"I love you too," the medical examiner wheezed. She squeezed Jane's hand before letting go. Her stare was glassy again and she looked ready to fall back asleep.

"You take care of her," Jane glared at the head surgeon.

"We'll give you an update as soon as we can," the doctor nodded.

Jane kept eyes on the gurney, trained on Maura's scared face until they were out of sight behind the double doors. As soon as they were gone, Jane allowed herself to falter. Suddenly her legs were weak and the tears flooded her gaze so quickly that she could hardly see. Panic stifled her chest and she clutched at her collar, unable to breathe. It was then she saw the blood all over her. On her fingers and shirt, jeans and white shoes, beneath her nails and up her arms.

"It's okay," Frankie soothed, sneaking up behind her.

He grabbed her into a tight hug without a word, holding up his sister who quickly collapsed into him. Jane sobbed in the middle of the sterile hallway, ignoring the nurses, doctors, other patients and families. She cried heartedly onto his shoulder, allowing the absolute terror of the last thirty minutes sink in.

"I can't lose her," Jane sniffled. "I can't lose her, Frankie. I love her. I love her so much."

"You're not going to lose her," Frankie whispered, blinking back his own tears. It was rare to see his sister in such hysterics. Jane was known for keeping her calm. "Let's sit down."

He led them to a pair of chairs and helped her to sit. A few nurses lingered, watching them anxiously. He gave them a signal to give them space. Jane grabbed a few tissues from the nearby table and wiped her tear-stained cheeks.

"Shoulder wounds are sustainable. It probably didn't hit anything too serious…"

"Jane, I know you're worried, but you need to focus," Frankie cut her off.

Her eyes widened at her brother in confusion.

"This is about to get bigger than you and Maura. Agency heads, internal affairs, reporters, everyone is going to be here soon. You need to start thinking about what you're going to say," Frankie explained.

"What I'm going to say? We found Keller and…and…"

"And you didn't wait for back-up. You are not a detective anymore and you approached a suspect with a rookie police officer who is now dead," Frankie replied. "I'm not blaming you, Jane. I'm just reminding you of the facts before you get too lost in this. You need to keep your head a little longer."

Jane's stomach sank but she was also hit with renewed focus. She wrung her long, red-stained fingers together, suddenly back-tracking her mistakes. The image of Officer Owens getting shot, begging Jane to stay by her side, tormented her. She pulled in a careful breath.

"I can't leave the hospital," Jane decided. "She won't wake up without me here."

"I'm sure Internal Affairs will talk to you here," Frankie said. "We can delay as long as possible."

They looked toward the lobby. Red and blue lights could suddenly be seen in the parking lot. Police would soon be swarming, not just to find out what happened, but to show their support for the medical examiner and the deceased Officer Owens.

"I'm going to call Ma…"

"Don't Frankie."

"It's better for her to hear from me than the news in thirty minutes. Besides, she can bring you new clothes."

Jane looked down at her bloody wardrobe and frowned. Her brother squeezed her shoulder before walking away with his phone pressed to his ear. Jane ran a hand up her forehead and swallowed back more tears. She knew she was facing an intensive investigation that had the potential to ruin her career but all she cared about was Maura. She needed to be back at the woman's side. She needed to tell her how much she loved her. She needed to see that she would be okay and not picture her lifelessly strewn across her lap.

"Ma'am? Excuse me? Ma'am?"

A nurse was in front of her, doing her best to get Jane's attention. She wasn't sure how long the woman had been speaking.

"I'm sorry, what-what?" Jane stammered.

"I asked if you were hurt," the nurse said. "You're-you're covered in blood."

"It's not mine," Jane whispered.

The nurse nodded in understanding. "Would you like to get cleaned up?"

"I-I uh better wait for the police," she replied.

"Your friend will be okay," the nurse told her. She gave another empathetic glance. "I'll get you some water."

Jane's hand trembled as she pulled out her phone. Her finger hovered above the contact on the screen with regret. It was a call she hoped she'd never have to make. The dial tone rang for several beats before giving way to a voicemail. Jane cleared her throat, doing her best to not break down.

"Constance, this is Jane Rizzoli. I'm calling about Maura. Something has happened. She's been shot and she's at the hospital. We're at Sacred Heart outside Halifax. I can explain more later but you need to get here as soon as you can. I'm going to try Hope Martin as well. She deserves to know. I'll call you as soon as the doctors tell me more."

More tears fell as Jane finished the call. She stifled the desire to cry aloud, instead thanking the nurse as she handed off a bottle of water. The former detective stared off into the distance, covered in blood, silently praying for the woman she loved.

…**30 years later…**

AJ could hear the fire crackling from the living room as she took off her long peacoat in the front hall. It was a quarter to ten o'clock and she was surprised to find her mother was still awake. The house was quiet and still except for the warm glow coming down the hall. AJ slowly made her way toward the light, hands in the pockets of her slacks as she found her mother. Maura was lying on the couch, a blanket and notepad on her lap. She was busy grading papers, which were piled high on the coffee table next to her.

"You're up," AJ greeted.

"It's the end of the term," Maura said gently. She smiled up at her daughter, peering past the reading glasses on the edge of her nose. "You're home late. Tough case?"

AJ smirked, taking a place on the end of the couch near her mother's feet. Maura stretched out her legs across her daughter's lap.

"I thought you didn't like talking about my cases," AJ chuckled.

Maura simply shrugged, grabbing her mug of tea from the table.

"I like that blazer on you," the doctor changed the subject. "Herringbone?"

"Yes," AJ replied with a smile.

The two sat quietly, allowing the fire to pop between them along with the subtle churn of the ocean outside. Maura scribbled a few notes down before clearing her throat.

"So are you going to tell me about the case?"

"It's an old case," AJ answered. "The Denton case."

Maura put her pen down and nodded. "I see…"

"Uncle Frankie told me about some of what happened the day Keller took you," AJ said. "I mean, most of it was in the case files."

"It was a horrible day," Maura whispered.

AJ guiltily looked down at her hands. "I can't imagine. Do you remember much?"

"Unfortunately, yes," her mother replied. "But I was unconscious for a lot of the aftermath. I think it was harder for your mother than for me."

"Really?" AJ asked in surprise.

"Yes," Maura nodded with a slight sigh. Her cheeks fell with sadness. "And I know because I speak from experience. Whenever your mother would get hurt on the job, long before you kids, it put the fear of God in me. The thought of losing her when she got shot…it was the worst feeling. Not worse than actually losing her of course."

AJ frowned and looked away. "I'm sorry."

Suddenly her mother's hand was on hers and AJ found Maura's gaze. The doctor had stretched across the length of the couch to hold her hand.

"We both walked away that day with a lot of scars," Maura shared. "But I think it was the first time your mother was really scared. At least that's what she told me later."

"She was afraid to lose you," AJ muttered.

"Yes," Maura nodded. Her green eyes sparkled as though hit with a memory AJ couldn't see. "We'd just reconciled when Keller kidnapped me. She found me in record time. But Officer Owens died and I was wounded and your mother blamed herself."

"Yeah, I've been reading the report from Internal Affairs," AJ said.

"They made Jane out to be some irresponsible, selfish, reckless cop, which we know she wasn't," Maura replied. "You see there was a lot going on behind the scenes that I didn't realize. I was just in a hospital bed and your mother was getting grilled from all sides."

"She didn't tell you?"

"Not at first," Maura said. "She wanted me to focus on healing. But she was still shaken up and scared. So scared, she actually ran away."

"What?" AJ cut in. Her gaze widened in shock. "What do you mean ran away? I thought you two had reconciled and…"

"Oh, you have no idea about your mother and I, Alexandra," Maura smirked. "And I think maybe now you're old enough to hear the full story."

AJ watched in confusion as Maura set side her work and pulled the blanket off her lap. She slowly got up.

"Wait, where are you going?" AJ asked.

"The kitchen – I think this story requires a bottle of wine," Maura said.

…**30 years earlier…**

"So you decided to pursue the lead on your own? Even though you have no jurisdiction – and you're not even a cop?"

"I have a concealed carrier's license and I was brought on as special consult by BPD. Not to mention, I'm credentialed through the FBI…"

"You're not a fucking agent!" the internal affairs officer barked back. He and his partner sat on one side of the table across from Jane. They'd wasted little time arriving at the hospital and demanding a statement from her. Korsak and Frankie had done their best to stop it, but they were outside of Boston with little say.

"So you decided to play vigilante?" the taller of the two men asked. He had gray hair and a matching beard. Jane guessed he was a former cop, resentful of his position at internal affairs.

"I decided to search for Dr. Isles. Her life was in imminent danger and we were running out of time. So yes, I used my best judgement…"

"And is it true you have an intimate relationship with Dr. Isles?"

"Excuse me?"

"Do you have a romantic relationship with Dr. Isles? Yes or no?"

"What does that have to do with this?"

"We would like to know what motivated you – and whether or not it was a conflict of interest for Boston Police to bring you in to consult."

"So, what's your relationship with Dr. Isles?" the other officer asked. He was smaller and clearly new to the job. He wore a clean suit and kept his brown hair cut close. He stared out from a pair of thick rimmed glasses.

"Dr. Isles is my friend," Jane lied.

The men exchanged unconvinced glances.

"And your brother was on this case with you?"

"Yes," Jane replied.

"And did he know you were going after Dr. Isles on your own?"

"I left the station," Jane answered. "I didn't tell him where I was going."

"And Sergeant Korsak also let you leave to pursue this lead?"

"Again, I did not tell them where I was going."

"Why not?"

"I thought it was a lead I could handle on my own. I didn't know I'd stumble upon Maura and Keller."

"Then why go?" the gray-haired officer asked.

Jane stayed silent, clenching her bloody fingers together. She was sweating beneath her stiff clothes, still stuck in the stained shirt. Her foot tapped anxiously beneath the table as she stared the clock. She wanted to get the interview done as quickly as possible so she could be back with Maura.

"How much longer is this going to take?" Jane asked.

"Why did you take Officer Owens with you?"

"She had a patrol car and I needed a ride. She agreed to take me," Jane answered.

A lump swelled in her throat as she thought of the young officer. The woman was excited to help Jane that day. She'd likely entered the cabin in the first place just to prove herself to the former detective.

"Were you aware that she was a rookie cop – just three months on the job?"

"I didn't know how long she'd been at BPD. I knew she was new…"

"So you thought you'd manipulate her into going on this crusade with you?"

"That's not what I did."

"You were told to wait for back-up. Why didn't you?"

"I heard Dr. Isles call for help and I thought she was in danger. I told Officer Owens to stay behind as I approached the cabin."

"But she followed you."

"Yes."

"And did you fire your gun at any point during this exchange?"

"No, sir. Like I told you – Keller shot Dr. Isles as Officer Owens entered from the rear side of the cabin. He then shot Officer Owens who fired three shots and killed Keller."

"And did you provide first aid for Officer Owens?"

The question brought Jane to a standstill. She was wracked with such intense guilt that she couldn't find the words to express herself. Another lump of tears grew in her throat. She remembered Maura calling out from across the cabin. She remembered all the blood and fear.

"I did not."

"Why not?" the officer with glasses asked.

"Because her wounds were more severe than Dr. Isles'. I knew Officer Owens wouldn't make it, but I knew if I provided pressure to Maura's gunshot wound then she might survive. I had to make a choice."

"And you chose Dr. Isles; the woman that many say you've had an intimate relationship with."

"I did what I had to do."

Vince Korsak was waiting by the door when Jane exited the conference room. He gave her a sympathetic glance.

"How'd it go?" he asked.

Jane shook her head. "They want someone to go down for this. Don't say…"

"Sergeant Korsak, we'll speak with you now," the taller of the internal affairs officers announced. He gave Jane a glare before opening the door wider for Vince. The Sergeant patted her arm as he went in.

Left alone in the hall, Jane allowed her shoulders to slump. She leaned against the white wall, unmotivated to move or do anything except wait for news about Maura. Her stomach was still a tangle of nerves and if she wasn't still so deep in shock, she would have probably collapsed in tears. Instead she stared off, consumed by the memory of Maura bleeding out on the gurney. Jane placed a hand over her mouth and squeezed her eyes shut.

"Please let her be okay…"

"Janie?"

Angela appeared at the mouth of the hall, a bag over her shoulder and her face stoic against the grimness of the situation. Without a word Jane and her mother took careful steps toward each other. Angela threw her arms around her and without a fight, the brunette surrendered to the embrace.

"How is she?" Angela asked after holding her daughter for a few silent moments.

"I'm still waiting to hear from the doctors," Jane whispered.

"And you?"

"I'll be okay once I know she is," she answered.

"She'll be okay, Jane. She's strong," Angela nodded, wiping one of her daughter's tears away She did her best to not be affected by the heartbreaking image. Jane looked like something out of a horror movie in her blood-stained clothes and the permanent terror streaked across her face. "I brought you something to change into. You should clean up, Janie…"

"What if a doctor comes…"

"I'll be here. I'll get you."

Jane was too tired to argue and stumbled to the nearest bathroom. Her head was swimming. She hadn't eaten anything since morning but rather than hunger, she only battled unbearable nausea. The feeling became worse as she caught a glance of herself in the mirror. Traces of blood, Maura's blood, had found its way to her face. She already knew her clothes were dark with the mess but to see it on her skin, in her hair, and on her neck, made her tremble. She could hardly turn on the sink and frantically splashed the water across her face. She watched pink remnants of the bloody wounds swirl down the sink.

She let the droplets fall down her chin once she cleaned all the gore away. The memory of Maura, lifeless in her arms wouldn't leave her. She could see her green eyes falling shut as if she was dead. And Jane was helpless. A singular thought bullied her as she stared at her own reflection; _It's your fault. You only bring death. You only hurt the people you love; innocent people. It's your fault. _

Jane frantically pushed her way into an empty stall, retching into the toilet. A combination of nerves and leftover adrenaline made her sick. Sweat made her back sticky as she finished vomiting. She pressed her head back against the stall door and closed her eyes.

"I have to protect her," Jane murmured to herself.

By the time she finished cleaning herself up and changing into a fresh pair of clothes, Korsak, Frankie and Angela were gathered together in the hallway. They looked up at her with a sympathy that made her want to be sick again. Jane carefully made her way over, not saying a word as she took a seat next to her mother. The lobby was a short distance away, filled with uniformed officers, troopers, detectives and first responders, all waiting to see if Maura would be okay. Jane could feel their eyes on her. A television glowed in the lobby. A reporter stood a distance away from the crime scene but Jane still recognized the cabin in the background, surrounded by yellow tape. Keller's photograph flashed on the screen. Then Maura's. Then Officer Emily Owen's.

"Ms. Rizzoli?"

She perked up at the sound of the doctor's voice. A woman in surgical scrubs approached, hat in hand. Jane and the rest of her supporters bounced up to stand.

"Are you Jane?" the doctor asked.

"Yes-yes," she said.

"Before surgery, Maura gave us permission to tell you her condition. She says you're her partner," the doctor continued.

Jane nodded, ready to pass out as she waited for the news. Angela stood behind her, placing a hand on the small of her back.

"How is she?"

"She's going to make a full recovery," the doctor nodded.

Frankie and Korsak gave sounds of relief behind her and tears of gladness sprang to Jane's eyes. Angela immediately wrapped an arm around her daughter.

"The bullet passed through her right shoulder clean. It was a simple procedure, but she lost a lot of blood," the doctor continued. "She also sustained a hip fracture. We'll insert screws during surgery tomorrow, but we wanted to give her some rest. She's sustained a lot of trauma; lacerations and several bruises to her face…I know you brought her in, but I don't want you to be alarmed when you see her."

Jane nodded vigorously with every word the doctor said, doing her best to stay composed and rational. She would need to be strong for Maura.

"Can I see her?" she asked.

"Yes," the doctor nodded. "Just you for now. She's on a lot of pain killers and may not be coherent when she wakes up. Follow me."

"Tell her we love her," Angela whispered, giving Jane's hand a squeeze before she took off down the hall.

Maura was asleep when Jane entered the hospital room. The lights were dimmed above her bed but even in the pale illumination, she could see a purple bruise around the doctor's left eye and swelling around her cheek. Dried up blood surrounded a nasty cut on Maura's lower lip. A breathing tube rested underneath her nose and even in the drug induced sleep, she looked like she was in pain.

Jane grabbed onto Maura's limp hand, unable to keep a sob from escaping her.

"I'm so sorry," she sniffled. "I'm so sorry I let this happen to you."

She carefully tucked a piece of Maura's hair behind her ear. Jane watched her chest rise and fall, listening to the monitors track every breath and heartbeat. The machines were a strange comfort, assuring her that she was still alive.

After thirty minutes, Jane rested her head on the edge of the mattress, hand still wrapped around Maura's. That's how the doctor found her when she finally opened her eyes. She blinked the haziness out of her gaze, first taking in the pristine hospital room. Her body ached with pain and she recognized an IV coming out of her arm. And then she spotted Jane hunched over in a chair at her bedside, her dark head resting uncomfortably near her lap. Maura reached out, gently intertwining her fingers with Jane's dark locks. The lanky woman sat up.

"Your awake," Jane said, her brown eyes sparkling with childlike delight.

"Hi," Maura managed softly. Her throat was dry from unconsciousness and she hid the pain that shot through her shoulder.

"How are you feeling?" Jane asked. She kept her voice low as if speaking too loudly would hurt the doctor. She rubbed her thumb across Maura's hand as she held it.

"I'm okay," Maura whispered. "How are you?"

Jane's mouth quirked into a familiar, sarcastic smile. She shook her head. "Only you would wake up in a hospital bed and ask how I am."

Maura managed a weak smirk back, filling Jane with warmth. Despite her injuries, the doctor's eyes glowed with love.

"I'm going to be okay," Maura told her.

Tears formed in Jane's eyes. She brought Maura's hand to her lips and kissed it. She hid her face as it faltered with more sobs.

"Hey, look at me," Maura said, her voice cracking. "Jane, honey, look at me…"

Jane gave a few more whimpers before looking up. The doctor's gaze held sympathetic tears.

"I thought I lost you," Jane confessed. "I was so scared. I thought I lost you, Maura."

"I'm right here. And I'm safe because of you," she said.

She reached out, wires still dangling from her wrist, and caressed the side of Jane's face.

"This my fault. You're here because of me…."

"Shhhh," Maura cut her off. "Please, don't do that. We're here now and it's not your fault. I held on because of you Jane. For this."

A few tears spilled down the doctor's cheek. Jane's whimpers stopped and her feelings of inadequacy slowly melted away.

"I love you," Maura whispered. "I love you so much."

"I love you too."

Jane leaned in, careful to not bump or hurt Maura in any way as she softly kissed her bruised lips. The fact that someone had hurt the doctor so badly filled Jane with renewed rage. The tenderness of Maura's lips and the way she tried not to flinch at Jane's touch had the brunette swallowing back more shame. When she pulled back, Maura grabbed her arm.

"Stay with me," she whispered.

"I'm not going anywhere," Jane assured.

"Hold me?" Maura asked softly, her eyes glassy and scared.

"I don't want to hurt you…"

"You won't," she insisted.

Maura carefully scooted over on the small hospital bed, making room for Jane, nearly pulling her down to the mattress. Jane cautiously maneuvered onto the bed, wrapping a long arm around Maura who instantly sunk into her. Jane's smell brought her comfort. Maura pressed her face into her shirt and let more silent, content tears spill down her battered face. Jane gently stroked Maura's hair and rested her head back against the pillow.


	9. Chapter 9

Maura woke up screaming that first morning in the hospital. She settled as she realized where she was, soothed by Jane's tender arms and the sweet assurances she whispered in her ear.

"It's okay, you're safe. You're with me," Jane kissed her temple, tracing a comforting hand along Maura's back. The doctor's terror startled her and only reinforced the guilt Jane already felt. Even as Maura calmed down, still squeezing onto her hand for dear life, she could hardly bare to see the bruising on the woman's immaculate features or the stitches that held together the grisly bullet wound on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry," Maura gulped when she could breathe again. She allowed her jade eyes to flash up into Jane's. They were still petrified but she was back to her rational self at least. "I think I was dreaming I was back with him. Back in the van."

"It's alright. It's normal," Jane said gently, remembering all the nightmares and traumas that she relived – especially within the first twenty-four hours. She tucked a piece of golden hair behind Maura's ear and kissed her cheek again.

"I'm glad you're here," the doctor sniffled. She leaned in to kiss Jane's lips but a gasp escaped her instead. She couldn't decide if the pain came from her shoulder or hip, but tears sprang to her eyes.

"Don't move. I'm going to get the doctor," Jane told her, scrambling off the hospital bed.

"I'm okay; don't leave me," Maura nearly whimpered. Even with all her injuries, Jane leaving seemed worse than any other fate. She would have endured hours more of pain just to be near the brunette.

"I'll come right back, I promise," she assured.

Jane kissed her forehead before scurrying out into the hall but even then Maura recognized a change in her. She seemed rattled and distance. Maura didn't doubt that Jane loved her and was happy to see her safe, but she was hesitant in their interactions as though the doctor might still break. As though she was somehow the source of her pain.

The rest of the day passed in a blur. First the doctors updated on her condition and being of the medical profession herself, Maura drilled them with questions about procedures, methods, and her recovery. Jane stayed by her side all the while, trying to suppress a smirk as the medical examiner contradicted and quizzed her own surgeons from a hospital bed. When they left, Jane raised her eyebrows.

"It's too bad you couldn't operate on yourself, Dr. Isles. In fact, I'm sure the surgeons here would prefer it," she snarked.

"They're adequate," Maura decided, relieved just to hear Jane joking again.

"Well, they saved your life."

She sat on a stool by Maura's bedside, her brown gaze turning forlorn as she spoke. The medical examiner reached out and touched her.

"No. You saved my life," she said.

"I'm the reason you're in this hospital bed to begin with…"

"I wish you would stop saying that," Maura cut her off seriously.

Before more could be exchanged, two men in suits entered, rudely pushing open the hospital room door. Jane instantly retracted her hand from the doctor's, which Maura thought strange but had no time to linger on.

"Dr. Isles, I'm Tim O'Neil– this is my partner Nathan Harper. We're from Internal Affairs and we need to ask you some questions…" the gray-haired man introduced himself with the same brashness as his entrance. Maura was instantly off put by him, but it was Jane who launched into attack mode, popping up from her seat.

"Jesus, she just woke up. Why don't you give her some time?" Jane snapped.

"Oh stand down Rizzoli," Tim glowered bitterly. "You shouldn't even be in here and you know it. I could put it in my report…"

"Screw your report; it's a bunch of horse shit anyway," she hissed.

"Keep it up and I'll make sure you not only never step in another precinct but the FBI kicks you out on your Italian ass so fast..."

Maura gasped, surprised at how heated both parties became in such a short amount of time. While she took an instant dislike to Tim O'Neil, she worried more for her partner's future.

"Jane," Maura warned. It was amazing that it took only the doctor's voice to bring the bold Jane Rizzoli to a halt. She wasn't happy with Maura's scolding, even flashing her a surprised look in outrage, but bowed her head and went silent nonetheless.

"That's right," Tim smirked. "Listen to your girlfriend."

Jane stiffened, prepared to fire back, but it was Maura who spoke before she could.

"I believe _you're _the one out of line now O'Neil," the doctor snapped.

Tim and his partner seemed to immediately regret upsetting the medical examiner, who far outranked them in reputation and status.

"Dr. Isles…."

"Don't worry about it," Jane glared at Maura. It made the doctor immediately regret speaking up. She'd only meant to soothe the situation, but she realized she made it worse. "We all know internal affairs investigators are just want to be detectives that couldn't make the cut. They've already made my mind up about me; don't let it sway you."

Maura wanted to stop her, to say Jane's name again in protest, but she knew it would only make things worse. She watched the former detective swiftly exit, immediately feeling a sad emptiness overtake her. Maura glared at the Internal Affairs investigators, folding her arms across her chest as she lay in the hospital bed.

"Let's finish this quickly," she muttered.

Whatever problem Tim and Nathan appeared to have with Jane, they were straight forward and concise with Maura. The younger, glasses wearing Nathan handled most of the questions, asking Maura to recount all the painful details of her kidnapping and rescue. She did her best to describe each sequence with scientific precision, but still found her heart rate increasing whenever she mentioned Keller's name. She still felt the searing pain of a bullet ripping through her shoulder and the fear of dying in Jane's arms. Her hands shook as she told the investigators everything she could, but she felt paralyzed without Jane at her side. Maura knew that it was just symptoms of post traumatic stress, but it didn't make her panic subside any quicker.

Jane returned as soon as internal affairs left, slipping into a place on the edge of Maura's bed. She immediately nestled back into the former detective, resting her head against the woman's bony chest. Jane rubbed her arm, kissing the side of her head. They were still shell-shocked. Still reeling. It reminded her of the time they'd both been cornered by Charles Hoyt – only now she could find solace in Jane's embrace.

"You want to talk about it?" Jane asked tenderly.

"Not yet," Maura whispered.

Angela and Frankie visited next. The Rizzoli matriarch wiped away tears at the sight of Maura. She truly did consider the doctor another daughter and showered her with ample affection. During the last year after Paris, Maura had kept her distance from Angela. The break-up with Jane was too painful and having an intimate relationship with her ex's mother seemed inappropriate. But Angela acted as if the separation never happened – as if Maura never disappeared from their lives, welcoming her back with the same maternal tenderness the doctor once found comfort in. Even Frankie kissed the top of her head, thanking God that she was okay.

It was here, surrounded by the Rizzolis, that Maura would remember feeling as though she was finally back home with her true family.

She was taken in for a second surgery before noon. She'd fractured her left hip during the rough van ride, and they were inserting temporary screws to help with the healing. Jane held her hand as far as the doctors would let her, stroking her hair and kissing her carefully on the cheek. Despite the tumultuous moments following her kidnapping, Maura had never felt safer.

When she woke up from surgery, Constance Isles was at her bedside. Maura blinked several times in confusion.

"Mother?" she whispered.

"Don't strain yourself, darling, but yes, it's me," Constance smiled. She sat erect and immaculate at her adopted daughter's bedside, tracing a careful hand on Maura's forearm.

"How did you…"

"Jane called me almost immediately. I got on the first plane out of Venice," Constance said. At the mention of the woman's name, Maura looked around the room, wanting to see Jane's face just for comfort. "Don't worry; she stepped out a few minutes ago to eat. It was hard for Angela and me to convince her you'd be okay for awhile without her. She's been so vigilant at your bed side. She cares about you very much…"

"She loves me," Maura replied without thinking. "And I love her."

"I know," Constance whispered. "I'm glad you have each other. It's all I've ever wanted for you."

The two Isles women exchanged soft, knowing smiles. It was the most they'd ever say about her relationship with Jane - but there was also nothing more that needed to be said. She wondered if Constance always knew, all those years ago when Jane helped re-establish a relationship between the mother and daughter.

"Jane also said she called Dr. Martin," Constance said.

Maura immediately turned pink, sinking down into the pillows.

"Mother, I…"

"Please don't apologize. You have every right to want a relationship with your biological mother," Constance assured. The classy, older Isles did raise a confident eyebrow. "Though, it appears Dr. Martin couldn't pull herself away from her work in Ghana to see you. I hate to say I overheard the conversation Jane had with her and I thought the detective might fly down and accost Dr. Martin in person…"

Maura frowned. Since meeting Hope, it'd been nothing but a series of disappointments. She couldn't say the latest surprised her.

"Jane told me about Cailin and how you gave her a kidney. She told me about how resistant Dr. Martin was toward getting to know you…"

"It's hard for her," Maura murmured.

"I wish you would have told me," Constance whispered. Her dark eyes, so different than Maura's, shimmered with a hint of sadness.

The medical examiner shook her head. "I didn't tell you because it just confirmed what we both already knew. You're my real mother. You always have been and you always will be."

Constance stayed in Massachusetts for the first week of Maura's recovery – the longest she'd ever been in town for her daughter.

The next hours were a parade of doctors and visitors. Vince, Frankie, Angela, Nina, even Lieutenant Sean Cavanagh, came with well wishes. Jane stayed with her all the while, shooing people out the minute Maura showed signs of fatigue or pain. The distractions however were somewhat welcome. Jane still seemed uneasy and preoccupied. She held Maura's hand and watched her like a hawk, but her mind was elsewhere, and it wasn't lost on the doctor.

That night, rather than sharing the bed with Maura, Jane slept on a cot right next to her. She insisted she was worried about bumping the doctor's fragile hip. And while she held Maura's hand throughout the entire night, kissing her and stroking her hair until the doctor finally fell asleep, the distance was still there.

Jane was gone when Maura woke up the next morning.

She didn't wake up screaming but Keller was still there in her dreams, his hands on her, threatening to kill her. Maura was drenched in sweat and bolted up out of breath. She jumped at the sound of a man's voice next to her.

"It's all right, it's all right," Frankie soothed. He put his palms up in surrender, doing his best to appear non-threatening.

"Where's Jane?" Maura asked him.

The middle Rizzoli turned grim.

"She had to speak with internal affairs again," Frankie said.

"It's bad isn't it?" Maura muttered. "She won't talk to me about it Frankie…"

"It's nothing for you to worry about," he insisted.

"Just because I'm in a hospital bed doesn't mean you all need to treat me like I'm fragile. Quite honestly, it's starting to irritate me. I'm the Medical Examiner for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, I can handle the details of my own case..."

"IA wants someone to answer for Officer Owens death. Jane blames herself – and it doesn't help that she's not a cop," Frankie explained, doing his best to skip over the details. He knew Jane would want to share with Maura herself.

"Officer Owen's death was Keller's fault and his alone," Maura insisted. "I made that clear in my statement yesterday."

"It's complicated," Frankie said.

His response caused the medical examiner's brow to furrow in anger. She was about to jump in, to rationalize and explain the baseness of his words, but the door swung open and her team of doctors entered. Frankie happily jumped up from his seat, glad to avoid a conversation about the case. The doctors informed Maura that she would be released that afternoon. Her bullet wound was healing nicely and there'd been no damage to her organs. Her hip would take a few months of rehab and she needed to use a cane to get around for the first few weeks. Maura wasn't particularly thrilled about it but was also more than eager to get out of the hospital.

Jane didn't arrive until two hours later, her shoulders slumped, and her face defeated, though she forced a smile when she saw Maura.

"I'm sorry I was gone for so long," Jane said hoarsely.

She kissed the doctor's forehead before sitting down. Maura watched her closely, doing her best to hold back a frown. She found herself wanting more of Jane's attention and affection but instead only felt the woman's anxiety.

"They're releasing me from the hospital," Maura shared. "I'll have physical therapy and a cane but it will be nice to go home."

"That's great news," Jane smiled. Her brown eyes were still sad and Maura tilted her head to the side, signaling she knew something else was afoot.

"How'd it go with internal affairs?"

"They just wanted to uh…follow up on that night," Jane muttered.

"Frankie told me they're trying to hold someone responsible for Emily Owen's death?" Maura asked.

Jane bowed her head, hiding the emotion that flickered across her features. Maura reached out, ignoring the ache that radiated in her shoulder, and grabbed onto her hand.

"Please talk to me, honey," the doctor whispered.

"She was just twenty-two years old," Jane mumbled, head still hidden. She traced a thumb over Maura's comforting hand. "She looked up to me and she followed me in there."

"She was a cop in her own right and she made her own decision," Maura said seriously. "There's nothing you could have done…"

"I didn't even try to help her. I was too busy trying to keep you alive," Jane confessed. "And you…you shouldn't have even been…"

"Don't say it."

"I watched you die," Jane told her, finally looking up. Her eyes welled with tears and she looked at Maura with a distance that put knots in the medical examiner's stomach. "I can't get it out of my head. What would I have done if I lost you? If you died because of me?"

"I'm alive and I'm safe, Jane. And I'm only those things because of you," Maura said. She was crying now as well, squeezing onto Jane's hand harder. "I don't like this. I don't like that you're not speaking to me or that you hardly look at me…"

"I think it would be better for you, if I wasn't around anymore."

"What?" Maura nearly shouted. She let go of Jane's hand. "What are you talking about?"

"I put you in danger, I've complicated things for the people I care about," she stammered. "I'm going to go back to Quantico…"

"You're what? No," Maura cut her off. "Jane, you're being irrational…"

"It's the most sensible thing I can do, Maura," Jane barked. She straightened up, no longer teary but stone cold. It was much worse than before. The doctor felt more sobs fill her chest but held them back. "This way everyone can move on from the case. It will pass over once I'm out of the picture…"

"And what about us?" Maura asked. "Huh? What about me and you?"

"I love you more than anything," Jane whispered, her brown gaze twinkling as she leaned in closer. "Which is why I have to let you go. You never wanted this anyway. When we were in Paris, you knew it was a bad idea and I should've just stayed away. Whoever made Keller do this is still out there and they'll use you against me again, if they know we're together. I can't put you in more danger."

"No. No that is bullshit," Maura said lowly.

Her green eyes were fiercer than Jane ever remembered them and her cursing was intensely out of character.

"I've known you to be many things Jane Rizzoli, but a coward has never been one of them. But if you run away from this, you'll be a coward. You'll be someone, I've never known," Maura told her. "We love each other. And being together isn't going to put me in any more danger than it has before…"

"I can't do this," Jane shook her head. "I can't be with you in good conscience, knowing that you almost died because of me. That a madman, took you and drugged you, hit you and put his hands all over you, because he wanted to hurt me. I won't have it."

"Don't do this, Jane," Maura whispered. Another plump tear rolled down her cheek, staining her hospital gown. "I'm begging you, please don't do this."

It felt like Paris all over again, except the roles were reversed now. It was Jane insisting they couldn't be together while Maura asked her not to act on fear.

"I love you," Jane told her.

"Then don't go. Don't be like everyone else," the doctor cried. "Don't make the same mistake we did in Paris. I should've never let you leave that day and I had to live with that mistake for a year. Don't put me through that again…"

"I'm sorry, Maura," Jane said. It broke her heart to see the doctor in distress, knowing she was the one behind it. But in her grief and the difficulty of the last forty-eight hours, going back to Quantico seemed like the only solution. "I know it doesn't seem fair right now."

"It's irrational. It's selfish. It's based on fear," Maura glared. She wanted nothing more than to cower into Jane's arms. To smell her and kiss her and lose herself in the woman one more time, begging her to stay.

Jane frowned. She leaned in and kissed the side of Maura's cheek, holding back tears. Before she could leave, the doctor clutched onto her hand.

"Don't. Don't walk out that door," Maura demanded.

Jane hesitated. Her heart thumped with desire and pain. She wanted Maura more than she wanted anyone. She wanted to kiss her again, to hold her forever, and quit the game they'd been playing for the last eight years. But she let go of the doctor's hand, fighting every instinct in her being.

"I love you, Maura," she whispered.

And in a flash, Jane Rizzoli exited the hospital room, leaving a whimpering Dr. Maura Isles behind.

* * *

_Authors Note: I know this part may be painful but I can assure you, Jane & Maura are about to get married and raise three children - so I hope you stick with me! Thank you to all the readers that have done that already and especially to those who have left reviews - it keeps me going. I'm glad to say I know how this story ends, which is a rarity for me with fanfiction and I'm very excited to share it. As I work toward that end, I'll keep you updated with my process and where I'm going with the plot as I know I've woven this one pretty deep. Hope to hear from you along the way - SJ._


	10. Chapter 10

AJ Rizzoli woke up out of breath. She'd had a rare dream of her mother. It'd been more than a decade since Jane's death, but AJ saw her face so clearly that she thought it'd been real.

"You okay?"

Her younger brother lingered in the entryway of the living room, his dark brown eyes – identical to Jane & AJ's – watching her in confusion. AJ followed his gaze, spotting two empty wine bottles on the coffee table and her mother asleep at the other end of the couch.

AJ slowly remembered the night before. The long hours they'd spent in front of the fire, feet in each other's laps, glasses of wine in hand, as Maura shared the forgotten moments of 30 years before. She told her daughter about the day she was kidnapped and shot, how she feared for her life when Richard Keller killed a traffic cop on the side of the highway, how she was certain she was going to die. Sometimes Maura would pause in the dark, sipping on her drink or staring off. AJ would give her mother's knee a squeeze and assure that she didn't need to share anymore. But she did. She told AJ how Jane had been the hero who tracked her down, how Officer Emily Owens had been killed, and how she'd woken up in the hospital in Jane's arms.

They'd fallen asleep after Maura told her about Jane's emotional exit from the hospital. AJ could see even now it brought her mother heartache. She frowned as she watched her sleep.

"What the hell happened?" he asked.

AJ ignored his question. "What are you doing here?"

She hadn't seen her other brother, twenty-four year old Owen Patrick Rizzoli, since returning to Boston. And before that when she was in New York, their visits and exchanges were sparse. While time had passed he still looked like the rambunctious baby of the family AJ remembered. His brown hair was a mess, with a few curly locks falling into his line of sight. He looked like his uncle Frankie – though he was most often compared to his uncle Tommy when it came to personality.

"I'm here for brunch," Owen told her. He kept his voice low because their mother was sleeping but he held clear disdain for his sister. They'd drifted apart after Jane's death. Owen entered a rebellious phase, one that had yet to end, and AJ resented him for causing Maura extra grief.

"Brunch?" she asked. Her head hurt from the wine and she'd slept at a strange angle on the couch, making her muscles stiff.

"Yeah, mom has us over on the second Saturday of every month. Of course, you wouldn't know since you abandoned the family and ran away to New York…"

"First of all, fuck you. Second, I didn't run away."

"You broke mom's heart when you left, and you know it."

"Oh, like you do every time you get your dumb ass in trouble…"

"No fighting," Maura cut in.

Her children looked over in surprise. The doctor's eyes were still closed as she grumbled. It reminded them of childhood – she could manage to scold them in her sleep.

"Sorry," they apologized.

Maura yawned as a phantom pain shot through her hip and shoulder. It was as if talking about her kidnapping the night before literally reopened old wounds.

"Looks like I missed out on some party," Owen said.

"Alexandra and I were just having a long talk," Maura replied, raising an eyebrow at her daughter.

Owen wandered into the kitchen and the doctor slowly got up, kissing the top of AJ's head before joining her youngest. She grabbed Owen's face with both hands and kissed his forehead. Maura's love for her children was unshakeable and palpable. Whatever warmth she missed out on her own childhood, she was sure to bestow upon her kids tenfold, even as they entered adulthood.

"I'll put on some coffee," Owen smirked. "I think you two need it."

"Ugh, yeah," AJ mumbled, sitting at the kitchen island.

"We're home!" another familiar voice shouted from the foyer. The sound of laughter and the front door slamming followed. Rosalyn the dog, barked and yelped happily, darting back and forth across the wood floors ahead of the new arrivals.

AJ squeezed her forehead against the pain of her hangover. "God, do you have to yell?" she grumbled.

"Good morning boys," Maura greeted, beaming from ear to ear. She opened her arms wide as James and TJ Rizzoli appeared. Both men towered above her and had to crouch down to reach her. "How were your shifts?"

"I delivered three babies last night," James said, kissing his mother's cheek. He was still in his hospital scrubs.

"And I helped stop a bank robbery over in Jamaica Plains," TJ announced, giving his aunt a bear hug.

Thomas Edward Rizzoli Jr. carried on the family law enforcement legacy long before his younger cousin could. But fist he'd joined the Army out of high school – much to his family's dismay. Fortunately, his aunt Jane had a contact in the military, and he was assigned to serve under a General Casey Jones, who kept him relatively safe while on tour. When he returned to the states, TJ joined BPD. But rather than pursue a career as a detective like his aunt and uncle, he joined the SWAT team – a position that suited his immense size and energy.

Since his birth, Maura and Jane, had been close with Tommy's son. They were there for every big event; his birth, his baptism, first day of kindergarten, tee-ball and birthday parties. When he was seven, Lydia moved to California to be with her new husband and TJ chose to stay in Boston with his father and the rest of the Rizzoli's. Tommy was clean and straight-laced for most of those years – but trouble resurfaced when TJ was about eleven. Tommy was pulled over for a fourth DUI and sentenced to five years in prison. TJ would spend that time with his aunts Maura and Jane as guardians, and even after Tommy's release, he considered them more like mothers than his own parents. For the other Rizzoli children it was just as natural. AJ especially looked up to him and often said she had three brothers.

"You got the Jamaica Plains robbery?" AJ perked up. "I knew that was you…"

"Don't be jealous," TJ winked, wrapping her into a headlock. "How's homicide treating you?"

"It's going well," she replied, pushing her cousin away.

"Yeah? Uncle Frankie told me you're looking into the Denton case," he said.

The sentence brought the noisy kitchen to silence. TJ blushed as if realizing he'd revealed a secret he wasn't meant to share.

"You're re-opening the Denton case?" Owen asked first. He looked between his sister and cousin in confusion.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have said anything," TJ muttered. His dark eyes flashed apologetically to his aunt, but Maura shook her head.

"It's okay, I've known about it," the doctor said placidly.

"And you're okay with it?" Owen snapped. He looked around the room. "Am I the only one who didn't know?"

"Owen, it's not a big deal," AJ sighed.

"Not a big deal? Ma is dead because she went down that rabbit hole, trying to solve something that was never going to be solved. And all those demons tormented this family until it finally took one of us…"

"Owen, sweetheart, please," Maura whispered, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"I won't calm down," he barked. "I'm tired of everyone acting like I'm the crazy screw up! Like I should just move on after everything that happened. AJ goes and decides to reopen the case and no one blinks an eye? That's not fair!"

"None of it's fair Owen," AJ shouted back.

"Guys, come on," James sighed, always playing the peacekeeper as the middle child.

"Can't we just eat pancakes?" TJ suggested.

"We all lost the same mother. It hurts all of us just as much," AJ continued, angered by Owen's tendency to center on his own grief.

"You weren't there. You don't have to live knowing that she's gone because of you," he snapped. "You didn't have to watch her die."

The youngest Rizzoli, another baby-faced brunette that pulled at Maura's heart strings, wasn't a troublemaker without a reason. Unlike his siblings, Owen was there that day. He was the one Jane died trying to protect. His issues with discipline, drugs, and alcohol came as little surprise in many ways, and while Maura didn't mean to be lenient with him, she couldn't help but sympathize and hurt for her son. Even now as she stayed quiet, attempting to not take sides with either of her children, her heart broke for Owen.

"You don't get a monopoly on grief," AJ told him. She lowered her voice but remained fierce in her convictions. "We've all coped in our own ways. You can't judge me for how I've chosen to move forward."

"No but I can judge you for disappearing for the last ten years and then showing up to dig through everyone's old wounds…"

"Okay, okay," James cut in. "I think that's enough for one day. How about you go back to your corners and we enjoy some breakfast? Because I worked a double and TJ just got off graveyard and you two are grumpy enough that food can only help the cause."

"Fine," AJ murmured, flicking Owen one last glare.

"Whatever," he replied, shuffling back into the kitchen.

"Thank you, Jamie," Maura whispered to her son, squeezing his arm as she passed. She certainly had more to say about the situation and understood there was healing that needed to happen between family members, but letting the situation diffuse itself seemed like the easiest course of action. James Rizzoli had an uncanny ability to do just that. He gave his mother a nod before nudging his sister.

"Come on, I didn't catch the Bruins game last night – I set up mom's DVR…"

"Yes, and I don't appreciate you taking up all the memory James Louis Rizzoli," Maura scolded, rolling up her sleeves in the kitchen.

"I need coffee first," AJ grumbled.

"Yes, someone get your sister coffee – she's worse than your mother without it."

The Rizzoli boys froze in shock, all staring at their matriarch with gaping mouths. Only AJ seemed unaffected.

"What?" Maura asked finally.

"You just never talk about Ma," James replied gently. "I mean, you do sometimes, just not like that."

"She talks about her with me," AJ said nonchalantly.

"I didn't realize…" Maura murmured.

She suddenly felt embarrassed, almost ashamed, for not speaking of her wife. The woman who had been the absolute foundation of their family. How had she so quickly erased her name from her lips or stopped sharing their sweet memories with their children? The family they'd worked so hard to build and grow. It wasn't until that moment, in the kitchen with their adult children, that she realized how much she'd cut off. It also became apparent to everyone else, how vital AJ was in in bringing their mother back to those golden days. To remembering and speaking of the Jane Rizzoli they all loved and missed.

"Here," Owen said, sliding his older sister a hot cup of coffee.

"Thank you," AJ nodded.

"Ah, thank God, a truce," James smiled.

"Good, because all this arguing has distracted from my very important announcement," TJ interjected.

The tallest, strongest, and oldest of the clan had unbuttoned his uniform top, revealing a black t-shirt with the words SWAT underneath. His dark eyes were a little sunken in, his hair greasy, from a long night on patrol. Still a wide, Tommy Rizzoli-esque grin, stretched across his face.

"What's the announcement?" Maura asked her nephew.

"Sarah and I are getting married," he smiled.

The kitchen erupted with congratulations and excitement. Maura got on her tip toes hug him and his cousins gave him high-fives.

"About time you make an honest woman out of her," AJ told him.

"Well…" TJ paused. "There's something else."

"Uh oh," Owen muttered under his breath.

"She's pregnant," he revealed.

"I knew it!" James shouted with a hearty laugh.

"What do you mean you knew it?"

"Well, Sarah and I work together," James explained. "And she was getting a little fuller in the chest region and…"

"Why were you looking at her chest!" TJ snapped, smacking the back of his cousin's head.

"I'm a doctor!" James defended himself with a chuckle.

"Don't hit him," AJ put in, smacking TJ's head in return.

"Not hitting children!" Maura shouted, though the small squabble was hardly a fight. It brought a smile to her face, reminding her of family dinners and loud holidays. She could still imagine Jane in the mix, laughing harder and shouting more among the little Rizzolis, than anyone else.

"What do you think aunt Maura?" TJ asked her.

"About Sarah?" she clarified. It became clear that her nephew took her approval more seriously than anyone else's. It warmed her heart. "I'm very happy for you sweetie. And I like Sarah very much – this family could certainly use a nurse. Granted, I would advise her against marrying a police officer…"

"Mother!" AJ scolded.

"It's a dangerous line of work," Maura clarified.

"Aunt Maura, you married a cop, married into a family of cops, and then raised more cops," TJ grinned. "I don't think you're the best person to dish out that advice."

"Well raising cops wasn't my intention but point taken," Maura winked. "How will you propose?"

"Hadn't gotten that far," TJ admitted, pouring himself coffee. "How did aunt Jane propose? Or how did you propose? Actually, who proposed to who?"

All eyes landed on Maura. Again, it hit her that she'd hardly spoken about Jane for years. She did her best to ignore the guilt in her stomach. The kids had huddled around the kitchen island and AJ gave her mother an encouraging nod. Maura could see Jane shining through the young woman again telling her to continue.

"It wasn't very traditional and it's a little complicated," the doctor started sheepishly.

"I want to hear it mom," Owen smiled.

"Okay," Maura sighed. She leaned forward and stared at her interlaced fingers, suddenly seeing the day clearly. "I had just been shot and your mother broke up with me at the hospital…"

…**30 years earlier…**

The poised and strong Dr. Maura Isles, Medical Examiner for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, all but crumpled the moment Jane Rizzoli walked out. The tears rolled freely, and the pain of her physical injuries paled in comparison to the agony of her heart. She wanted to sob out, but this was more than sadness. She was struck silent by utter devastation.

By the time Constance entered the room, Maura stared off, her cheeks stained with tears.

"What's wrong?" she asked her.

"Please just take me home," the doctor replied, refusing to look at her mother.

Constance's lips trembled with sympathy at her daughter's distress. She reached out and gently touched her uninjured shoulder. Maura shrugged it away.

"What's happened?" Constance asked. The realization hit her as she glanced around the room. "Where's Jane?"

Maura swallowed past another pit of tears.

"Please, mother. Please take me home," she whispered distantly.

The silence at the house on Beacon Hill had never been more soul-crushing. During their year of separation, Maura had gotten used to no longer having Jane around. She'd learned to erase the memories of the brunette drinking coffee in the kitchen, or watching baseball in the living room, or curling next to her in the bedroom. But now it hit her all over again. She was reminded of Jane's absence with every breath.

The days felt long and passed with unshakeable apathy. In a move that was completely out of character, Maura spent most of her time mindlessly watching television or flipping through magazines. She only managed to give minimal energy at her physical therapy appointments. Other than that, she hardly ate, certainly didn't cook, and slept only a few hours each night despite the strong pain killers prescribed for her injuries. She resigned herself to misery. Even if work had been an option to distract her, Maura wasn't sure if she'd revel in it like she had before. For the first time, she couldn't imagine her future. She couldn't imagine making it off the couch or pushing herself through life against such heartbreak.

Her mother stayed at the house all the while. Maura told her she could leave once she settled in, but for the first time that the doctor could remember, Constance stayed. She tried to get Maura to eat and even to lesser success, she attempted to get her to speak, but it was to little avail.

Maura called Jane only once. That night after the former detective left, Maura hesitantly dialed, only to get her voicemail. The doctor promptly hung up, refusing to leave a message.

A few knocks on the door indicated visitors. Korsak came but Maura told her mother to turn him away. When Frankie and Nina tried to see her, Maura nearly hid. She couldn't bear to see Jane's brother. She wondered if he knew that Jane left her. If he'd spoken to her since. She wanted to ask him if Jane was suffering as much as she was. She wanted to know that she wasn't the only one who could no longer see the light.

"Angela is here to see you darling," Constance announced on the fifth day.

Maura was in her usual spot on the couch, watching a reality television program that consisted of fighting, screeching, and poor grammar. Her mother's announcement about Angela made her nauseous.

"Tell her I'm asleep," Maura said dryly.

"I can see that's not true," Angela replied.

The doctor's face dropped as the woman's voice cut through the room. Maura slowly turned to find the Rizzoli matriarch with a face that was crestfallen but strong. She sat next to Maura on the couch without asking for permission.

"I'll leave you two to talk," Constance told them.

Maura realized the two women had conspired against her and bit on her lower lip with resentment. Angela grabbed the remote control, turning down the blaring TV. Her hazel eyes searched Maura for some sign of acknowledgement.

"Have you heard from her?" the doctor finally asked.

It hurt to say the words. The anticipation hurt even worse, watching Angela's mouth drop with a frown.

"Only once, to tell me she was going back to Quantico. She won't take my calls," Angela said. She looked like she wanted to cry. "She won't speak to Frankie either."

"Did she tell you why she was going?" Maura asked.

"No – she just said that it was best for everyone," she answered.

Maura shook her head, tears filling her eyes.

"It certainly doesn't feel that way, does it?" the doctor sniffled.

"Oh, sweetheart," Angela said, grabbing Maura's hand. She thought of pulling away, not wanting to be touched in her intense sorrow, but stayed put and looked down. "What happened? Do you know why she would do this?"

"She said she was protecting me. She thinks she's the reason I got kidnapped and hurt," Maura whimpered. "Jane said leaving was the only way to keep me safe. She blames herself…"

"That's what I was afraid of," Angela sighed.

"It's not fair," Maura sobbed. The emotions were strong now, slipping out of the cold front she'd used to hold in her agony. Now with the flood gates open, she felt like she couldn't stop. "I just got her back. I messed up in Paris – I know I hurt her and I ruined things for us. But we had a second chance and she just walked away…"

The doctor was looking up now and through her tears could see that Angela was quietly crying as well. Maura swallowed hard, hiccupping against another whimper.

"I love her. I've always loved her Angela," she confessed.

"I know honey," Angela nodded. She was still holding the doctor's hand and hastily wiped a tear away. She cleared her throat and turned serious. "Jane is so in love with you, Maura. Which is why you have to go and get her."

The statement came as such a shock that Maura stopped crying.

"What?" she said.

"Don't let her get away this time," Angela told her. "I love my daughter, but she is stubborn and thinks she's responsible for everyone else's happiness – and then she met you. It was the first time I saw her smile through the hard times. The first time she let herself be happy. Jane's hardly alive without you. She just exists. You need each other; don't let her get away."

Maura wiped away her tears. She realized she should have given the woman more credit all those years before. She knew Angela viewed her as a daughter, but she also expected her to resist Jane being in a relationship with another woman. Now it was clear all along she'd been the couple's biggest fan.

"Jane is the one who left, Angela. She doesn't want to be with me…"

"You're smarter than that," the Rizzoli matriarch nearly scolded her. "You two love each other, Maura. Go get her."

Angela's encouragement renewed her spirit. If it'd been possible, Maura would've jumped in her car and driven straight to Virginia that night. Instead, she dried her eyes and the next morning showered for the first time in days, wincing as the hot water hit her stitches and battered limbs. She struggled on her sore hip but managed to change into a blouse and jeans. She covered the scratches and bruises the best she could with make-up. A black eye still peaked out on her fair complexion, but she appeared more like her former self than she had since her kidnapping. Maura took a deep breath as she stared at herself in the mirror. This was it; she was going to get Jane back and this time she was going to keep her.

Her mother didn't protest when Maura hobbled in, leaning on her cane, asking for a ride to the airport just before six o'clock in the morning. She didn't explain the reason for her trip and Constance didn't ask. When she parked along the curb of Logan Airport, she cupped the side of her daughter's face.

"Good luck darling," she whispered.

"Thank you, mother," Maura said.

The doctor watched the sunrise on the Boston skyline as her plane took flight. Light reflected off the Atlantic. For the first time in a year and half, since Jane left Paris, a weight lifted off her chest. Her place in the world finally made sense. As if Maura could reach out and grab the future she'd always wanted.

A young FBI agent stopped her taxi when she arrived at the Academy. She handed him her license and identification badge, but he shook his head.

"You're not on the list."

"I'm the Medical Examiner for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts…"

"Yeah and you're not on the list," he cut her off.

Maura's jaw hitched and her eyes darkened.

"I believe you may be too new to understand, but I don't need to be on a list," she paused, looking at his nametag, "Agent Stevens. I've closed more cases than all your superior officers combined, I'm one of the country's top minds in forensics, and the Governor of Massachusetts is a personal friend. You can ask any of your superiors and they will testify not only to my qualifications but scold you for making me wait. But I'll have you get on your little radio and call Agent Gabriel Dean who will tell you to escort me in immediately. And if you waste a second more of my time, I promise you'll be stuck here checking lists for the next three years."

The taxi driver suppressed a smirk and the young agent blushed. "Sorry ma'am."

Whatever steely nerves motivated Dr. Maura Isles at the front gate all dissipated when she finally reached the classroom on the third floor. Maura gripped onto her cane a little harder. Tracking Jane down on the Quantico campus had been hard enough and during her search she couldn't find the woman fast enough. Now, peaking through the small window of the door, she was filled with apprehension.

Jane looked sexier than Maura remembered.

Something about seeing her at the head of the room, teaching a class of FBI agents, filled Maura's core with heat. She was gesturing toward a photo of an old crime scene on the projector behind her, dark hair rolling down her shoulders, jaw sharp and strong in her profile. Her toned arms filled out a black FBI polo shirt.

"In this case the victim was found in the woods on her back, naked and beaten. You can see the post-mortem lividity is sporadic and spread to different parts of the body. What does this indicate?"

"That the body was moved several times after the deadly assault," Maura spoke up.

The door in the back of the room closed behind her and the cadets turned in surprise. The doctor carefully moved down the aisle between the rows of desks, using the cane to help her.

"You can see the victim was found supine but most of the pooling is across the abdomen and chest, indicating that the victim was initially kept prone. If I remember this case correctly, that's because the woman was transported in the backseat of a car," Maura concluded.

She stopped a few rows back from Jane, whose mouth was agape. Her brown eyes took in Maura as though she were seeing a ghost. Desire flashed across her gaze and she couldn't stop the smirk that twitched her mouth.

"That's right Dr. Isles," Jane said, her voice cracking. She pulled in a slow breath. "What are you doing here?"

A low murmur sounded across the room as the students began whispering to each other. The kidnapping had made national headlines. Jane's involvement in the case spread quickly across Quantico and the renowned medical examiner was recognizable to almost everyone.

"You left," the doctor said. "We finally found each other again and you ran away."

"Maura…"

"You said it was to protect me, but you don't get to make that choice alone, Jane. We're partners. We always have been and before all this nonsense with Keller, you wanted to be together…"

The words came quickly, and the doctor didn't care that they had an audience. She ignored the whispers and in fact, forgot about everything except Jane.

"It was foolish of you to leave. It was selfish and I know you're scared but…"

"Maura please…"

"I'm not going to let you go this time. I'm not, I-I-I..."

Jane stepped forward, putting herself just inches away from Maura. The doctor worried that perhaps the woman was angry or embarrassed that she'd disrupted her class, airing their relationship problems, but instead her face was soft and full of love.

"Maura please stop," Jane said. "You don't have to do this."

"But I do, I…"

"This is my last day. This is my last class," Jane smiled. "I put in my resignation."

"You what?" Maura stammered.

She could hear some of the cadets chuckling and cooing behind her and for the first time heat flooded her cheeks. Jane put a comforting hand on the doctor's shoulder and looked out with authority to the rest of the room.

"Everyone out. Ten minute break, okay?" Jane instructed. Her commanding voice caused goosebumps to rise on Maura's skin. The former detective, gave her arm another comforting squeeze, sensing the doctor's nerves. When the last student filed out, Jane settled her gaze back on Maura. "That was some entrance."

"Jane, what do you mean you put in your resignation?" she asked. She was too shocked to say anything else.

"I was wrong to leave," Jane told her. "I don't want to lose you again. And as much as I'm afraid that I won't be able to protect you, it's not worth wasting anymore time. I promised you in that cabin that we wouldn't waste any more time."

"So you're coming back?" Maura asked. A lump formed in her throat. "You're coming back to Boston?"

"I'm coming back to you – wherever that is. You're my home," Jane said, sniffling herself now. "I love you."

Maura didn't say it back and instead placed both hands on Jane's cheeks, pulling her in for a kiss. Her lip were warm and familiar. The touch of skin filled her body with excitement and she embraced Jane as if she may never hold her again. When they pulled away, an errant, unstoppable thought flashed across her mind.

"I think you should move in," Maura said abruptly.

The words slipped out unconsciously, but the idea felt right as soon as she verbalized it. If Jane was coming back to Boston, Maura wanted all of her. She wanted their life to begin immediately. She gaged Jane's reaction, worried that she'd been too forward.

"I think we should get married," Jane replied just as impulsively.

The doctor's mouth dropped. If Jane wasn't holding her, she may have wavered on her weak hip.

"You don't have to say anything now. It's just all I could think about once I got here. It's why I knew I had to quit and come back home…"

"Yes," Maura interrupted.

"What-what?" Jane stammered.

"I think we should get married too," the doctor said breathlessly.

Jane smiled wider and her dimples went deeper than Maura had ever seen. Her heart was light with a happiness she'd never felt. Everything in her, the world around them, suddenly made sense. Every heartbreak, every missed opportunity, and challenge that led them to that moment felt worth it. Joyful tears filled Maura's gaze. Jane kissed her softly, not letting go. When she pulled back, she appeared just as emotional but managed to reign herself back in.

"Will you stay while I finish teaching this last class?" she asked.

"Of course, Jane," Maura whispered with a gentle smile.

* * *

_Thank you for reading and reviewing! I'm having fun writing this one and a lot more Rizzles fluff is ahead, along with some developments in the Denton case. Side note - I definitely picture Noah Centineo as Owen. I'll be flushing him and the other Rizzles kids out as we go along too. - SJ_


	11. Chapter 11

Jane's Quantico apartment was already in boxes when she and Maura arrived after her last day of teaching at the FBI Academy. She wasn't sure if she'd been able to pack so quickly because she was eager to return to Boston or because the place had never felt like home to begin with. It had always felt oddly temporary and certainly not somewhere that encouraged sentimentality.

The movers would come in the morning and while she was eager to get their life started in Boston, Jane was grateful for a moment to breathe. Maura's arrival had not just been unexpected but also the end of an exhausting emotional roller coaster. It was hard to believe just one week earlier they'd finally reconnected after Paris. Now they were seated on a mattress in the middle of her empty apartment, the world full of possibilities as they prepared to face it for the first time as a couple.

"This brings back old memories," Jane said, handing Maura a cold beer.

The doctor grinned as Jane settled down next to her. She quickly leaned in and kissed the brunette on the lips as though they'd been doing it their entire lives. As they pulled way, Jane blushed.

"Do I make you nervous?" Maura teased.

"I guess I'm still getting used to this," Jane smirked. This time she kissed the doctor's plump lips. "Yeah, I think we'll have to keep doing that until it all sinks in."

"Oh, you're employing exposure therapy," the doctor winked. She kissed her deeper, running her tongue across Jane's, making her heart flutter as desire fueled her movements. She pecked her lips a few more times, finally pulling away to take a breath. "Does that help?"

Jane's heart was racing, and she could only manage a nod. Her brown eyes lingered on Maura's mouth and she was about to move in for another kiss, but the doctor put a light hand on her chest, holding her back. Jane's face fell into a childish grimace.

"I don't want you to think you're entirely forgiven. I'm still upset you left like you did," Maura said. She wanted more of Jane but knew that if they didn't have a discussion, the relationship would start on the wrong foot. And despite the joy of reuniting, Jane's exit had broken her heart.

"I'm sorry," Jane replied genuinely, looking away and bowing her head. She grabbed Maura's hand, squeezing it tenderly. "I thought I was protecting you."

"You can't take sole responsible for my safety," she replied. "But I know it's more than that. You didn't stay and fight; that's not like you Jane."

The former detective swallowed hard. She stared past the empty living room and out the windows. The summer night was clear and dark and the sky was speckled with stars. Crickets chirped in a steady rhythm, helping to settle her nerves. It was the only way she'd managed to calm herself since returning to Quantico. For the last days the fear wouldn't leave her. It was as though the terror was on repeat – seeing Maura's lifeless face, turning away from Officer Emily Owens, and screaming at Frankie to drive faster. It kept her from sleeping.

"It's not just nearly losing you that sent me running," Jane started. "It's just this whole damn case. I met Emily Owens family that morning at the hospital when I was away."

"I thought you were speaking with Internal Affairs," Maura said in confusion.

Jane still stared ahead and nodded. "I did. They ended up blaming my so-called disobedience on Korsak. In their report they say he lost control of the case. He's being singled out for Officer Owens coming with me because he was the senior investigator and shouldn't have let a consultant and a rookie patrol cop pursue a lead on their own – even though if we hadn't gone, you would've never been found."

"Sergeant Korsak knew letting you go was the best chance of finding me," Maura agreed. She rubbed Jane's back, attempting to bring her some comfort. The doctor frowned as she realized how much she'd been wrestling with.

"Yeah, well, they're forcing him out," Jane muttered. "He told me that day he was retiring. He said it was the best way to keep his name and reputation intact. Of course, he said it wasn't my fault, but I can't help but feel I ended his career…"

"You know that's not true," Maura whispered. She gently kissed the skin behind Jane's ear and then rested her nose against her cheek. She put her hand on the woman's knee. "And after that you met Emily's parents?"

Jane frowned and held Maura's hand tighter. She looked away from the windows and traced gentle fingers across the doctor's knuckles.

"And her fiancée. They thanked me for trying to help her and her father told me how much Emily had looked up to me," Jane sighed. "I'd never felt so ashamed. I kept seeing her face, how desperate she was when she asked me to help her. How she shouldn't have been there. How Korsak shouldn't be held responsible for something I did. How you shouldn't have been shot. It just hit me all once and for some idiotic reason, I thought coming here would magically fix it."

"Why didn't you call me when you realized it didn't?" Maura asked.

"You deserved more than a phone call," Jane said. She finally looked at the doctor, eyes glimmering in the dim light. "Thank you for coming after me when I was too dense to see this is all I needed."

"Well, I haven't exactly helped this relationship along either," she replied. Jane simply raised Maura's hands to her lips, holding it there while the doctor continued in a gentle voice. "You went through a lot, Jane."

"I wasn't the one who got kidnapped and shot," she told her softly. She tucked a golden strand of hair behind the doctor's ear. "Do you still have nightmares?"

Maura gave a sad nod, swallowing down the urge to whimper. "It's a normal part of post-traumatic stress and typically the symptoms dissipate with therapy."

"That doesn't make it easier," Jane told her. "I won't leave you again. I promise."

The doctor melted into her and Jane slowly laid them back on the mattress. Maura nestled her face into Jane's neck, breathing in her familiar scent. The former detective kissed the top of her head and wrapped strong arms around her, careful of the doctor's healing injuries.

"I was serious, you know; about you moving in," Maura whispered.

"I was serious about marrying you," Jane said. "Though that wasn't the proposal I had in mind."

"You'll have plenty of time to get it right," the doctor smiled.

They stared at each other for a long moment in the dark. Familiar heat passed between them. Maura leaned in first, kissing Jane's neck and trailing her lips across her throat. A satisfied sigh escaped from Jane's mouth. She ran a nimble hand up the doctor's body, feeling every curve, lingering at her stomach. She slipped her hand beneath her shirt and the doctor moaned. Jane held one of Maura's breasts, tenderly squeezing it as she continued to give her long, deep kisses. Her desire was palpable as she straddled her uninjured leg. She moved her hand down from Maura's breast to her inner thigh. The doctor cooed and gripped onto the back of Jane's head, pulling at her dark hair. "Oh Jane…"

The former detective pulled in a breath and paused. "I don't want to hurt you…"

"If you don't touch me, I think I might have to hurt _you_," Maura chuckled. Her cheeks were red and she was nearly pressing herself into the brunette.

A cocky grin spread across Jane's face, her dimples popping at her desire. "You want me?" she asked seductively, her voice extra scrappy.

"All of you. Right now," Maura whispered, her breathy voice echoing just inches from Jane's ear. It sent tingles down her spine and in an instant she was back to ravaging the doctor with kisses, slowly working her mouth down lower. It didn't take long for them to remove their clothes or for the doctor to reach climax. She gasped when Jane traced her lips inside her thighs. By the time Jane finally used her tongue and fingers, Maura was near the edge. She tangled her hands in Jane's dark hair, pulling and moaning with each sensation. Her toes went numb and she couldn't keep her eyes open while she threw her head back to the pillow. When she came, she saw white and felt her entire body pulse with a pleasure she'd missed for the last year and a half. She screamed Jane's name and then went breathless. Nothing compared to the way she made her feel.

Jane was tender as Maura's orgasm coursed through her with intoxicating ecstasy. She kissed her stomach and her chest and her cheeks and forehead.

"I love you," Maura whispered when she caught her breath. Tears filled her eyes.

"I love you too," Jane kissed the side of her mouth. Maura captured her lips and glided her tongue inside. She pulled at the woman's waistband. "You don't have to, Maura. You're still recovering."

"I want to make you feel good," she breathed. Her voice was sultry, and Jane nearly bucked at the sound. Without missing a beat or making her wait much longer, Maura pressed her fingers into her, finding her wet and pulsating.

"Maura, Maura…Maura," Jane repeated over and over, doing her best to keep her weight off the doctor as she thrust against her hand.

"I want you to come," Maura told her.

"Maura…oh you feel so good," Jane whimpered.

"Yes, Jane. Come for me," the doctor said again.

This time Jane gave a long and hearty moan, indicating her orgasm. It quaked her entire body and Maura kissed her through every twitch and goose bump. The doctor slowly removed her hand and held the sides of Jane's face. The former detective opened her eyes and caught her breath, smiling down at the doctor.

"I missed that," she said with a gravelly chuckle.

She collapsed onto her back, her forehead misted with sweat. Jane grabbed Maura back into her arms, resting her lips on the doctor's temple. For several minutes they stayed in satisfied silence, naked and warm with their bodies pressed together. Maura traced her fingers across Jane's olive skin, admiring her firm stomach and chest. Her brain was still swimming with oxytocin.

"I keep thinking it must be true good to be real," she confessed. "I keep waiting to wake up."

Jane smiled and brushed a hand through Maura's now messy hair. "You're awake," she told her. "I wish we could just stay here forever. Maybe we don't have to go back to Boston."

"Boston is our home," Maura said gently. She adjusted so she could look at Jane and traced a hand down the side of her cheek. "You can't hide from our life there. We have people and responsibilities."

"I don't know if I'm ready," Jane confessed, swallowing past a lump in her throat.

"You won't be alone. We'll get through it together," she assured, squeezing onto her hand.

"Me and you always, right?" Jane whispered.

"Forever," Maura replied.

The move was rather painless. Within a week, Jane's belongings were integrated into the house on Beacon Hill. They were used to spending time together, even living together for weeks at a time, but it was still the first time either of them had lived with a significant other. Maura conceded some closet space and Jane learned to keep her sports equipment out of the foyer closet. Maura allowed for a coffee pot in addition to the espresso machine and Jane insisted on cooking dinner at least twice a week.

"I will contribute to this household Dr. Isles," she had winked.

Angela was more than thrilled to have Jane back and see her so clearly smitten. She was surprisingly respectful of the couple's space. Jane guessed it was in part that her mother was still getting used to the idea. She still seemed to blush when she would kiss Maura on the way out of a room or when the doctor let loving pet names slip. Angela certainly wasn't against their relationship – she helped to make it happen after all– but a lifetime of Catholic foundation took some adjustment. Of course, it didn't keep her from insisting on a dinner party once they were settled in.

Korsak, Kiki, Frankie, Nina, Tommy, TJ, and Sean – who Angela was dating again – all filled the house with noise on a hot August evening. They toasted the good times – Jane's return, Frankie and Nina's upcoming wedding – and the not so good times – Korsak's untimely retirement and a moment of silence for Emily Owens. In the end, though, it was all laughter. The Rizzoli siblings teased each other, Angela attempted to keep everyone behaved, and all the while Maura didn't stop smiling. She put her hand on Jane's knee beneath the table and without hesitation, the woman quickly picked it up, interlacing their fingers. They were exactly where they were supposed to be.

"That was perfect," Maura said as they cleaned up in the kitchen.

Jane came up behind her, looping her arms around her waist as she finished washing dishes. She kissed the back of her neck and the doctor ginned, resting her head back against her shoulder.

"You, Korsak and Lieutenant Cavanaugh talked for a long time," Maura observed. She'd watched in curiosity as they slipped out onto the patio, sharing a beer. She'd stayed behind to play with TJ and help Angela finish cooking, but kept an eye out all the while, watching as Jane went back and forth between folding her arms across her chest and gesturing passionately with her hands. "What was it about?"

Jane loosened her grip around her waist and Maura turned in her arms to face her.

"They've recommended me for Sergeant," she shared.

The doctor's mouth dropped. They hadn't discussed what Jane would do now that she was back in Boston. She'd considered going into the private sector or maybe finding another teaching job. She certainly wanted to return to BPD, but with how things had ended with Emily Owens, she thought it nearly impossible.

"They want me to take Korsak's place," Jane explained. "I'd have to pass the exam of course…"

"Which you will have no problem doing," Maura said. She placed her hands on her girlfriend's shoulders. "What do you think?"

"It feels wrong to take the position I got Korsak fired from…"

"Jane, you know that's not how it went."

"Internal Affairs will probably have a cow, those ass hats…"

"Jane," Maura sighed. "What do you want?"

The brunette paused, unable to avoid Maura's ability to cut right to whatever bothered her most.

"I want it," Jane nodded.

"Then go get it," the doctor said firmly.

Her encouragement sent a feverish chill down Jane's spine. She carefully closed the space between them, locking Maura into a tight embrace. Her mouth attacked the doctor's and she slid her tongue into her mouth, running her hands up her sides. Maura held onto Jane's firm jaw hardly able to keep steady against the woman's eagerness. When they pulled away, Jane's eyes were dark and full of lust. Maura's heart raced and she smiled as she traced a finger down to her girlfriend's wanting lips.

"I'm not going to get to finish the dishes, am I?" the doctor asked.

"I'm afraid not," Jane replied with a grin before pressing her against the counter with another powerful kiss. Not only would she not finish the dishes, but they wouldn't make it out of the kitchen.

The next weeks passed in a sort of quiet bliss, similar to their time in Paris. Maura took an extended leave from work to heal and Jane studied for her Sergeant's exam with her help. The doctor enjoyed quizzing and teasing her girlfriend as they curled up in bed, often using sexual favors and intimacy as a reward. Jane in turn helped Maura in her recovery, taking her to physical therapy and helping her with her exercises to strengthen her hip. At night, when Maura had nightmares of Keller, it was Jane who held her. And when Jane couldn't go to sleep, the doctor would stay up with her, stroking her hair and back until she calmed down. Each morning started with a kiss and every night they whispered to each other in the dark – many times bringing each other to peak physical fulfilment but more often simply holding one another.

The hardest day was Officer Emily Owens funeral. Neither admitted to the other that they didn't want to go; that much was obvious. But Maura felt obligated since Emily had helped save her life and Jane was still too wracked with guilt to skip. So they went together, holding hands in a back pew of the packed church, staying stone faced when the bagpipes belted Going Home and the young woman's fiancée sobbed over her casket. It struck them that it could have been one of them. It could have easily been Maura that Jane had to bury.

The night before her Sergeant's exam, Jane stayed wide awake. She wasn't worried about passing the test; she'd spent two weeks studying and she despite nearing forty, she was in top shape.

"Maur, are you awake?" Jane whispered.

Usually if Maura fell asleep before she did – which was almost always, Jane would cope with her insomnia in silence. But tonight she didn't care about waking her up. The panic hit her with fresh urgency.

"What is it sweetheart?" the doctor yawned. "Did you have nightmare?"

"I can't sleep," Jane said.

Maura wiped her eyes, adjusting her vision to take in Jane's outline in he dark. She could see her twinkling brown gaze, so childlike and sweet – a great juxtaposition to the woman that provoked fear in so many. It's was one of the things the doctor first loved about her.

"Are you worried about your test?" Maura asked.

"No," she said. "I need to know that you're okay with me doing this. That it's okay I'm going back to BPD to be a detective."

"Of course, I'm okay with it, Jane. I'll always support what you want to do," Maura replied in confusion.

"Even if it almost got you killed?" she asked.

"Oh Jane," the doctor sighed. She snuggled in closer, her nose just inches away from Jane's face. "You've always known that this is what you want to do. It's your calling."

"It never meant losing you before. What if you had died? What if we want to have a family later and…"

"Nothing is going to happen to me. And if it does, I take my own risks, Sergeant," Maura whispered gently.

She could see Jane smile in the dark.

"That's bad luck," she chuckled.

"You don't need luck," the doctor said, kissing her cheek. "You are the best at what you do, Jane. You bring justice to the voiceless. I fell in love with you watching you work tirelessly for families that were broken, saving kids from horrible situations, and putting yourself in danger without a second thought to help someone else – though it's hard to watch you do that last one. I've seen you go days with no sleep to track down a killer and I've seen you save countless lives. You bring people the closure they need. It's what you were born to do."

"You're amazing, you know that?" Jane whispered.

"Yes," Maura smirked, her eyelids already growing heavy as she yawned again. She pulled Jane down to lay on her chest. "Go to sleep. You need rest if you're going to PR in the mile. It would be embarrassing if the rookies showed up the infamous Jane Rizzoli."

Jane not only finished with a personal best but a top score for her physical exam. She passed her Sergeant's test with flying colors. And a week later, Maura was ironing her Class A's, insisting she looked beautiful in the formal uniform. The promotions ceremony was well attended. This time the bagpipes played a happy tune and the air was full of celebration. A stark contrast to Officer Owens funeral. The Rizzolis packed into the back, Frankie in his formal police dress and TJ standing on a chair, watching in awe. They cheered obnoxiously when Lieutenant Cavanaugh stepped up the microphone and said her name.

"It's an honor to welcome back one of Boston's finest. Sergeant Jane Rizzoli has dedicated 18 years of her life to BPD. She was the youngest officer ever promoted to detective and the first woman to serve on the drug control unit – working several years undercover. As a detective she cleared more than ninety-percent of her cases, which in four decades is something I've never seen before. In 2012, Sergeant Rizzoli stopped a hostage situation at the Division One Precinct and saved her brother, Officer Frankie Rizzoli's life by taking a bullet. She's been awarded a Purple Shield and a Combat Cross for her bravery. Jane took a brief hiatus with us to teach cadets at the FBI Academy. She's more than deserving of this promotion and we look forward to her leadership. We are honored to have you back with us, Sergeant Rizzoli."

The crowd burst into applause and Jane blushed. Even among the cheers and commotion, all she saw was Maura, beaming from the front. Her bruises were healed and she no longer used a cane. She stood bright and radiant and the newly minted Sergeant lost her breath.

"I would like to now invite Sergeant Rizzoli's fiancée – Dr. Maura Isles, Chief Medical Examiner for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts to the stage for the pinning ceremony."

If the enthusiasm seemed loud before, it was certainly louder now. It didn't help that Tommy and Frankie took to whooping and whistling in the back. Lieutenant Cavanaugh and three other commanding officers saluted Jane, who brought a white gloved hand to the brim of her police hat. It felt right to be back with the gun in her holster and the medals on her lapel. She tried to keep her face steady and stare ahead when Maura appeared in front of her, but not even she could stay stoic. The doctor was grinning from ear to ear, her green eyes glistening with pride. The Sergeant smiled back as Maura pinned the gold badge to her chest.

"I'm proud of you," she mouthed adorably as to not disrupt the serious nature of the ceremony.

"Thank you," Jane whispered.

They shared a quick kiss and then there was another round of applause. After the ceremony they must have shaken the hands of every BPD official, many of them congratulating Jane and happy to see the beloved doctor in good health. If there was such a thing as celebrities or a favorite couple at the station, they were certainly it. A few of the detectives and colleagues that knew the pair, gave the new Sergeant a sly smile. "I knew it Rizzoli," Rafael Martinez – now Captain of the Drug Unit – told her as they shook hands.

"Couldn't get anything past you, could I?" Jane rolled her eyes.

"Congratulations," he nodded. He smiled at Maura. "To both of you."

The rest of the celebration moved to The Dirty Robber. After several rounds of drinks, and Maura at her side, Jane led them along the harbor. The night was warm, and the humidity of the August day was finally fading. She kept her hat and white gloves tucked under one arm and held Maura's hand with the other.

"How does it feel to have your badge back?"

Jane had fallen into such a peaceful reverie on their walk that Maura's soft voice nearly startled her. A grin stretched her mouth and she gave a happy sigh.

"It feels good. Really good. I didn't realize how much of me was missing without it," the Sergeant confessed. "I couldn't have done it without you."

"Yes, you could have," Maura said.

"Well, it took you to make me realize where I belong," Jane replied. She squeezed the doctor's hand, getting a heartwarming smile out of her. Maura gave a light chuckle. The Sergeant recognized she was slightly buzzed and grinned. "What's so funny?"

"Lieutenant Cavanagh called me your fiancée," the doctor replied.

Jane gave a dramatic groan, "I could have killed him," she whined. "And my mother. That's her fault, blabbing about something that's not her business. I hate that they're dating again."

"I think it's sweet," Maura smiled, moving in closer to Jane and resting her head against her shoulder. She tucked her arm under Jane's so that they could be closer. Her heels were becoming more difficult to walk in after several glasses of wine and the multiple celebratory drinks that BPD officers insisted on buying them. She'd forgotten how much their colleagues could drink.

Jane was still outraged. "Mom and Cavanaugh, cute? Uh, no. Especially not when they're getting involved in our personal lives. Who does he think he is, my dad? Is he going to want me to call him that, because I refuse."

"You are incorrigible," Maura rolled her eyes with a laugh. "I think its sweet he gave me the title. He's clearly happy for us and so was everyone else."

"I was embarrassed," Jane muttered.

"Oh," the doctor said in clear disappointment. She slowed down and Jane did the same. Maura tried to stay unaffected, but her quivering lip did not go unnoticed by the Sergeant.

"Maura…"

"I suppose that's normal. You've never identified publicly as being in a same-sex relationship and tonight was very public and overwhelming and probably not the way you wanted to come out to your colleagues. You've always been very private. While I don't consider my sexual identity or partners a secret, I don't take offense if you do…"

"Honey, stop," Jane cut her off with a laugh. Maura physically obeyed as well, looking up at the uniformed Rizzoli in confusion. They stood at the railing along the Charles River, the stars high and their faces visible under streetlights. "I'm not upset about coming out. I couldn't be prouder to be with you, and for once, I really don't give a shit who knows."

"Why were you embarrassed then?" Maura asked, still clearly hurt.

Jane sighed and reached into the pocket of her pressed black slacks.

"Because you didn't have this," she said. She held a small jewelry box and Maura's mouth dropped. Her green eyes widened as she looked from Jane's hand, up to her face, and then back to the box. "I wanted to give it to you at a time that seemed right, and I've just been carrying it around like a dope for the last week. Which is honestly pretty stupid because it's not exactly cheap…"

She nervously revealed the diamond ring. It was made up of a simple, but large princess cut diamond in the center. Two smaller green stones were on either side of it and the band was made up of white gold embedded by even smaller diamonds.

"It took me awhile to choose; Constance actually helped. Those peridot jewels are your birthstone that she says your father got for you when you were born – well, when they adopted you. I thought it was suiting because they match your eyes," Jane rambled, waiting for Maura to react. The doctor stayed silent, staring at the ring. "But we can get something else, anything else you want. You have way better taste than me and it was kind of intimidating."

"It's perfect, Jane," Maura said gently. She was crying and the Sergeant tilted her head to the side. "And so thoughtful."

"Can I put it on you?" she smiled. Maura nodded and offered her hand. Jane slowly slid on the ring, grinning like a kid in a candy store. "Is it the right size?"

The doctor responded with an eager, passionate kiss, smashing faces with her fiancée so quickly that Jane laughed against her lips. Maura held on by the back of Jane's head, enjoying the feel of her mouth combined with the joy in her heart.

"I'm going to assume that means the rings fit and that your answer is still yes," Jane said in a rough chuckle.

The doctor nodded with a smirk and pulled on Jane's black tie. "You should wear this uniform more often, Sergeant," she said, drunk on the thrill of their official engagement and the wine of their previous celebration.

"Your wish is my command, Dr. Isles," Jane said, bringing her in for another kiss.

Two days later, the Medical Examiner was anxiously twisting the ring around her finger, ankles crossed as she sat in the passenger seat of Jane's car. It was their first day back at Division One. Part of her was thrilled to see the familiar front doors – another part of her shook with fear.

"You ready?" Jane asked her.

Maura continued to fiddle with her engagement ring. Her hip and shoulder ached. She hadn't been back in the station, back in the morgue, since Keller burst through her door and knocked her out.

She was grateful that Jane was back. Grateful for her presence and her ability to make Maura feel as though she were completely protected. It was also appeasing to see the woman she loved back in her element. Seeing the gun, badge, and phone on her belt struck her as a reminder of a sweeter time. Jane straightened her black suit as she got out of the car, looking as sharp and determined as ever.

They held hands until they reached the lobby. Angela waved to them from the café. The couple paused at the elevators.

Maura still hadn't answered her question, so Jane tried again.

"Hey, you going to be okay?" she asked tenderly. "You can take more time if you need it."

"I can do this," Maura nodded, putting on a resolute face. It melted Jane's heart. "I'll see you at lunch?"

"Of course," Jane whispered. She wanted to lean in and kiss her, but a chipper voice interrupted her.

"Sergeant Rizzoli; the files that you requested," a young patrol officer said, handing her a manila envelope.

"Thank you, Officer Hendricks," she replied in a raspy voice.

Maura's brow furrowed in confusion.

"It's your first day back, how do you already have a case?" the doctor asked.

"Just old work from before I left," Jane lied.

It took only a split second for Maura to sense that her fiancée was being untruthful. She adjusted the purse on her shoulder and stepped back from the elevator. Officer Hendricks nervously left them, and Jane tucked he file under her arm.

The truth was, she and Korsak and Cavanaugh hadn't just talked about her becoming a Sergeant that night at dinner.

The Denton case had hit a dead end.

A dead end that Jane was determined to finish.

But she wouldn't bring anyone else down with her this time.

"Jane…" Maura said again, her eyes so green and cutting that the Sergeant nearly faltered right there and spilled her guts in front of the elevator.

But the familiar, synchronized ring of their phones saved her.

"Rizzoli," Jane answered first.

"Isles," Maura said, pressing her phone to her ear. Her engagement ring twinkled on her left hand, making Jane's heart skip a happy beat. She would tell her future wife eventually. But for now, they would move forward.

"I'll drive," Jane announced when they hung up.

"You will tell me about that case, Sergeant," the doctor said, following her back to the car, clutching onto her bag with new confidence.

"I know, Maur," she agreed.

"But for now, it's good to be back," Maura admitted. She smiled at Jane from across the hood of the car before they got in. The Sergeant grinned back, never having felt so at peace.


End file.
